skip to main |
skip to sidebar
by Richard L. Weaver II
One of the most fascinating things I learned in a basic speech course I took as an undergraduate at the University of Michigan was information on the Johari (pronounced Joe-Harry) Window. It was named after its inventors, Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham, and the reason I liked it is because it was such a useful, practical model for describing the process of human interaction.
The Johari Window is simply a four-pane “window” which divides personal awareness into four different types, and these types are represented by the four quadrants of the window. The upper left pane is called the open window, and it represents all the information that is obvious and available to both individuals as they communicate with one another—information, that is, that both share such as dress, nonverbal cues (e.g., facial expression, eye contact, posture, gestures, and body movement), as well as the words and ideas actually exchanged.
The upper-right pane of the “window” is labeled the blind pane and represents an accidental disclosure area—things you do not know about yourself that others know. For example, what if others detect a reluctance to communicate, habits you are unaware of, or a pattern of communication (always avoiding looking others in the eye, for example) of which you are unaware.
In the lower left-hand corner the pane is labeled “hidden” because it represents self-knowledge that we deliberately hide from the other person. There are certain things all of us know that we do not want to share with others. For example, we may not want the other person to know how we really feel about them, really feel about the topic being discussed, or that we really don’t have the time to talk right now. Anything we want to keep hidden from the other person would fit in this window.
For me, however, it is the lower-right pane labeled “unknown” that has always captured my interest and attention for it truly represents the unopened doors of our lives—information that is unknown to yourself and unknown to others. This pane represents all the parts of you that are not yet revealed. That is—in other words— for us to grow, change, and develop in new ways, we need to move beyond our comfort zone and stretch. When I was introduced to this pane, one accompanying comment was: “A person’s mind stretched in a new direction, will never return to its original dimensions.”
What I have discovered through my teaching, speaking, and writing career—and it came as a shock—is that everyone doesn’t have the same motivation to grow, develop, and change. More likely, people fall along a continuum:
Blockers ___ Content ___ Apathetic ___ Appreciaters ___ Seekers
Just a brief word of explanation about this continuum may help. Moving from right to left, there are those I label “Seekers” who want desperately to find out all they can about themselves. You might even say they are on a mission of continual self-discovery. Then, there are “Appreciaters” who are not actually looking for information about themselves; however, if they discover it, that’s fine, and they appreciate and can deal with it. In the center of the continuum are the apathetic who just don’t care, or it doesn’t interest them in the least. Moving to the left of center are those I label “Content” because they are satisfied with who they are and with what they know.
Finally, at the far left on the continuum are “Blockers” who will take strides to prevent obtaining new information about themselves. They may be represented by comments such as, “I know what I know, and don’t you try to change that,” and they will purposefully avoid people and situations where growth, change, and development has the potential of taking place: “I’m done with school,” they might be heard saying.
The point of the continuum is to demonstrate that people have different views regarding the unopened, mystery doors of their lives. It is a little like teachers who enter a class of students to find them open, accepting, and responsive to new ideas versus teachers who enter a class of students who have no interest whatever in learning and only want to play video games or talk with each other.
For adults who appear at the center or to the left on the continuum there is likely to be little hope. As a teacher, it is something I really hate to say. But when you are trying to reach/teach those who are truly apathetic, truly pleased with who they are and what they know, or, actually blocking the effect of any new information, there are few resources anyone has. Admittedly, teachers may have some luck with the apathetic; however, in our media-saturated world, the things that would result in growth, development, and change, probably wouldn’t compete well.
When you think about opportunities that will enhance us—open those mystery doors of our lives—if they don’t offer greater adventure, excitement, interest, or challenge than what can be found in media-related activities and pursuits, what is likely to be the outcome? It may not be a fair comparison, but I’m afraid it’s the kind of comparison that suits the lives of many people today no matter where they lie on the continuum.
One essential key to opening mystery doors has to do with connecting with others. The most productive path is one that fosters a deep level of caring about other people, encourages supportive relationships, improved communication, creative ideas, positive emotions, and pleasant physical sensations. It is the path, too, of resolving conflicts, collaborating with others, and solving problems mutually. The only way to discover such a path is by adopting or demonstrating empathy, acceptance, honesty, and mutual respect. The more connectivity we promote, the more likely increased awareness, compassion, integrity, and heartfelt communications will result.
The way to transformation, transcendence, wisdom, spirit, and heart is by making a commitment to stretching the boundaries of our mental, spiritual, and physical worlds. With such dedication, we can then break out from our present comfort zones and develop meaningful, openhearted relationships, deep learning situations, intimate communication, profound ideas, poignant emotions, and physical renewal. Only with this kind of growth, change, and development can we open the mystery doors of our lives.
John Rowlinson, at LifeCoachExpert.com, has written an excellent essay entitled, Discovering Your Purpose in Life. There are three parts to this essay: 1) The Power of the Subconscious Mind, 2) How to Prepare Yourself for Uncovering Your Purpose in Life, and 3) Ways to Tap Into Your Inner Self. There is a great deal of practical advice here that is worth considering.
At Authenic-Breathing.com there is an essay entitled, Awakening to the Miracle of Ordinary by Dennis Lewis. The essence of this essay lies in Lewis’ comment, “We move through our lives in a state of waking sleep, a state of psychological, cultural, and spiritual hypnosis. Instead of experiencing ourselves consciously from moment to moment as living, breathing beings, we lose ourselves unconsciously in the various impulses and fragments of our self-images—our likes and dislikes, our pleasures and pains, our theories, our expectations, our dreams, our fears, and our beliefs. Instead of asking and reflecting on the hard, deep questions about the meaning of our lives, about who we are and where we are going, we look for easy answers to questions that don’t matter.” To change, we must open ourselves to the ordinary, everyday events of our lives. This essay is an enjoyable read.
©
Copyright 2008 - And Then Some Publishing, LLC
Fears and Phobias of Public SpeakingExciting new video by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
One of the primary reasons people avoid public-speaking situations has to do with the fears and phobias dredged up when the words "public speaking" are mentioned or when the thought of giving a public speech crosses their mind. There are six time-tested ways for dealing with these fears and phobias, and if you want change your attitude and take charge of your behavior, this new video on the "Fears and Phobias of Public Speaking" is an excellent place to start. Click here to watch the video
Thursday’s essay, “Open the mystery doors of your life,” is the second of three essays taken from the new book: You rules - Caution: Contents leads to a better life.
Share your And Then Some Link about opening the mystery doors of your life. What are your thoughts about it? Have you opened any mystery doors in your life? Can you tell us in what capacity you have opened mystery doors? With respect to opening mystery doors, what messages can you tell our readers? Can you share any tips, stories, or suggestions regarding opening mystery doors? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has opened mystery doors? Link us to your story...
