"Nobody talks much that doesn't say unwise things --- things he did not mean to say; as no person plays much without striking a false note sometimes." ---Oliver Wendell Holmes
Friday, December 18, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Are you a good decision maker? Are you in charge of your life?
by Richard L. Weaver II
When I was in college I had to make a decision that would alter my entire life — whether to change from a pre-med to a speech-communication major. While I was dating my wife, we had to decide whether to continue our relationship or get married. When I was teaching college, I had to decide, at the request of a colleague, whether I wanted to co-write a textbook with her. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Although these were three momentous ones — and the answer in each case was to accept the new option — most decisions are not as weighty.
Every time we turn around, we have to make more decisions. Just as people are different, so are their styles of decision making. Are you a good decision maker? The problem with this question is simply that it is difficult to assess — objectively — your own decision-making ability. There is no doubt that some people find this particular skill easier than others, but the good news is that decision-making is a skill that can be learned by anyone.
Wise decisions are those made using a definite process. Why? First, because they are based on the values and perceptions of the decision-maker. Second, because they take advantage of carefully considered alternatives and options. And three, because they include periodic reassessments of the decision and its effects.
Many people resist the claim that a definite process is essential to wise decision making. They claim, instead, that making decisions simply by intuition is a superior method. They trust their “gut feelings” more than they trust any specific method, model, or process.
There is no doubt about the utility of snap judgments. Students, for example, know from the first few seconds of class whether a teacher is good or not. People size up others and situations from their gut — often, too, with ample emotional intelligence. And, too, emergency situations require instantaneous gut reaction — what to do to avoid a collision or catastrophe, for example. Operating on instinct keeps everything simple and clear.
But there are serious limitations to intuition when practiced without the interference of facts. Snap judgments are hardly infallible. On first impressions, for example, Warren Harding looked like a real president but turned out to be one of the worst ever. The decision to go to war in Iraq was made with no formal meetings to weigh the pros and cons. It felt right at the time. Choosing to take an economics course instead of one in computer science is likely to be based solely on an emotional reaction. But when your core values trump facts, you are likely to lose touch with reality as well as the needs for cautiousness and deliberation.
The opposite of making decisions based on intuition is not gathering huge amounts of information before making laborious decisions based on detailed knowledge and thorough analysis of a subject. That can become paralysis by analysis. Actually, the opposite of making decisions based on intuition involves following a strategy that is less likely to lead to common errors in reasoning. Two common errors involve, first, subconsciously deciding what you want to do before figuring out why you want to do it. The second is the inclination to be more engaged by things you like than by things you dislike.
What guidelines are likely to improve your decision making? What methods are likely to put you in control of your life? The first guideline is to define the problem. Using input from both yourself and others, try to understand the causes that make you think there’s a problem. When, where, how, why, and with whom is it happening? Try to address the issue rather than the people, but the more narrowly the problem can be defined, the more likely it can be approached and resolved. Trying to make a decision, for example, about changing professions is an important one, but if the problem is narrowed to whether or not you want to accept a new job offer, it might be easier to deal with the questions of when, where, how, why, and with whom.
The second guideline is to look at potential causes for the problem. Once you realize how much you don’t know about what you don’t know, you will realize the importance of getting input from other people and gathering as much information as you can. When people make a decision to go on a cruise, it may seem to be an easy one to make based on whether or not they can afford it. But the decision gets more complicated when the cost of transportation to and from the cruise departure point is factored in, the possible need for a new wardrobe and other accessories, and the cost of tipping cruise-ship employees is counted. Missing important family events may even need to be considered.
The third guideline is to identify alternatives for approaches to resolve the problem. When students consider going to college, for example, a major consideration is living arrangements. Brainstorming with others — collecting as many ideas as possible without judging them and then screening them to find the best idea — may include some creative ideas no single person could imagine. Living at home and commuting, dormitories, and apartments are common solutions, but co-ops, living with another family, or even purchasing — along with several others—an inexpensive home or condominium might be alternatives.
The fourth guideline is to select an approach to resolve the problem. Look for long term, realistic, affordable solutions that you have enough time and resources to implement. The fourth guideline flows easily into the fifth, which is to plan the implementation. A key question is, “What will the situation look like when the problem is solved?” Specifically plan the steps that need to be taken to implement the best alternative. What systems or processes need to be changed to accommodate the new policy, procedure, or approach? How will you know if the steps are being followed, and what resources are needed.
The sixth and seventh guidelines include monitoring the implementation of the plan to see if you are getting what you expect. Will the plan be done according to schedule? Is there any need for a change in the plan? Finally, verify if the problem has been resolved or not? What changes should be made to avoid this type of problem in the future? What did you learn from this situation? Was there new knowledge? Understanding? Skills?
Only by making rational decisions will you take charge of your life. The point of having guidelines in place is to avoid making decisions sloppily, by default, or from the gut. Guidelines, too, will help you avoid irrational ideas, false assumptions, fear, needs, and other emotions that block good decision-making.
Finally, having guidelines will reduce the level of stress you will experience when faced with having to make decisions. You don’t ignore your intuition. There is no question that our bodies provide clues to the right decisions through our feelings and gut reactions. But, you aren’t a slave to it; you simply use it to inform, enlighten, and, perhaps, reinforce (add information to) your rational decision-making processes. Good decision making means following a step-by-step pattern.
-----
At Ezine@rticles.com, Daniel Teayagu has a useful, practical, brief essay entitled, “How to be a good decision maker,” with five specific suggestions or guidelines.
“Becoming a Better Decision Maker,” is an excellent website that suggests that if readers “follow these ten basic steps, you will find yourself making wiser decisions, both in your professional as well as your personal life.” After discussing the ten steps, the site offers “a list of the most common decision-making mistakes. By learning about these pitfalls now, you will be able to avoid them in the future.