Click here to LINK your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
Open the mystery doors of your life
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
The way to transformation, transcendence, wisdom, spirit, and heart is by making a commitment to stretching the boundaries of our mental, spiritual, and physical worlds. With such dedication, we can then break out from our present comfort zones and develop meaningful, openhearted relationships, deep learning situations, intimate communication, profound ideas, poignant emotions, and physical renewal. Only with this kind of growth, change, and development can we open the mystery doors of our lives.
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
When I first heard this phrase I doubted that one could actually help themselves with little or no outside assistance or influence. That is, I doubted that people could improve their situation by their own efforts. Oh, I knew that the idea of “pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps” had early American origins when people who had fallen down would literally grab a hold of their bootstraps—when the laces were made of leather—and use them to sit upright. I was aware that you could get out of difficult situations by your own efforts, but my doubts extended to any feats much greater than that. I was truly a skeptic.
Exactly when the realization occurred to me that indeed each of us has far greater control—power—over our lives than what we believe or imagine is unclear, but it happened while I was in college.
Until I went to college I followed the programming dictated by my genes and by my environment. I was truly unaware of the control—power—I had. I was like an animal that was locked in a cycle of instinct. When animals are hungry, they eat. When they hear a loud noise, they run. When they are attacked, they fight. When they come into season, they mate. Animals live the way their genes and their environment have programmed them to live. They lack the control—power—that humans have.
But to recognize the control—power—we have requires both awareness and experience. For me, it happened when I realized that I had control—power—over my destiny. If I took the right courses, made the right choices, and performed at my best, I could take advantage of the control—power—I had over my life. What an incredible realization!
It was as if I had to transcend my programming. It wasn’t that my parents or my teachers were giving me bad advice or the wrong advice, it was as if—suddenly—I was in charge of my own programming. I realized that what I did and did not do had very significant results which would directly affect my life. I now—suddenly—had the control. It wasn’t that the power was given to me; it was there all the time. It was simply that I not only became aware of it, but I realized I could use it to make decisions, solve problems, and choose how I wanted to respond to the things in my world. Suddenly, I was programming myself.
This realization changed my life. This realization determined my fate. This realization directed the courses I was to take and the profession I was to choose. How did this happen?
Until college, I had allowed my life to serve the ends that had been handed down to me. From kindergarten through two years of college, I was trying to make my parents happy. I knew that becoming a medical doctor would do it, and I had rationalized this lifetime outcome and accepted it as my own. But when I realized the control—power—I had (could wield), I realized at the same time that I could break the chain of events that had shaped who I was, and I could learn to shape myself. It was just the power I needed to participate in my own fate!
I wish I had written it down—when that moment occurred—because as I look back on it now, it was as if a lightning bolt had woken me up from a deep sleep. I needed that lightning bolt to wake me up to my own strength. I needed that lightning bolt to wake me up to the role I wanted to play in my own destiny. I needed that lightning bolt to shock me into the discovery that I had the control—the power—to choose what I thought, what I did, and what I said.
The difference between being asleep and being awake is the same difference between having a dream and making that dream come true.
The reason I wish I knew exactly when that moment occurred is because that was the very moment I understood that my life was going to be whatever I chose to make it. It was an astonishing new world for me. What is it that happens to you when you suddenly realize that you are in charge? What changes occur in your psyche when you realize that you are the master, leader, ruler, manager, supervisor, or commander, and the people in your charge must do exactly as you dictate? It’s a real “head-trip” isn’t it? It’s like a power surge with all the corresponding electrical sparks sending out shock waves in all directions.
Suddenly I became aware of the limitless possibilities that surrounded me. All at once I felt both a sense of humility and power. I felt humility because I realized that life is a gift—in humble, meek, and submissive honesty, I realized that I didn’t ask for life. It was simply given to me. But, too, I can’t deny it; thus, I accept the gift of human life with acknowledgment, appreciation, gratitude, and thanks. Animals weren’t so lucky; I was. And animals weren’t given the most potent gift of all—the power to choose. They don’t have the same control or power that I have.
That lightning bolt did not just wake me up, it thrust me out of bed and onto a life course of growth, development, and change like nothing I had previously experienced. As a child, I was, by nature, dependent. Often, for many people, that dependency continues into adulthood, and it could have for me as well—relying on others, or on circumstances, to give me what I wanted, instead of taking that responsibility upon myself.
When I woke up to the power of choice, I not only became aware of my own strength, I became forever independent. I realized that I could give myself what I wanted, and I was no longer content to rely on others to get it for me. I realized what I could give myself, and I was no longer willing to accept only what the world felt like giving me. In this way, I could now refuse to settle for less. What control—power—I had!
How important was this realization for me? It was like I had suddenly come to my senses. I now saw things more clearly than ever before. My limitations were no longer limitations. I saw them for what they really were—bad dreams. When viewed in this way, bad dreams quickly lost their power over me in the same way nightmares lose their edge the moment I wake up.
When the realization of my control, power, and choice over my life occurred, I felt a great sense of freedom and possibility. It was as if there was a freeing of the spirit, a release of my creative juices, a liberation of my inner being. I found myself free to imagine more useful thoughts, to dream more pleasant dreams, and to turn those dreams into reality—to pull myself up by my own bootstraps!
At Zen-Moments: Self-Help for Sensitive Souls, there is a terrific essay entitled, “Empowerment: The Courage to be Yourself,” that can be summed up in the author’s own words, “One small action on another, properly directed, will dramatically change your life if you just keep doing it. Action speaks loudest in this world. You will become whatever you do, and you can do it a bit at a time.”
At Tomorrow’s Edge, Skye Thomas has written a number of essays about personal development and self-empowerment. How we get along with others as well as ourselves and how we find passion are common themes. “Personal growth and self-help doesn’t have to mean that you’re messed up or that there’s anything wrong that needs ‘fixed,’” Thomas writes, “It just means that you are taking control of your approach to life, your habits, your choices, and the overall direction of your personal development and self-empowerment.”
©
Copyright 2008 - And Then Some Publishing, LLC
Introducing two new videos by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD that serve as a great introduction to each of his recent books.
The first new video is You Rules: Caution contents leads to a better life.
This book was just released and is available at Amazon.com where you can "Look Inside".
The second video is Public Speaking Rules!: All you need for a GREAT speech!
This book introduction helps you know what to expect. Jam packed with the basics, the fundamentals, and a resource you can go back to again and again. This book is also available at Amazon.com. Don't just speak... make public speaking RULE!
*If you've visited us recently and don't see the video's, don't forget to hit the reload/refresh button on your browser.
Thursday’s essay, “Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps,” is the first of three essays taken from the new book: You rules - Caution: Contents leads to a better life.
Share your And Then Some Link about pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps. What are your thoughts about it? Have you done it? Can you tell us in what capacity you have pulled yourself up? With respect to pulling yourself up, what messages can you tell our readers? Can you share any tips, stories, or suggestions regarding pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps? Link us to your story...
Click here to LINK your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
When the realization of my control, power, and choice over my life occurred, I felt a great sense of freedom and possibility. It was as if there was a freeing of the spirit, a release of my creative juices, a liberation of my inner being. I found myself free to imagine more useful thoughts, to dream more pleasant dreams, and to turn those dreams into reality—to pull myself up by my own bootstraps.
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
There is no doubt that a democratic government exists to serve the people and democracies grant many freedoms to their citizens, but when you talk to some people it seems they like the rights they are given but, somehow, tend to downplay or not mention at all, the responsibilities. When you recognize the time and hard work involved in being part of a democracy, however, it is no wonder that the responsibilities often go unvoiced.
Much of the information in this essay comes from a web site, “Principles of Democracy,” and an essay there, Citizen Responsibilities, sponsored by International Information Programs.
Some of the responsibilities of citizens of democracies are clear simply because we face them on a regular basis. For example, respecting the law, paying taxes, accepting the authority of the elected government, and respecting those who have points of view that differ from our own, are some of these. These are clarified, obviously, when we see law enforcement officers, receive the tax forms from the government, see and hear our elected officials in action, and enter a discussion with someone from an opposing political party.
Many people take the democracy we live in for granted. That is, they seldom give it a second thought. Why? Because they were born and raised under its banner. They didn’t choose it; it was always there. That is why it is sometimes said that converts make the strongest believers because they choose what they want to believe, and when their choice is made, they give all their heart and soul to their newly held belief. How many people do you know who were born into a democracy and give all their heart and soul to it? Perhaps that’s too much to ask.
That only a few who live in a democracy participate is not new. According to Wikipedia, in Ancient Greece, “Of the 250,000 inhabitants only some 30,000 on average were citizens. Of those 30,000 perhaps 5,000 might regularly attend one or more meetings of the popular Assembly.”
What if elected officials in a democracy suddenly said, “Unless you [citizens] bear the burden of the democracy you live in [in obvious and manifest ways], you will not benefit from the protection of your rights?” Oh, I know it’s preposterous, but can you imagine the ramifications of such a move? Perhaps there would be an explosion of selfless service, volunteerism, joining of political parties, people running for office, letters to the editor by those speaking out on local and national issues, service on juries, joining of labor unions, community groups, and business associations, joining of the military, and an upheaval of those dissenting and criticizing their government — especially raising objections to such an absurd requirement.
If there was one, single, individual requirement I would make for all those who live in a democratic society, it would be to be informed. True democracy demands it. In August, 2008, Bill Maher said to Larry King (and has repeated several times since), “I often think they [Americans] are too dumb to be governed.” Having lived in East Pakistan (now Bangladesh) for one year of my life, I contend that there are a number of societies in the world that cannot, and are unlikely to ever be, true democracies — much to the chagrin of some in government. The simple fact is that democracies require an informed populace. An interesting question, of course, is, “How fast are we in the U.S. moving in that direction?” Or, are we already there? It’s a question worth pondering.
The problem is that democracies require more than just an occasional vote from its citizens to remain healthy. It may well be that the lack of steady attention, time, and commitment from many people has resulted in where we are today and what we have. I’m not saying that it did, but I would contend that with greater information, more informed (and perhaps better) choices would and could be made. No election should turn on one or two issues alone.
“The number one job of a citizen is voting in elections,” it says at “What is a citizen’s job? This essay continues, “Voting is the best check we have against tyranny in the government and incompetent politicians. If your Congressman is supporting abortion and you do not like it, vote him out. If your Senator wants to increase the power of the I.R.S. and you do not agree, vote him out. If the president cannot keep his pants on, and you do not think it is appropriate, vote him out. In the end it is the vote that makes politicians accountable. And, if you want to vote, the first thing to do is register. Today, this can even be done on-line through the American Voters Coalition and through M.T.V.’s Rock the Vote campaign. These two sites are not only a place to register but centers for the next job of a citizen — not just voting, but voting intelligently.”
I thought Wikipedia’s explanation of democracy is not only excellent, but the way this paragraph quoted from that makes the case for the importance of voting supports the point of this essay. “There are several varieties of democracy, some of which provide better representation and more freedoms for their citizens than others. However, if any democracy is not carefully legislated to avoid an uneven distribution of political power with balances such as the separation of powers, then a branch of the system of rule is able to accumulate power in a way that is harmful to democracy itself. The ‘majority rule’ is often described as a characteristic feature of democracy, but without responsible government it is possible for the rights of a minority to be abused by the ‘tyranny of the majority.’ An essential process in representative democracies are competitive elections, that are fair both substantively and procedurally. Furthermore, freedom of political expression, freedom of speech and freedom of the press are essential so that citizens are informed and able to vote in their personal interests."
Should we vote? Of course. But, also, we should be interested in giving all classes of citizens a full and equal right to vote as well. Federal elections should be national holidays, or, as in many European nations, extend over a weekend, as John Buell explains in his essay, Protecting Democracy in a Lame Duck Congress.
At the web site of the International Information Programs, in Chapter 12, “Rights of the People,” presents in excellent essay on “The Right to Vote,” which first presents the contents of the 15th, 19th, 24th, and 26th amendments to the U.S. Constitution, then presents the entire history and background of this essential and important right. This is an excellent and informative web site.
The web site of Vote Utah, at their “Learning Booth,” they have material on “Citizen Rights” that includes explanations of our freedom of religion, freedom of the speech, freedom of the press, and the right to assemble. Also, they explain the right to petition and additional freedoms as well as the rights of Black Americans and the rights of all Americans. The information is succinct and easy to digest.
Copyright And Then Some Publishing, LLC 2008
Last Thursday, October 23, 2008, we had a 12 hour "blip" in our blog service. There was an error on our end which was remedied as quickly as possible. And Then Some Publishing LLC apologizes for any inconvenience this may have caused.
There was some great news, however, that occurred on the same day. While waiting for the blog to come back, Richard L. Weaver II, PhD, shot 10 more videos. Yep, ten more videos! We will be releasing the new videos over the next few weeks so stay tuned to all our websites: publicspeaking rules.com and yourulescaution.com as well as andthensomeworks.com
Thursday’s essay, “The message citizens don’t want to hear,” is the third of three essays designed specifically for this presidential election period.