-----
Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
When I was in college I had to make a decision that would alter my entire life — whether to change from a pre-med to a speech-communication major. While I was dating my wife, we had to decide whether to continue our relationship or get married. When I was teaching college, I had to decide, at the request of a colleague, whether I wanted to co-write a textbook with her. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Although these were three momentous ones — and the answer in each case was to accept the new option — most decisions are not as weighty.
Every time we turn around, we have to make more decisions. Just as people are different, so are their styles of decision making. Are you a good decision maker? The problem with this question is simply that it is difficult to assess — objectively — your own decision-making ability. There is no doubt that some people find this particular skill easier than others, but the good news is that decision-making is a skill that can be learned by anyone.
Wise decisions are those made using a definite process. Why? First, because they are based on the values and perceptions of the decision-maker. Second, because they take advantage of carefully considered alternatives and options. And three, because they include periodic reassessments of the decision and its effects.
Many people resist the claim that a definite process is essential to wise decision making. They claim, instead, that making decisions simply by intuition is a superior method. They trust their “gut feelings” more than they trust any specific method, model, or process.
There is no doubt about the utility of snap judgments. Students, for example, know from the first few seconds of class whether a teacher is good or not. People size up others and situations from their gut — often, too, with ample emotional intelligence. And, too, emergency situations require instantaneous gut reaction — what to do to avoid a collision or catastrophe, for example. Operating on instinct keeps everything simple and clear.
But there are serious limitations to intuition when practiced without the interference of facts. Snap judgments are hardly infallible. On first impressions, for example, Warren Harding looked like a real president but turned out to be one of the worst ever. The decision to go to war in Iraq was made with no formal meetings to weigh the pros and cons. It felt right at the time. Choosing to take an economics course instead of one in computer science is likely to be based solely on an emotional reaction. But when your core values trump facts, you are likely to lose touch with reality as well as the needs for cautiousness and deliberation.
The opposite of making decisions based on intuition is not gathering huge amounts of information before making laborious decisions based on detailed knowledge and thorough analysis of a subject. That can become paralysis by analysis. Actually, the opposite of making decisions based on intuition involves following a strategy that is less likely to lead to common errors in reasoning. Two common errors involve, first, subconsciously deciding what you want to do before figuring out why you want to do it. The second is the inclination to be more engaged by things you like than by things you dislike.
What guidelines are likely to improve your decision making? What methods are likely to put you in control of your life? The first guideline is to define the problem. Using input from both yourself and others, try to understand the causes that make you think there’s a problem. When, where, how, why, and with whom is it happening? Try to address the issue rather than the people, but the more narrowly the problem can be defined, the more likely it can be approached and resolved. Trying to make a decision, for example, about changing professions is an important one, but if the problem is narrowed to whether or not you want to accept a new job offer, it might be easier to deal with the questions of when, where, how, why, and with whom.
The second guideline is to look at potential causes for the problem. Once you realize how much you don’t know about what you don’t know, you will realize the importance of getting input from other people and gathering as much information as you can. When people make a decision to go on a cruise, it may seem to be an easy one to make based on whether or not they can afford it. But the decision gets more complicated when the cost of transportation to and from the cruise departure point is factored in, the possible need for a new wardrobe and other accessories, and the cost of tipping cruise-ship employees is counted. Missing important family events may even need to be considered.
The third guideline is to identify alternatives for approaches to resolve the problem. When students consider going to college, for example, a major consideration is living arrangements. Brainstorming with others — collecting as many ideas as possible without judging them and then screening them to find the best idea — may include some creative ideas no single person could imagine. Living at home and commuting, dormitories, and apartments are common solutions, but co-ops, living with another family, or even purchasing — along with several others—an inexpensive home or condominium might be alternatives.
The fourth guideline is to select an approach to resolve the problem. Look for long term, realistic, affordable solutions that you have enough time and resources to implement. The fourth guideline flows easily into the fifth, which is to plan the implementation. A key question is, “What will the situation look like when the problem is solved?” Specifically plan the steps that need to be taken to implement the best alternative. What systems or processes need to be changed to accommodate the new policy, procedure, or approach? How will you know if the steps are being followed, and what resources are needed.
The sixth and seventh guidelines include monitoring the implementation of the plan to see if you are getting what you expect. Will the plan be done according to schedule? Is there any need for a change in the plan? Finally, verify if the problem has been resolved or not? What changes should be made to avoid this type of problem in the future? What did you learn from this situation? Was there new knowledge? Understanding? Skills?
Only by making rational decisions will you take charge of your life. The point of having guidelines in place is to avoid making decisions sloppily, by default, or from the gut. Guidelines, too, will help you avoid irrational ideas, false assumptions, fear, needs, and other emotions that block good decision-making.
Finally, having guidelines will reduce the level of stress you will experience when faced with having to make decisions. You don’t ignore your intuition. There is no question that our bodies provide clues to the right decisions through our feelings and gut reactions. But, you aren’t a slave to it; you simply use it to inform, enlighten, and, perhaps, reinforce (add information to) your rational decision-making processes. Good decision making means following a step-by-step pattern.
-----
At Ezine@rticles.com, Daniel Teayagu has a useful, practical, brief essay entitled, “How to be a good decision maker,” with five specific suggestions or guidelines.
“Becoming a Better Decision Maker,” is an excellent website that suggests that if readers “follow these ten basic steps, you will find yourself making wiser decisions, both in your professional as well as your personal life.” After discussing the ten steps, the site offers “a list of the most common decision-making mistakes. By learning about these pitfalls now, you will be able to avoid them in the future.
-----
Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about." ---Benjamin Lee Whorf
Day #110 - Take care in the language you choose to use.
Day #110 - Take care in the language you choose to use.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “‘Are you a good decision maker? Are you in charge of your life? ” We all make decisions, and we make them all the time; however, when it comes to the important decisions in our lives, the way we make those decisions can have significant and long-lasting consequences. Test yourself; do you make good decisions. Whether you do or not will determine whether you are in charge of your life.