Share your And Then Some Link about citizenship. What are your thoughts about it? Have you taken an active part in our society? Can you tell us in what capacity you have been involved, if you have? With respect to citizenship, what would be your message(s) to citizens? Can you share any tips, stories, or suggestions regarding citizen responsibilities? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has been an involved and active citizen? Link us to your story...
Click here to LINK your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
The message citizens don’t want to hear
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
If there was one, single, individual requirement I would make for all those who live in a democratic society, it would be to be informed. True democracy demands it. In August, 2008, Bill Maher said to Larry King (and has repeated several times since), “I often think they [Americans] are too dumb to be governed.” Having lived in East Pakistan (now Bangladesh) for one year of my life, I contend that there are a number of societies in the world that cannot, and are unlikely to ever be, true democracies — much to the chagrin of some in government. The simple fact is that democracies require an informed populace. An interesting question, of course, is, “How fast are we in the U.S. moving in that direction?” Or, are we already there? It’s a question worth pondering.
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
It doesn’t come as a surprise that people, in general, prefer entertainment over almost any other choice, and when it comes to speeches, entertainment over substance. One reason Ronald Reagan was considered a great speaker was because he told great stories — and people connect with stories. Sarah Palin’s speech at the Republican convention went over well because she connected with the people, and her story of the difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull has been repeated and remembered by most everyone. The difference? Lipstick.
People have never been good at detecting issues (substance) in speeches no matter the length, speaker, or situation. It happens in the academic environment, too. A short survey I conducted in a class of over 300 second-year students showed they prefer an entertaining instructor who did not know his or her material well to a knowledgeable one who delivered material in a dry manner.
Stories, laugh lines, one-liners, and cute phrases capture attention, hold interest, and make the evening news. Entertainment sells; however, should that be a criterion, even a minor one, for a candidate running for president? Obtaining the highest office should not be a laughing matter.
- - - - -
A question to both presidential candidates on the CBS Evening News with Katie Couric caught my attention. Asked if they would ever lie to the American people, both said, “Never.” Of course, what could they say when asked directly, only in my advertisements? Why is it they are willing to support advertisements during the presidential race that lie to the American people? And they end each ad saying, “I’m John McCain [Barack Obama], and I approve this message.”
I fully realize that presidential campaigns have never been genteel debates over policy disagreements. What is troubling is that both candidates promised that this would be a better campaign composed of more substantive discussions, and yet both have given in to the same imperatives that turned other campaigns ugly. They have abandoned honest attacks for distortion and outright falsehoods. The candidates won’t lie, but they will allow it in their ads?
The problem is that advertising works, and the candidates know it. My wife and I were on a “great rivers” cruise during the last presidential election (George W. Bush vs. John Kerry), and we were seated in the dining room talking with an ex-military man and his wife about the election. To support his vote for George W. Bush, the fellow repeated, almost verbatim, ideas he had gleaned from the swift-boat advertisements. To him, a former military man, the swift-boat ads proved the illegitimacy of John Kerry’s credentials and, thus, his candidacy. It shocked us that someone actually took those ads seriously, believed exactly what they said, and used the information from them as part of their own belief system.
- - - - -
It’s emotion over logic, passion over rationality, and fervor and fervency over wisdom and good sense. This is a fundamental for some! There are people who vote based on emotion, passion, and fervor. If it isn’t what they themselves feel passionate about, it is the passion created at the decision-making moment — whether by a candidate, a misstep, an advertisement, or the media. This is especially true for those who haven’t made up their minds (or say they haven’t), and it can be that it is some small, truly insignificant item that tips the emotional balance.
This isn’t the case of being democrat or republican, liberal or conservative, a religious fundamentalist or otherwise where the choice of candidates is and has been clear for some time. These people are not those who swing elections one way or the other. They don’t need to listen to the candidates, absorb the advertising, read new information, or become better informed. In some cases they are simply bored by the entire process because their mind is made up.
It is the swing voters and independents (sometimes one and the same) who have no solid, identifiable allegiances who give credibility to last-minute emotion, passion, and fervor. It is the responsibility of voters to measure the sincerity, wisdom, undertone, and truth factor of the sound bites and advertisements designed to bypass logic, rationality, wisdom, and good sense.
- - - - -
There is something to solid consistency and evenness in disposition. When candidates appear stable and steady they come across as dependable and reliable. When candidates are full of surprises, unpredictable turns, eye-opening changes, astounding statements, and startling choices, it makes you wonder, and properly so, what their presidency will look like. Is it not a snapshot?
- - - - -
It is important for citizens, if not the candidates themselves, to keep their eyes on the issues. Democracies are built on and maintained by an informed citizenry. And by keeping their eyes on the issues, citizens are able to see through the manipulation that candidates, their parties, and the media promote through their tantalizing images and promises. When the country is facing record deficits, a crumbling infrastructure, a heavy dependence on oil, lack of incentives for developing green technologies, the need for universal health care, an unnecessary war that is killing young men and costing the nation enormous sums of money, and lack of support for stem-cell research, it must be clear — every voter must realize — that solid, realistic, and practical political programs demand compromise and some kind of sacrifice from each and every one of us.
- - - - -
It is important to have smart people running the government. True, it is no guarantee; nothing is. But there are advantages of having intellectuals in charge. First, they tend to surround themselves with other intellectuals --- knowledgeable, clear-headed, experienced, well-educated people. Second, they approach problems by considering alternatives, weighing possibilities, and taking time to arrive at answers. They are careful, methodical, meticulous, and thorough. Third, they are flexible and open-minded. Fourth, they are less likely to shoot-from-the-hip and make irrational, illogical, unfounded, senseless short-term decisions.
- - - - -
This election is unique; the two sides are truly different. No matter where you get your information, no matter the qualities you consider important, and no matter how you choose your candidate, the fact is that there is an enormous difference between the candidates, and who gets elected will have a major effect on each and every person in this country for years to come.
At essortment.com, there is a terrific essay entitled, “Understanding the importance of voting.” The essay underscores the importance of the future president’s selection of a (or several) Supreme Court justices and the influence the selections will have as many as 40 years into the future.
“Thoughts from another country on the U.S. election process,” offers a short essay that serves as a small window into our process by someone living abroad. It is not just interesting, it is refreshing as well.
Copyright And Then Some Publishing, LLC 2008
You Rules - Caution: Contents leads to a better life! is now available at Amazon.com
Click here to check it out
You Rules! answers the questions:
1. How do you establish the characteristics for success?
2. What are the essentials for a healthy lifestyle?
3. What methods can you use to get where you want to go?
4. How can you best exercise your creativity?
5. What can you do to maintain your program of self-improvement?
6. How do you look to a positive future?
With the answers to these questions, the guidelines offered throughout this book, your commitment and self discipline... you can obtain anything you desire in life.
Get a sneek peek into You Rules! Full chapters are available at YouRules.com. We're excited!
Thursday’s essay, “Random thoughts on the presidential election of 2008?,” is the second of three essays designed specifically for this presidential election period. It makes observations, raises questions, and offers suggestions.
Share your And Then Some Link about presidential elections. What are your random thoughts about them? Have you taken an active part in any of them above and beyond voting? Can you tell us in what capacity you have been involved, if you have? With respect to national (or state and local) elections, how would you encourage the public to become involved? What would be your message(s) to citizens? Can you share any tips, stories, or suggestions regarding politics, involvement in them, or in dealing with them in any capacity? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has been involved in politics at any level? Link us to your story...
Click here to LINK your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
Random thoughts on the presidential election of 2008
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
This election is unique; the two sides are truly different. No matter where you get your information, no matter the qualities you consider important, and no matter how you choose your candidate, the fact is that there is an enormous difference between the candidates, and who gets elected will have a major effect on each and every person in this country for years to come.
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
There are so many people and so many ideas about the qualities they want to see in a president, and, yet, it is surprising how often judgment about who they would vote for often comes down to a single item. For example, some will say, “I come from a Republican family; I was raised as a Republican; I will vote Republican [no matter who the candidate is]” or a similar comment. For others, who they vote for may come down to the single issue of experience, pro-life or pro-choice, pro-Abortion or not, pro gay-marriage or not, gun control, tax breaks for the very wealthy, pro-big business vs. pro-mainstreet, or some other issue or cause they support. In the forthcoming election, it may also come down to the issue of race, and if a woman was heading one of the tickets, then it could have been a gender issue, too.
The presidential election of 2008-2009 offers citizens the most dramatic set of choices in our history, and no one can look at both parties or both candidates and say, “One party [or candidate] is as good [or bad] as the other.” The distinctions are real, and they are substantive.
But the intention of this essay is not to clarify either the issues or the candidates’ stand on the issues. This is, rather (as much as is possible) a non-partisan essay designed specifically to formulate a set of credentials for whomever is to serve our country as president. It is then up to the reader, using this set of credentials or any other, to determine which candidate best measures up. The underlying intention, or ulterior motive, is to show how voting for a president requires a broad array of judgments, and using a single issue or even a small set of issues can easily betray one in making the best choice.
Ultimately, and this is important, who people vote for for president must be based on a dual set of characteristics. That is, it must be based on the qualities candidates will bring to the Oval Office as well as the qualities that make them a good candidate. That is, certain individuals will suit the times because of their peculiar character, just as one can easily delineate all the characteristics they would like to see in a person who becomes president regardless of who is running for the office. This essay is about the latter, however, often it is the former (the qualities candidates bring to the office) that get them elected.
One clear caveat must be that no candidate will be perfect, of course, and reasonable people will always differ on whether or not a candidate possesses the characteristics or not. This is the nature of the “beast” that is the subject of this essay.
All right, my first essential characteristic is that I want someone we can trust who can make rational, intelligent decisions that are in our country’s long-term best interests. Rational, intelligent decision-making requires thoughtful consideration — not making quick decisions, shooting from the hip, revealing macho bravado and instant decisiveness, operating on “gut” thinking, or following a plan only when the stars are properly aligned. I am looking for competence that includes superior intellectual ability.
This first quality rules out the desire for “someone who looks and acts like the average person,” “the person you could see yourself sitting down and having a beer with, “ or the quality reflected in the statement, “I like him (or her) because he (or she) is like us.” Presidents must not represent the average person. They must be intellectually superior and reveal flexibility and open-mindedness.
Part of the trust we place in presidents is that they will surround themselves with knowledgeable, clear-headed, experienced people who reveal divergent interests, suggest alternative points of view, and keep them (presidents) abreast of all there is to know about issues and problems. To have them surround themselves only with friends, sycophants, and “yes-men” (or “yes-women”) who subscribe to the same philosophy and support only the party-line-truths is a recipe for failure.
The second characteristic is that I want presidents willing to admit they are wrong or that an idea, program, suggestion, or approach was a failure. Admissions of personal failure or mistakes (without blaming the opposing candidate, party, or anyone else) are indicators of strength of character and people who are comfortable and secure with themselves.
The third characteristic is willingness to confront difficult problems and issues. Despite the political climate, opposing forces, lobbyists, and special interests, presidents must be willing to face the numerous problems of our society, and based on serious and mature reflection, present realistic and acceptable ways to deal with them. Presidents must be hard working and persistent.
The fourth characteristic is that I want presidents to represent all the people — not just the less fortunate nor just the rich. I want presidents to strive to do well for everyone. People of all colors, of all professions (and even those without one), of all levels of wealth (including those with no wealth at all), must feel that their president is looking out for their best interests, making judgments and decisions that will help them become better citizens, more improved human beings, or the society or environment in which they exist more suitable.
The fifth characteristic is that I want presidents willing to be transparent. I want them to tell me the truth. That is, I don’t want to be humored, coddled, or treated as a naive child incapable of understanding reality or making decisions. Presidents must be willing to share ideas and information openly with citizens, and they must be willing to listen to and, when appropriate, adjust to the views of those who disagree with them — rather than rejecting them outright or, using their “bully pulpit” to call their ideas irrelevant, insignificant, or inconsequential. There must be honest and demonstrated tolerance for those who disagree with them.
The sixth characteristic is that I want presidents who will truly unify the country, bringing disparate interests together, reaching across the isle to get things done and make progress, and who will make an indelible impression on everyone for their ability to make friends, generate warmth, demonstrate generosity, develop trust, and reveal kindness in this country and around the world. They must tolerate stress and adversity and demonstrate, as well, assertiveness.
These six characteristics provide a broad but sufficient base for measuring the qualifications of a potential president. There are a number of characteristics, however, that are (and should be) totally irrelevant to becoming president like a candidate's religion, marital history, race or ethnicity, financial background, or gender. If we are lucky enough to find a candidate who fulfills all six characteristics, he or she should not just get our vote, but, perhaps, be considered for the position of king or queen.
Ann McFeatters, syndicated columnist, has written, “Qualities for next president,” for the Daily News Tribune. Her essay adds some important qualities — like the ability to inspire others — to those I have mentioned above. This is a “must read” essay.
At MegaEssays.com, there is a short essay, “Qualities of a great president.” The essay primarily focuses on leadership qualities that are important.