Share your link. Have you written anything about making decisions? Have you discovered a way for making good decisions — and knowing they are good? Do you know someone who is a really good decision maker? Can you share some insights about how to make decisions and how to test if they are good? What would you like to tell people about decision making? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Are you a good decision maker? Are you in charge of your life?
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Only by making rational decisions will you take charge of your life. The point of having guidelines in place is to avoid making decisions sloppily, by default, or from the gut. Guidelines, too, will help you avoid irrational ideas, false assumptions, fear, needs, and other emotions that block good decision-making. Finally, having guidelines will reduce the level of stress you will experience when faced with having to make decisions. You don’t ignore your intuition. There is no question that our bodies provide clues to the right decisions through our feelings and gut reactions. But, you aren’t a slave to it; you simply use it to inform, enlighten, and, perhaps, reinforce (add information to) your rational decision-making processes. Good decision making means following a step-by-step pattern.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about making decisions? Have you discovered a way for making good decisions — and knowing they are good? Do you know someone who is a really good decision maker? Can you share some insights about how to make decisions and how to test if they are good? What would you like to tell people about decision making? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Are you a good decision maker? Are you in charge of your life?
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Only by making rational decisions will you take charge of your life. The point of having guidelines in place is to avoid making decisions sloppily, by default, or from the gut. Guidelines, too, will help you avoid irrational ideas, false assumptions, fear, needs, and other emotions that block good decision-making. Finally, having guidelines will reduce the level of stress you will experience when faced with having to make decisions. You don’t ignore your intuition. There is no question that our bodies provide clues to the right decisions through our feelings and gut reactions. But, you aren’t a slave to it; you simply use it to inform, enlighten, and, perhaps, reinforce (add information to) your rational decision-making processes. Good decision making means following a step-by-step pattern.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Book Review Mondays
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by Kevin Rivoli, artwork by Norman Rockwell
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
Rivoli is a photojournalist “who has photographed everyone from professional sports stars to presidents. But his favorite subjects have always been ordinary people doing ordinary things” (from the back page of the book jacket). Ordinary people are the focus for his camera in this volume, and how he matches images with Rockwell’s art is intriguing and ingenious. Rockwell’s artwork is iconic, and Rivoli’s photography is not just outstanding, it is stunning. He successfully captures the spirit of Rockwell’s America. Jimmy Moore ended his very positive review of the book saying: “Norman Rockwell's paintings are like Elvis Presley's music. The older it gets, the more you appreciate the magnitude of the brilliance that makes it timeless. THANK YOU Kevin Rivoli for reminding us that the American spirit that Normal Rockwell portrayed so clearly is alive and well today!” And I would just like to add a second “thank you” to the one by Moore. This volume makes a perfect “coffee-table book,” and if you decide to buy it as a gift for someone or just for yourself, I will bet that anyone — and I mean anyone — who happens to see it, will want to turn its pages. It is truly a treasure that will be enjoyed for years and years.
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by Tamara Lowe
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
If you are looking for a book to get you going, choose this one. This is a readable, accessible, and specific book about motivation — “how you can motivate yourself and others, quickly and easily” (p. 5). Lowe’s work, as she states it, “is based on an eight-year study that [her] team . . . have conducted with more than 10,000 people. It is a research-based, systematic approach to achievement . . .” (p. 5). What Lowe and her team of researchers discovered is “that there are eighty-one specific things that people say motivate them — everything from love to money, from curiosity to contribution, from feeling valued to the fear of failure. By reducing these motivators to their most fundamental form, [she] discovered six factors that actually encompass all eighty-one motivators” (p. 11). Lowe’s book discusses motivational DNA, and the DNA stand for drives, needs, and awards: “Drives are the internal forces that mobilize a person to act.” “Needs are the core requirements that a person must have in order to feel fulfilled.” “Awards are the preferred remunerations that a person desires for achievement — the material, spiritual, and psychological currency that they want to be paid for performance” (p. 16). Her questionnaire in Chapter 2, and the way the results are interpreted (in the same chapter) reminded me a bit of the Wilson Learning testing and results. They appear sound, well-reasoned, and easy (and fun) to apply. I was skeptical when I began this book, because I have read dozens on the subject of motivation, but I was both surprised and appreciative of the work that Lowe has done and the way she has presented it to readers. If you want a serious (as opposed to frivolous) book on motivation, this one is truly worthwhile.
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Through our reading, researching, and writing, And Then Some Publishing (and our extended family of readers) mine volumes of books representing a wide variety of tastes. We use the books in our writing, test and try suggested techniques, and we read for enjoyment as well. We wouldn't spend the time reviewing the books if we didn't get something out of it. Read more reviews on other fantastic books at our BookWorksRules.com website.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Keys to finding happiness
by Richard L. Weaver II
I have never been in search of happiness. Fortunately, for me and for members of my family (and extended family as well), happiness has been a characteristic most others associate with or attach to any description they give of any of us. That doesn’t mean we never have periods of unhappiness, live through times of depression, or experience sadness, sorrow, and dejection. We grieve, get upset, and get discouraged like everyone else; however, when one examines our overall temperament, mood, and spirit, it is truly buoyant, cheerful, and optimistic.
“Happy people keep a positive attitude by gracefully accepting sadness and suffering as normal parts of life, while doing what they can about their problems,” says Chuck T. Falcon at HealthyPlace.com — to be referred to later.
I recognize the good fortune of our family. Whether it is luck, genetic good-fortune, or the environment in which we live, it doesn’t matter; we tend to be happy people. And we recognize, at the same time, there are many in this world much less fortunate than we are. If I had just one suggestion — not nearly enough for some, it is true — it would be: When you think a negative thought, simply counter that thought with at least three positive thoughts. It's really that simple. You simply overwhelm it and, thus, overcome it, because when you control your thoughts you control your life.
“Your mind does not know the difference between the good and the bad thoughts that you put in it. It only knows to take in everything that you send it and store it and then what you dwell on allows your mind to begin the manifestation of your dominant thoughts.” This quotation comes from the website EzineArticles, in an essay by Delton Doucet entitled, “Negative Thoughts Negative Results.”