Contact Richard L. Weaver II
Thursday’s essay, “What qualities make a good president?,” is the first of three essays designed specifically for this presidential election period.
Share your And Then Some Story about presidential elections. What are your thoughts about them? Have you taken an active part in any of them above and beyond voting? Can you tell us in what capacity you have been involved, if you have? With respect to national (or state and local) elections, how would you encourage the public to become involved? What would be your message(s) to citizens? Can you share any tips, stories, or suggestions regarding politics, involvement in them, or in dealing with them in any capacity? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has been involved in politics at any level? Can you tell his or her story? Feel free to use a pseudonym for the person’ real name.
Click here to share your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
What qualities make a good president?
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
The intention of this essay is not to clarify either the issues or the candidates’ stand on the issues. This is, rather (as much as is possible) a non-partisan essay designed specifically to formulate a set of credentials for whomever is to serve our country as president. It is then up to the reader, using this set of credentials or any other, to determine which candidate best measures up. The underlying intention, or ulterior motive, is to show how voting for a president requires a broad array of judgments, and using a single issue or even a small set of issues can easily betray one in making the best choice.
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
The messages could be, “Obey your parents,” or “Do what’s right,” or “Eat your vegetables,” but there are ten other messages I want to discuss in this essay. Are the messages I discuss more important than these? What could be more obvious or important than “Obey your parents,” or “Do what’s right?” The point is, there are numerous messages kids don’t want to hear, and I have selected my favorites.
The first message kids don’t want to hear is: Keep your room clean without being asked. What you may not know is that keeping your room clean is just part of a cleanliness, good hygiene, care and responsibility routine, and by establishing the routine early, you make it a habit to have your surroundings in good order. Just picking up after yourself can keep your room clean, contribute to a neat house, and help you find things when you want them.
It is easy to think of cleaning your room petty, trivial, and unimportant, but if you think of it as part of a cleanliness, good hygiene process that can and should include taking care of things you own (like your bicycle, video games, and clothes), caring for your pets, having a clean, good-smelling body, brushing your teeth, and, in general, presenting a fresh, upstanding, clean-cut image, you will be well on your way to presenting to others a positive character, pleasing personality, and likable and attractive self.
The second message kids don’t want to hear is: Learn how to read well. Whether you are asked to read by your parents or by your teachers, take every opportunity to do so. Also, read when you are by yourself, waiting for others, or trying to find something interesting to do. Always have a book or magazine with you. Good reading skills — which you develop simply by practicing it over and over — will help you do better in school, make all of your education easier and more comfortable, bring you a greater amount of information, and help you stand out from others. Good reading skills are the foundation from which all educated, intelligent, and well-informed growth and development can and will occur.
The third message kids don’t want to hear is: Take school seriously. If good reading skills are the foundation, then school is the structural support that is fastened to that foundation. Whether it makes sense to you now, whether you think it will be valuable to you in the future, and whether you want to accept what you are being told, all that you are learning in school will help you in the future. You are too young for it all to make sense; you are too young to see its value; and you are to young to be making judgments about what to accept and what to reject. Be a sponge, and absorb everything you are being told, everything you are reading, and everything that goes on each day in your classes. The big payoff will come, but you must be patient.
The fourth message kids don’t want to hear is: Stop wasting your time playing video games. As a brief recess from homework, as a break from doing your chores, or as a brief opportunity for doing something different, they are okay. But, the skills learned from playing video games will make no contribution to a successful life. All they will do is keep you from the other kinds of things you should be doing, and that includes reading, doing homework, playing outside, exercising, and talking with family and friends.
The fifth message kids don’t want to hear is: Keep physically active. Whether you are playing outside, riding your bike, walking to the store or school, or following a regular exercise routine, regular physical exercise is important. Often the habits that are necessary for keeping us young as we age, are habits established while we are young. Physical activity is a great compliment to mental activity (like reading), and the two of these will help you keep your body slim and fit.
The sixth message kids don’t want to hear is: Treasure your family and friends. It is easy, as a youth, to climb into your own, individually constructed, safe and protected world where others are not free to enter or intrude. You come home from school, you shut your bedroom door (maybe even post a sign on it that says, “Do Not Enter!”), and you escape into your space — away from family (as far as you can get, anyway) and away from friends (if you have any). Healthy children have friends; healthy children interact regularly with others; healthy children learn who they are through their interactions with others. To maintain contact is to sustain a healthy, social, support network.
The seventh message kids don’t want to hear is to listen. There are many reasons to learn to listen: you learn more, show respect to others, better prepare yourself for the future, and stay alert to the information you need to perform better on a daily (even hourly) basis. I’m sure you have heard the saying, “"The reason that we have two ears and one mouth," the Greek philosopher, Zeno, said, "is that we may listen the more and talk the less."
The eighth message kids don’t want to hear is to be yourself. There is a great deal of pressure as a child to be like everyone else (to fit in), or to try to make yourself into something or someone you are not. This doesn’t mean you don’t obey the rules and listen to your parents and friends. What it means is to let your creativity and your uniqueness be revealed. Don’t stifle what is naturally, comfortably, and genuinely you.
The ninth message kids don’t want to hear is: Always look on the bright side. It is easy to view the problems of this world, the difficulties of your society, the problems of your family and friends, and the troubles you face on a daily basis and become sad and depressed. The fact is, you are lucky to be alive, lucky to live in this world, society and community, and fortunate to have family and friends. If you are patient you will find that your own troubles will disappear very soon, and when looked at in retrospect, you will find your problems are surprisingly minor.
The tenth message kids don’t want to hear is: Help others. When you examine your luck, talent, and gifts, your position in this society, and what you have been given, and if you viewed it all in comparison with so many others in this world, you would quickly discover that you have so much to give. The more you give the more you will discover your true self.
Yes, ten messages sound like a lot, but if you show these messages to any adult, he or she will tell you 1) they are sound and true, 2) they will make you a better person, 3) they will help us all improve our society, and it is likely he or she will come up with one, two, or even three of their own messages not discussed here. Try it; you’ll love the results you get!
At Positive Path Network (Life by choice — not by chance) Michael Grose has written an essay entitled, “ Life Messages - Five Messages To Give Your Kids Every Day” that is relevant to mine. His include, “I care for you,” “You are unique,” “You can handle life’s difficulties,” “You choose how you think, feel, and behave,” and “There is no feeling so bad that you can’t talk about it.”
The entire purpose of PrevNet (Promoting Relationships and Eliminating Violence) is “to stop the use of power and aggression in relationships and to promote safe and healthy relationships,” and the three messages are, “Bullying is wrong and hurtful,” “Bullying is a relationship problem,” and “Promoting Relationships and Eliminating Violence are Everybody’s Responsibility.”
Contact Richard L. Weaver II
You Rules - Caution: Contents leads to a better life! is on track for release November 1st. What happened to You Rules!: All you need for Self Improvement? After seeing the proof of the first version the "guts" had only minor changes. However, the cover was sorely in need of self improvement.
What do you think of the new cover? Post a comment and tell us if we're heading in the right direction.
Cover comparison: Old You rules book cover
Our website name has changed. Our new website name is: YouRules.com. We have added full chapters of the book so you can "try before you buy"... and don't worry, if you happen to click a link to our old website you will still find us.
The new You Rules - Caution: Contents leads to a better life proof is due in the next couple weeks... We're excited!
Thursday’s essay, “Ten Messages Kids Don’t Want to Hear,” is an essay for the kids of the world. There isn’t a child in the world who would not benefit by reading this essay or having it read to him or her by a concerned parent or adult.
Share your And Then Some Story about raising kids. What is your role in dealing with kids? How successful have you been? Can you tell us in what capacity you have dealt with them? When it comes to other people having to deal with kids, what would be YOUR message to them? What would be your message(s) to kids? Can you share your tips, stories, or suggestions regarding kids (raising them, teaching them, or dealing with them in any capacity)? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who has had success or is a complete failure in dealing with kids? Can you tell his or her story? Feel free to use a pseudonym for the person’ real name.
Click here to share your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
Ten Messages Kids Don’t Want to Hear
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Yes, ten messages sound like a lot, but if you show these messages to any adult, he or she will tell you 1) they are sound and true, 2) they will make you a better person, 3) they will help us all improve our society, and it is likely he or she will come up with one, two, or even three of their own messages not discussed here. Try it; you’ll love the results you get!
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
I have always been fascinated by authors, even put them on a pedestal. In my mind they possessed knowledge, ideas, and wisdom that exceeded those of ordinary mortals. And when I was asked in 1973, by Dr. Saundra Hybels, to write a textbook with her, I thought that I possessed nothing at all that satisfied my conception of what an author should be. I was neither trained sufficiently nor at the proper career stage—four years out of graduate school—to merit such an anointment, and yet I was brazen and cavalier enough to agree to do it.
Since then, the textbook I wrote with Hybels is in its tenth edition (eight with its current publishing company and two with a prior publisher), another textbook has seen eight editions, another one, three editions, and several others one apiece. There have been close to one hundred academic articles, numerous chapters in books, and more than a dozen published speeches and the same number of published essays. I chronicle these events not so much to convince readers that I am, indeed, a writer but more to convince myself. It is the same problem I mentioned in the first paragraph: at what point do you have the knowledge, ideas, and wisdom to think of yourself as a writer?
There have been a number of influences in my development as a writer. Although I can credit my mother for her interest in and support of her son and his small writing efforts, and I certainly can acknowledge all my English teachers, and I must always note the contribution of my dissertation advisor, one influence—drilled into my consciousness as a graduate student at Indiana University—had to be the “publish or perish” conundrum [a perplexing thing] that I was told would be, like it or not, my Holy Grail—the sacred cup from which I would sup—if teaching in higher education ended up as my profession. “Publish or perish” has the power to both motivate and persuade—and it did. “Publish or perish” remained perplexing just as long as I had nothing to offer to satisfy its glutenous appetite.
I have no negative feelings whatever about the pressure to publish work constantly in order to further or sustain a career in academia. It was that pressure that made me competitive when it came to acquiring a tenure-track faculty position, and frequent publication, too, was my route to improving my visibility within the speech-communication field. I was fully aware that instructing undergraduates alone—although I dearly loved teaching—would automatically place me out of contention for available tenure-track positions, but I never felt this was wrong nor an unjust weighting of what was required to survive in academe: it was clear from the outset.
A couple of things occurred during my years as an academic writer that have influenced me to this day. First, to write academically required that I read academic books, journals, and articles. There was no way I could publish my own insights and research without knowing what else was going on in the field—and how it was being reported. Thus, my reading has always been confined to nonfiction, first out of necessity and then out of choice (maybe habit).
In whatever field or genre you choose, you have to discover what to say as well as how to say it, and that takes time.
Second, I had to follow the form and structure of academic writers. For me this was a difficult prospect since I had to publish academic articles because of the “publish or perish” dictum, and early in my career I began writing textbooks. Textbooks had to meet academic standards, of course, since it was my faculty colleagues who made the choice to use my textbooks. At the same time, however, they had to be written for students (non-academics), because if students did not find them approachable and readable, they would not only set them aside, but they would make it clear to their professors they did not like the textbook. I have always found this dichotomy difficult: how academic is too academic, or how unacademic is too pedestrian?
The way I made the distinction between writing academically and writing textbooks can best be illustrated in the difference between the way you write and the way you talk. Writing tends to be more formal; speaking tends to be informal. Written text tends to be more dense, with careful organization, and more complex language structures. Spoken language has simpler constructions with repetition and rephrasing—and it sounds spontaneous and natural.
What the “publish or perish” pressure did for me was to establish a habit of writing. It secured an approach to my discipline (and to life in general) that had me always on the lookout for new, interesting, and challenging ideas to write about. This willingness to be observant and constant awareness of and alertness to surroundings are important qualities for writers.
What many who aspire to be writers may not realize is that writing is often lonely and isolating. Writing is hungry for both time and emotional energy when some might rather be using both in other ways. There are days when you would like a life, when you would rather stop and find something else to do, or when you just want to throw your hands up in frustration and say, “I give up, that’s it, no more!”
Another aspect of writing many aspiring writers may not want to hear is that it is hard work. Some would prefer doing the research and not the writing. Some may even just want the title, “I’m a writer,” and do none of the work it takes to be a writer. One writer even said, “Oh to just ‘be a writer’ and ride along from speaking engagement to book club. Too bad I have to write in order to call myself one.” Often it isn’t the writing itself that is so difficult, it’s the tightening it up, then tightening it up again that draws all the fun from it. This is when it becomes hard, hard work.
Most writers have always wanted to write, felt compelled to express themselves, and wanted to make a difference in the world by inspiring, entertaining, or otherwise affecting their readers. Writing, for me, fulfills a need. Although it can be lonely at times, at others it can be terribly exciting. Because it exposes me when I write, it takes courage, and each time I sit down to do it, I overcome my insecurities, experience an emotional release, and enjoy my irresistible compulsion.
At allycarter.com, there is a great essay entitled, “101 Tips on being a writer,” by Ally Carter who is the author of the Gallagher Girls series. If you want to know how to start, or what to do, or how to prepare, this is a great essay.