At the website, The Side Road, practical advice straight from the experts, Mary Ann Troiani has an essay entitled, “The Key To Happiness: Learning How To Be Optimistic And Happy,” in which she characterizes happiness as a learned skill.
In her essay Troiani offers “5 essentials to be ultra-motivated.” 1) You can only have one thought at a time, thus, concentrate on what you want to accomplish, 2) Expect the best by holding the belief that you will succeed, 3) Strong ambition. Here, Troiani says, “The finest way to develop strong ambition is for you to think about your goals, ambitions and things you want many, many times each day.” 4) Gumption to change how you think. “...Seize your opportunity to do things a bit differently.” and 5) Persistence. Troiani writes, “Fascinating research done at Stanford University proves that persistent people achieve more than their less persistent colleagues.” A large study of children found those with persistence exhibit the following additional characteristics: assertive, confident, likely to pursue challenges, able to handle frustration, likely not to give up when encountering obstacles, and willing to start and complete projects. These are characteristics which, when exhibited early, are likely to continue throughout one’s life.
One of the primary ways to find happiness is to develop interests and activities. “Interests and activities are very important in mental health, contributing to self-esteem and happiness. They give satisfaction, help make you feel good about yourself, and keep your mind off problems and negative thoughts and emotions. Simply cultivating them can sometimes cure depression, grief, addiction, explosive anger, anxiety, excessive worrying, or guilt, especially if you do the activities whenever you feel the negative emotion.” At HealthyPlace.com, in an essay, “Overcoming Depression and Finding Happiness,” Chuck T. Falcon, a counseling psychologist wrote these words about finding interests and activities.
At LifeOrganizer, Donald Latumahina has a wonderful essay, “Finding Happiness: 20 Ways to Achieve Happiness in Life,” who supports the contention, “your happiness is your responsibility.” The twenty suggestions are short, specific, and easy to understand, and I repeat them here because of their value and worth: 1) Stop comparing yourself with others, 2) Count your blessings, 3) Find your inner voice, 4) Reconnect with your childhood dreams, 5) Help someone, 6) Spend more time with loved ones, 7) Apply the five languages of love (words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch) 8) appreciate nature, 9) pray or meditate, 10) Know yourself, 11) Say thank you, 12) Smile, 13) Listen more than you speak, 14) Stop judging others, 15) Focus on what you can control, 16) Forgive yourself, 17) Forgive others, 18) Accept yourself, 19) Know how to deal with problems, 20) Be a promise keeper.
At the website zenhabits, the essay there, “A Guide to Escaping Materialism and Finding Happiness,” offers nine delightful suggestions for finding happiness: 1) Grateful list. Make a list of things about which you’re grateful in your life. Give thanks for them daily. 2) Think positive. Try eliminating negative thinking from your life, and thinking positive instead. 3) Small pleasures. Make a list of small things that give you great pleasure. Sprinkle them throughout your day. 4) Kindness. Practice random acts of kindness and compassion. Do it anonymously. Help those in need. Volunteer. Make someone smile. 5) Love. Make an intimate connection with your loved ones. Develop your friendships. Spend time with them, converse, understand them, make them happy. 6) Health. Exercise and eat healthy — it sounds trite, but it can bring great happiness to your life. 7) Meaning. It’s often useful to find meaning, either through a church or spiritual way, or through those we love in life or through the things we’re passionate about. Give yourself a purpose.
8) Flow. Eliminate distractions, and really pour yourself into whatever you’re doing. If it’s writing an article, like this one, really put yourself into it, until you forget the outside world. 9) Know yourself. Become attuned to what brings you happiness. Study yourself. Learn about what you love, and about your ability to love. Increase your capacity for compassion.
Happiness is a learned skill. The suggestions here are practical, worthwhile, and useful. If you learned them, accepted them, and applied them to your life, you would — without a doubt — find happiness.
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At Anxieties.com, the excellent essay, “Stopping the negative oberserver,” offers five ideas for handling worries as “noise”: 1. Listen for your worried, self-critical, or hopeless thoughts. 2. Decide that you want to stop them. ("Are these thoughts helping me?") 3. Reinforce your decision through supportive comments ("I can let go of these thoughts.") 4. Mentally yell "stop!" (Snap rubber band on wrist.) 5. Begin Calming Counts.
At the News Blaze website, the essay by Michael Torchia, “How Negative Thinking Has Programmed US to Make Poor Choices,” Torchia makes a number of suggestions for change. He ends his essay saying: “Pay attention to that little voice in your head. It will keep you from making the wrong decisions. Don't override these warnings and force things to happen. Let your life choices come naturally.”
The website referred to in the essay HealthyPlace.com, and the essay there, “Overcoming Depression and Finding Happiness,” by Chuck T. Falcon, a counseling psychologist, is worth a read for its depth, discussion, and practical suggestions.
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Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L. C.
I have never been in search of happiness. Fortunately, for me and for members of my family (and extended family as well), happiness has been a characteristic most others associate with or attach to any description they give of any of us. That doesn’t mean we never have periods of unhappiness, live through times of depression, or experience sadness, sorrow, and dejection. We grieve, get upset, and get discouraged like everyone else; however, when one examines our overall temperament, mood, and spirit, it is truly buoyant, cheerful, and optimistic.
“Happy people keep a positive attitude by gracefully accepting sadness and suffering as normal parts of life, while doing what they can about their problems,” says Chuck T. Falcon at HealthyPlace.com — to be referred to later.
I recognize the good fortune of our family. Whether it is luck, genetic good-fortune, or the environment in which we live, it doesn’t matter; we tend to be happy people. And we recognize, at the same time, there are many in this world much less fortunate than we are. If I had just one suggestion — not nearly enough for some, it is true — it would be: When you think a negative thought, simply counter that thought with at least three positive thoughts. It's really that simple. You simply overwhelm it and, thus, overcome it, because when you control your thoughts you control your life.
“Your mind does not know the difference between the good and the bad thoughts that you put in it. It only knows to take in everything that you send it and store it and then what you dwell on allows your mind to begin the manifestation of your dominant thoughts.” This quotation comes from the website EzineArticles, in an essay by Delton Doucet entitled, “Negative Thoughts Negative Results.”
At the website, The Side Road, practical advice straight from the experts, Mary Ann Troiani has an essay entitled, “The Key To Happiness: Learning How To Be Optimistic And Happy,” in which she characterizes happiness as a learned skill.
In her essay Troiani offers “5 essentials to be ultra-motivated.” 1) You can only have one thought at a time, thus, concentrate on what you want to accomplish, 2) Expect the best by holding the belief that you will succeed, 3) Strong ambition. Here, Troiani says, “The finest way to develop strong ambition is for you to think about your goals, ambitions and things you want many, many times each day.” 4) Gumption to change how you think. “...Seize your opportunity to do things a bit differently.” and 5) Persistence. Troiani writes, “Fascinating research done at Stanford University proves that persistent people achieve more than their less persistent colleagues.” A large study of children found those with persistence exhibit the following additional characteristics: assertive, confident, likely to pursue challenges, able to handle frustration, likely not to give up when encountering obstacles, and willing to start and complete projects. These are characteristics which, when exhibited early, are likely to continue throughout one’s life.
One of the primary ways to find happiness is to develop interests and activities. “Interests and activities are very important in mental health, contributing to self-esteem and happiness. They give satisfaction, help make you feel good about yourself, and keep your mind off problems and negative thoughts and emotions. Simply cultivating them can sometimes cure depression, grief, addiction, explosive anger, anxiety, excessive worrying, or guilt, especially if you do the activities whenever you feel the negative emotion.” At HealthyPlace.com, in an essay, “Overcoming Depression and Finding Happiness,” Chuck T. Falcon, a counseling psychologist wrote these words about finding interests and activities.
At LifeOrganizer, Donald Latumahina has a wonderful essay, “Finding Happiness: 20 Ways to Achieve Happiness in Life,” who supports the contention, “your happiness is your responsibility.” The twenty suggestions are short, specific, and easy to understand, and I repeat them here because of their value and worth: 1) Stop comparing yourself with others, 2) Count your blessings, 3) Find your inner voice, 4) Reconnect with your childhood dreams, 5) Help someone, 6) Spend more time with loved ones, 7) Apply the five languages of love (words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch) 8) appreciate nature, 9) pray or meditate, 10) Know yourself, 11) Say thank you, 12) Smile, 13) Listen more than you speak, 14) Stop judging others, 15) Focus on what you can control, 16) Forgive yourself, 17) Forgive others, 18) Accept yourself, 19) Know how to deal with problems, 20) Be a promise keeper.
At the website zenhabits, the essay there, “A Guide to Escaping Materialism and Finding Happiness,” offers nine delightful suggestions for finding happiness: 1) Grateful list. Make a list of things about which you’re grateful in your life. Give thanks for them daily. 2) Think positive. Try eliminating negative thinking from your life, and thinking positive instead. 3) Small pleasures. Make a list of small things that give you great pleasure. Sprinkle them throughout your day. 4) Kindness. Practice random acts of kindness and compassion. Do it anonymously. Help those in need. Volunteer. Make someone smile. 5) Love. Make an intimate connection with your loved ones. Develop your friendships. Spend time with them, converse, understand them, make them happy. 6) Health. Exercise and eat healthy — it sounds trite, but it can bring great happiness to your life. 7) Meaning. It’s often useful to find meaning, either through a church or spiritual way, or through those we love in life or through the things we’re passionate about. Give yourself a purpose.
8) Flow. Eliminate distractions, and really pour yourself into whatever you’re doing. If it’s writing an article, like this one, really put yourself into it, until you forget the outside world. 9) Know yourself. Become attuned to what brings you happiness. Study yourself. Learn about what you love, and about your ability to love. Increase your capacity for compassion.
Happiness is a learned skill. The suggestions here are practical, worthwhile, and useful. If you learned them, accepted them, and applied them to your life, you would — without a doubt — find happiness.
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At Anxieties.com, the excellent essay, “Stopping the negative oberserver,” offers five ideas for handling worries as “noise”: 1. Listen for your worried, self-critical, or hopeless thoughts. 2. Decide that you want to stop them. ("Are these thoughts helping me?") 3. Reinforce your decision through supportive comments ("I can let go of these thoughts.") 4. Mentally yell "stop!" (Snap rubber band on wrist.) 5. Begin Calming Counts.
At the News Blaze website, the essay by Michael Torchia, “How Negative Thinking Has Programmed US to Make Poor Choices,” Torchia makes a number of suggestions for change. He ends his essay saying: “Pay attention to that little voice in your head. It will keep you from making the wrong decisions. Don't override these warnings and force things to happen. Let your life choices come naturally.”
The website referred to in the essay HealthyPlace.com, and the essay there, “Overcoming Depression and Finding Happiness,” by Chuck T. Falcon, a counseling psychologist, is worth a read for its depth, discussion, and practical suggestions.
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Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L. C.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools." ---Truman Capote
Day #109 - Think young: add more years to your life.
Day #109 - Think young: add more years to your life.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “‘Keys to finding happiness.” What are the keys? There are many; thus, why not offer a smorgasbord and let readers cherry pick the best from a variety of sources? This essay offers some specific, practical suggestions for finding happiness, and I hope you have as much fun reading it as I had in locating the sources for it.