Craig Harper discusses prospective writers to write from the heart, be prolific, let people see your personality, plan, use a thesaurus and dictionary, have an ideas book, don’t be a chicken, ask for feedback, and read your material back to yourself. This is a worthwhile essay.
Contact Richard L. Weaver II
Thursday’s essay, “On Being a Writer — An Irresistible Compulsion,” is a personal essay that focuses on writing and, specifically, my writing career.
Share your And Then Some Story about writing. For how many years have you been involved in writing? How successful are you or were you? Can you tell us where your impulse to write originated? When it comes to other people wanting to be writers, what would be YOUR message to them? Can you share your tips, stories, or suggestions regarding writing? We would love to hear your story. Do you have a friend, a family member, a neighbor, or someone you just know from a distance who is or has been a writer? Can you tell his or her story? Feel free to use a pseudonym for the person’ real name.
Click here to share your And Then Some storyThursday's And Then Some Essay preview
On Being a Writer — An Irresistible Compulsion
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
What many who aspire to be writers may not realize is that writing is often lonely and isolating. Writing is hungry for both time and emotional energy when some might rather be using both in other ways. There are days when you would like a life, when you would rather stop and find something else to do, or when you just want to throw your hands up in frustration and say, “I give up, that’s it, no more!”
And Then Some Works - see you THURSDAY!!
by Richard L. Weaver II
Financial rewards, increased knowledge, and social contacts may be some of the obvious benefits of getting a college education, but there are numerous benefits that are not so obvious and which may, indeed, be overlooked when students and parents make their decisions about either going to college or not. For many, it is these benefits that make the cost, time commitment, and energy worthwhile. I call these the hidden benefits of a college education.
Often, students who enter college do so with a specific idea about what they want to study, and what they want to be when their education is complete. There is nothing wrong with this kind of focus, and, for many, it offers precisely the direction they need to make the most of their college education. When I said, above, “there is nothing wrong with this kind of focus,” perhaps I should add, “if you maintain an open mind and flexibility.”
There is so much more to college life than classes, subject disciplines, and majors. I will label this “so much more”: exposure. Many students think they know exactly what courses provide, instructors dispense, and experiences deliver and, yet, it is the hidden benefits that often surprise — even astonish. “I had no idea,” is a common statement made by those who have entered the ivy walls with an open mind and flexibility.
The “exposure” comes from other classes — outside of one’s major — often, the required courses themselves. The “exposure” comes from the different instructors and how they choose to present their material, explore various approaches, and challenge their students. The “exposure” comes, too, from how students interpret, assimilate, and absorb the information. It is this unique juxtaposition of subject matter, presentation, and interpretation that cannot be predicted and, yet, can yield such incredible results.
When the focus of college is on awareness and the introduction of new ideas and new insights, one cannot escape being fascinated — even captivated . That’s where the open mind and flexibility come in. Instructors do not ask that students accept — unless it is on a temporary (for class purposes) basis — but they do want them to listen, concentrate, and consider. It is not about indoctrination, although some people may see it that way — as much as it is about weighing and considering. It is the development of good thinking, reasoning, and decision-making skills. And to develop these in the best manner means giving students something worthwhile, different, and challenging to think about. It means helping them break out from their limited and personal, often traditional, stereotypical, commonplace, and rigid kinds of thinking and reacting. It means getting them out of the boxes they may not even know they are in and getting them to investigate new boxes they didn’t even know existed. This promotes tolerance and open-mindedness.
Another hidden benefit of a college education is communication, whether it be written, spoken, or nonverbal. College offers opportunities to record reactions, write papers, and prepare reports. At times, some of these “opportunities” seem to be busy work on the way to getting a degree. And yet, confirmed in many studies that have been completed, accurate, effective communication is one of the greatest weaknesses in the workplace. Every opportunity to record one’s thoughts and reactions in writing should be grasped as another chance to formulate thoughts, shape ideas, and structure impressions. To have trained, knowledgeable, authorities assisting students to better express themselves should be accepted as a rare and unique gift designed to make them more effective.
Oral communication is not totally different from written. Even though many students feel they are already talented speakers — after all, they have been talking since they were born — few are as effective as they think. Speech communication courses compel students to examine the basics of effective communication: skillful listening, adept use of words, useful methods for supporting opinions, adroit patterns for organizing thoughts, as well as powerful ways for expressing them.
There are hidden, underlying benefits of speech-communication courses as well. First, think about the breadth and depth of ideas exposed to because of the speeches of others. Second, think about the critiques, evaluations, and assessments. Imagine the opportunities students have not just for comparing their efforts with others, but for projecting (internally, of course) specific methods for self-improvement because of the work they see others present. There are an overwhelming array of possibilities for making great strides in their personal ability to grow, change, and develop.
There are nonverbal communication benefits of a college education as well. These can occur on a personal basis with friends, relationship partners, and other students as they interact on a daily and continuing basis. And it isn’t just their talking to others, but also it is the reactions they receive to what they project. They have unrestrained opportunities to test the way they communicate, make changes, and develop their repertoire of reactions and responses.
In the communication classroom, focus on nonverbal communication is a natural part of the evaluations and critiques students receive. For the shy, performance opportunities often serve to bring them out of their shells. For the more natural, it gives them a chance to perfect, hone, and polish their abilities — concentrated practice with critiques that offer suggestions for improvement and development.
Another important hidden benefit of a college education is growth in self-esteem. You could say, “But, that happens naturally outside the ivy walls,” and you are correct; however, when you are regularly challenged with new ideas, when you are often forced to think and solve problems, when your communication abilities are pressured to grow rapidly, and when you are surrounded by a compelling, nurturing, and encouraging environment precisely constructed to improve your self-esteem, you cannot escape development and maturity.
There are many other hidden benefits, of course, and the acquisition of words is certainly one of them. With increased vocabulary, it is easier to put your thoughts into words, to articulate your ideas and, even more important, to express precisely what you intend. When you hear about the benefits of college — increased financial rewards, knowledge, and social contacts — you seldom hear about the hidden benefits of exposure, communication, self-esteem, and vocabulary, but these may even be more important to your success, future life, and happiness.
“Multiplying college benefits for everybody,” is an essay written by Jay Matthews, a Washington Post Staff Writer. Matthews adds an important ingredient to those I’ve discussed in the essay and that is the effect a college education may have on other family members as well as the value of open-enrollment policies. Matthews writes an outstanding essay with important information.
Kathleen Porter has written an essay entitled “The Value of a college degree,” in which she presents the economic value first, and then discusses many of the other benefits. Porter supports her essay with 10 reputable references. This is another worthwhile essay.
Contact Richard L. Weaver II