Share your link. Have you written anything about finding happiness? Have you discovered a key or keys? Or, have you been on the receiving or giving end of happiness? Can you share some insights about those times when you have given or received happiness and how it feels to be on the giving or receiving end? What would you like to tell people about keys to happiness? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Keys to finding happiness
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
I recognize the good fortune of our family. Whether it is luck, genetic good-fortune, or the environment in which we live, it doesn’t matter; we tend to be happy people. And we recognize, at the same time, there are many in this world much less fortunate than we are. If I had just one suggestion — not nearly enough for some, it is true — it would be: When you think a negative thought, simply counter that thought with at least three positive thoughts. It's really that simple. You simply overwhelm it and, thus, overcome it, because when you control your thoughts you control your life.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about finding happiness? Have you discovered a key or keys? Or, have you been on the receiving or giving end of happiness? Can you share some insights about those times when you have given or received happiness and how it feels to be on the giving or receiving end? What would you like to tell people about keys to happiness? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Keys to finding happiness
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
I recognize the good fortune of our family. Whether it is luck, genetic good-fortune, or the environment in which we live, it doesn’t matter; we tend to be happy people. And we recognize, at the same time, there are many in this world much less fortunate than we are. If I had just one suggestion — not nearly enough for some, it is true — it would be: When you think a negative thought, simply counter that thought with at least three positive thoughts. It's really that simple. You simply overwhelm it and, thus, overcome it, because when you control your thoughts you control your life.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, December 7, 2009
Book Review Mondays
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by Arthur C. Brooks
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
Brooks is a professor of business and government policy at Syracuse University’s Maxwell School of Citizenship and Public Affairs and Whitman School of Management. With 32 pages of notes, Brooks does not rely on anecdotal information to make his arguments, he depends on solid research. Using engaging statistics and valuable examples, he offers an authoritative account of the social bases of happiness. There are two parts to this book: 1) The Culture of Happiness, and 2) The Economics of Happiness. Individual chapter titles will let you know if this book is for you (there are four in each part): 1) The politics of happiness, 2) Happiness is a gift from above, 3) Is happiness a family value?, 4) Staying happy in the age of freedom and insecurity. Part 2 includes: 5) Does money buy happiness?, 6) Inequality and (Un)happiness in America, 7) Happiness is a full-time job, and 8) The secret to buying happiness. Brooks says, “So at least 50 percent of one’s happiness level is a given [genetic], the product of nature. If less than half is subject to outside influence, or nurture, can an investigation of the values associated with happy people really be that useful? Is there any point to gathering this information? The answer, I believe, is ‘yes’” (p. 11). And this book supplies the content for affecting the other 50%. This is a well-written, thoroughly documented, interesting examination, that is worth your serious attention.
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by Henry Alford
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
In this 262-page book, Alford engages in a quest for the answer to the question, “What is wisdom?” — or, at the least, insights into wisdom from elderly people who he judged to possess it. After all, it has been defined, variously, as accumulated knowledge or erudition or enlightenment, the trait of utilizing knowledge and experience with common sense and insight, and the quality of being prudent and sensible; thus, you would expect older people to offer wisdom. Personally, I’ve always believed it was better to see it in results or actions rather than in expressed opinions about or insights into its meaning. You read an author, and you get a sense of how wise and sensible he or she is. You see an action or activity, like the judgments of a coach as displayed on the court, and you gain a sense of that coach’s wise advice. Alford’s pursuit, however, is instructive, interesting, and enjoyable. I would label this book, “a fun adventure.” Some of those he interviewed included Harold Bloom (in a fairly academic discussion), Edward Albee, Setuko Nishi (a sociologist who, during World War II, was put in an internment camp), Sylvia Miles (an interview and tour of pure fluff), and Phyllis Diller. Albee was quoted as saying, “Maybe [wisdom is] finally being able to figure out what you should be worrying about and what you shouldn’t be worrying about” (p. 183). I found Alford’s asides delightful, such as, “I read in William F. Buckley’s obituary that the papers the archconservative had bequeathed to Yale weighed seven tons” (p. 71). The chapters throughout are interspersed with those about his mother, a former social worker, and Will, his stepfather, one of the country’s few authroities on coal gasification. Although these stories were interesting, I was far more interested in what others had to say, although Alford’s approach and discipline in obtaining the information he sought, was rather random and haphazard. Despite that, this is an interesting read.
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Through our reading, researching, and writing, And Then Some Publishing (and our extended family of readers) mine volumes of books representing a wide variety of tastes. We use the books in our writing, test and try suggested techniques, and we read for enjoyment as well. We wouldn't spend the time reviewing the books if we didn't get something out of it. Read more reviews on other fantastic books at our BookWorksRules.com website.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Weekend Words
"If a fool can hold his tongue, even he can pass for wise; and pass for clever if he keeps his lips tight shut." ---The Bible, Proverbs 17:28
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Delivering effective constructive criticism is an art
by Richard L. Weaver II
Because I taught speech-communication courses for my entire professional life, I either delivered constructive criticism to my students, or I taught graduate students how to effectively use constructive criticism with their students.
Just as writing is an extension of ourselves, our speech is, too. What this means is that as much as we may believe when we are evaluating another person’s writing or speaking, we are criticizing something they have constructed — that is outside of them — we are really judging them. A judgment rendered of another person’s writing or speaking is a judgment of them as a person.
The reason this is important is that it should help those in the criticism business to use caution, to be sensitive, and to show respect. This is especially important when the criticism is to be delivered publicly, in the presence of others — especially when those others happen to be peers.
With the popularity of the television show “American Idol,” and the numerous “look-alike” programs, public criticism, appraisal, and evaluation have been thrust into the public’s consciousness.
Because I am a writer, whether it is essays such as this, academic articles, speeches, or books, I am often on the receiving end of a great deal of criticism. This has placed me, as well, in the position of being asked to deliver criticism to others — family and friends. The only reason I mention this is because it positions me uniquely: sharing my own reactions to what I receive and sharing the cautions and constraints under which I operate when delivering criticism to others.
Criticism is one of the tools by which we are fashioned for better things.
In looking for a place to study for my Ph.D., I asked people who would be the toughest and most rigorous faculty member to have as my graduate advisor, and I enrolled at Indiana University with the sole purpose of having this person as my counselor, guide, and mentor. I sought out criticism. From that point on, I no longer had to invite it, it became part and parcel of the interaction I had with my advisor.
Overarching guidelines for giving criticism include delivering it in private when possible. Beyond that, it is important never to sound threatening, focus on the other person's personality, nor overstate the problem by using words such as “always,” “never,” or “worst.” In addition, keep the criticism balanced and keep focused on the problem.
Additional guidelines include giving criticism soon after the event, sticking to one subject rather than stringing together a number of criticisms, not reminding anyone of previous instances that are either resolved or unresolved, and using the “I” mode (“As I see it...,” “I think your best approach would be...,” or “If I were doing it, I think....”).
The events that triggered my interest in writing this essay include a number of instances witnessed on “American Idol” when contestants reveal belligerence, hostility, aggression, and confrontation when criticized. Most hostility, as anyone knows who has watched this reality show, has been directed toward Simon Cowell, one of the judges of contestants
Simon Cowell’s critiques are often the most accurate, less varnished, and most realistic of those given. Contestants appear by their choice. They are choosing to enter one of the toughest professions in the world, and one of critics' jobs is to offer them a realistic view regarding their choice of going into this profession and their chance for success.
An important aspect of any delivered criticism is how it is received. The older I get, the more I realize how little I know. But, I have always believed that I just don’t “measure up,” and with this outlook, I guess I never will. It’s a little like wisdom: “At what point do you become wise?”
Nothing makes most people bristle more quickly than unfair, unskillful, or unsolicited criticism.
When delivered well, most people will welcome feedback, and most, too, will listen to it. When receiving criticism it is important to maintain eye contact with the other person and an open body language. For example, it is best not to cross your arms, turn away from the other person, or reveal any contrary, antagonistic, or hostile attitudes or facial expressions. Rolling your eyes is an obvious, easily perceived, negative reaction.
These rules for receiving criticism are obvious and easy to accomplish. To make critical comments useful, you need to do more.
First, restate the criticism to make certain you understand it. Restatement also reveals a receptive attitude, and it may garner further clarifications or helpful comments. Second, view the criticism as an attempt to fix a problem rather than as a personal attack.
Because of the comments made at the opening of this essay, it is easy to view any negative criticism of your writing or speaking as an attack on your character. If this occurs, a natural reaction is hostility and retaliation—which may include name calling, comments like, “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” or a quick, negative, nonverbal expression and a retreat from the situation.
If you have been able to follow these rules for receiving criticism, then the final one, perhaps, is the most important. You need to discover a solution or solutions to each of them. Effective constructive criticism should prompt constructive change. That is what results in growth and development.
Being critical is easy, and offering criticism is easier still. But, delivering effective constructive criticism, when compared with nagging, nit-picking, and negativity, is truly an art. Feedback is critical for everyone, and it can serve as a valuable lesson. When critics offer comments from a foundation of sensitivity, trust, and respect, when they refrain from arrogance, threat, and emotion, and when their intentions and expectations are clear, their criticism becomes most valuable, and the art becomes obvious.
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At BankersOnline.com, Dr. Barton Goldsmith has an essay, “10 Tips for Delivering (Constructive) Criticism: Giving staff the feedback that they need and want,” Goldsmith’s 10 items are: 1) Take an honest look at where you're coming from. 2) Start and end with a compliment. 3) Listen to your own voice. 4) Eye contact is important It helps both of you stay focused and it communicates sincerity. 5) Choose the best time and place. 6) Do your best to avoid hurting your anyone's feelings. 7) Talk about the behavior not the person. 8) Use gentle humor if possible. 9) Work with your team member to improve the situation. 10) Don't harp. Once you have asked for what you need from your team members.
At About.Com: Race Relations, there is a short essay entitled, “How To Deliver Constructive Feedback in an Interculturally Sensitive Manner.” At this site there are six suggestions for delivering constructive feedback. It is worth a read.
At TheWorshipCommunity website, Russ Hutto uses the comments of the American Idol judges to characterize different styles for delivering criticism in his essay, “Constructive Criticsm: Are You Simon, Paula, or Randy?.”
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Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Because I taught speech-communication courses for my entire professional life, I either delivered constructive criticism to my students, or I taught graduate students how to effectively use constructive criticism with their students.
Just as writing is an extension of ourselves, our speech is, too. What this means is that as much as we may believe when we are evaluating another person’s writing or speaking, we are criticizing something they have constructed — that is outside of them — we are really judging them. A judgment rendered of another person’s writing or speaking is a judgment of them as a person.
The reason this is important is that it should help those in the criticism business to use caution, to be sensitive, and to show respect. This is especially important when the criticism is to be delivered publicly, in the presence of others — especially when those others happen to be peers.
With the popularity of the television show “American Idol,” and the numerous “look-alike” programs, public criticism, appraisal, and evaluation have been thrust into the public’s consciousness.
Because I am a writer, whether it is essays such as this, academic articles, speeches, or books, I am often on the receiving end of a great deal of criticism. This has placed me, as well, in the position of being asked to deliver criticism to others — family and friends. The only reason I mention this is because it positions me uniquely: sharing my own reactions to what I receive and sharing the cautions and constraints under which I operate when delivering criticism to others.
Criticism is one of the tools by which we are fashioned for better things.
In looking for a place to study for my Ph.D., I asked people who would be the toughest and most rigorous faculty member to have as my graduate advisor, and I enrolled at Indiana University with the sole purpose of having this person as my counselor, guide, and mentor. I sought out criticism. From that point on, I no longer had to invite it, it became part and parcel of the interaction I had with my advisor.
Overarching guidelines for giving criticism include delivering it in private when possible. Beyond that, it is important never to sound threatening, focus on the other person's personality, nor overstate the problem by using words such as “always,” “never,” or “worst.” In addition, keep the criticism balanced and keep focused on the problem.
Additional guidelines include giving criticism soon after the event, sticking to one subject rather than stringing together a number of criticisms, not reminding anyone of previous instances that are either resolved or unresolved, and using the “I” mode (“As I see it...,” “I think your best approach would be...,” or “If I were doing it, I think....”).
The events that triggered my interest in writing this essay include a number of instances witnessed on “American Idol” when contestants reveal belligerence, hostility, aggression, and confrontation when criticized. Most hostility, as anyone knows who has watched this reality show, has been directed toward Simon Cowell, one of the judges of contestants
Simon Cowell’s critiques are often the most accurate, less varnished, and most realistic of those given. Contestants appear by their choice. They are choosing to enter one of the toughest professions in the world, and one of critics' jobs is to offer them a realistic view regarding their choice of going into this profession and their chance for success.
An important aspect of any delivered criticism is how it is received. The older I get, the more I realize how little I know. But, I have always believed that I just don’t “measure up,” and with this outlook, I guess I never will. It’s a little like wisdom: “At what point do you become wise?”
Nothing makes most people bristle more quickly than unfair, unskillful, or unsolicited criticism.
When delivered well, most people will welcome feedback, and most, too, will listen to it. When receiving criticism it is important to maintain eye contact with the other person and an open body language. For example, it is best not to cross your arms, turn away from the other person, or reveal any contrary, antagonistic, or hostile attitudes or facial expressions. Rolling your eyes is an obvious, easily perceived, negative reaction.
These rules for receiving criticism are obvious and easy to accomplish. To make critical comments useful, you need to do more.
First, restate the criticism to make certain you understand it. Restatement also reveals a receptive attitude, and it may garner further clarifications or helpful comments. Second, view the criticism as an attempt to fix a problem rather than as a personal attack.
Because of the comments made at the opening of this essay, it is easy to view any negative criticism of your writing or speaking as an attack on your character. If this occurs, a natural reaction is hostility and retaliation—which may include name calling, comments like, “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” or a quick, negative, nonverbal expression and a retreat from the situation.
If you have been able to follow these rules for receiving criticism, then the final one, perhaps, is the most important. You need to discover a solution or solutions to each of them. Effective constructive criticism should prompt constructive change. That is what results in growth and development.
Being critical is easy, and offering criticism is easier still. But, delivering effective constructive criticism, when compared with nagging, nit-picking, and negativity, is truly an art. Feedback is critical for everyone, and it can serve as a valuable lesson. When critics offer comments from a foundation of sensitivity, trust, and respect, when they refrain from arrogance, threat, and emotion, and when their intentions and expectations are clear, their criticism becomes most valuable, and the art becomes obvious.
-----
At BankersOnline.com
At About.Com: Race Relations
At TheWorshipCommunity website
-----
Copyright December, 2009 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"You have no control over what the other guy does. You only have control over what you do." ---A. J. Kitt
Day #108 - Compete only with yourself.
Day #108 - Compete only with yourself.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “‘Delivering effective constructive criticism is an art.” If you watch the reality shows where judges criticize the performance or activity of others, you certainly have been exposed to the delivery of constructive criticism (good and bad), and you probably have some feelings about what you have witnessed. This essay offers some specific, practical suggestions for offering criticism in a positive, reinforcing, and healthy manner.
Share your link. Have you written anything about delivering effective constructive criticism? Or, have you been on the receiving end of constructive criticism? Can you share some insights about those times when you have given or received criticism and how it feels to be on the giving or receiving end? What would you like to tell people about delivering criticism? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Delivering effective constructive criticism is an art
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Being critical is easy, and offering criticism is easier still. But, delivering effective constructive criticism, when compared with nagging, nit-picking, and negativity, is truly an art. Feedback is critical for everyone, and it can serve as a valuable lesson. When critics offer comments from a foundation of sensitivity, trust, and respect, when they refrain from arrogance, threat, and emotion, and when their intentions and expectations are clear, their criticism becomes most valuable, and the art becomes obvious.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about delivering effective constructive criticism? Or, have you been on the receiving end of constructive criticism? Can you share some insights about those times when you have given or received criticism and how it feels to be on the giving or receiving end? What would you like to tell people about delivering criticism? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Delivering effective constructive criticism is an art
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Being critical is easy, and offering criticism is easier still. But, delivering effective constructive criticism, when compared with nagging, nit-picking, and negativity, is truly an art. Feedback is critical for everyone, and it can serve as a valuable lesson. When critics offer comments from a foundation of sensitivity, trust, and respect, when they refrain from arrogance, threat, and emotion, and when their intentions and expectations are clear, their criticism becomes most valuable, and the art becomes obvious.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, November 30, 2009
Book Review Mondays
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by Gregory and Martine Millman
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
If you have been home schooled, know someone who was home schooled, or you plan to home school your children, read this book. With extensive writing experience before the publication of this book, the Millman’s have written a very readable, detailed, and encouraging book about how they home schooled their six children. (There are 8 ½ pages of notes.) I found the Millman’s insights about how to encourage freedom, innovation, autonomy, self-organization, and creative collaboration (hallmarks of the home schooling tradition) in their own teaching to be fascinating. This is a practical, informed, caring, no-nonsense approach in which you not only learn about the economics of home schooling, but, too, how parents can handle their children’s full education. Knowing nothing about home schooling previously (They include a seven-page bibliography.) and having read no books on the subject, the Millmans offer a great introduction, an informative examination, and an entertaining read.
More information at Amazon.com No obligation to buy Click below: |
by G. Pascal Zachary
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
In a warm, personal, self-disclosing, and endearing writing style, Zachary’s story is endearing. Here is how he describes Chizo the first time he sees her not wearing her zoo uniform: “I’m sipping a large Star beer when I see her come down the steps from my room inside the hotel. She wears a backless skintight top, cut low on her chest, and a short black skirt, revealing her thighs, which now seem sexy rather than simply powerful. She wears black vinyl boots with spiky heels, making her seem much taller. I put the beer down and stare at her as she comes toward me. I’ve never seen her before in anything but her zoo clothes. Now I see what’s hidden underneath those clothes....I like what I see” (p. 69). This is a true love story, but it is far more than that. I thought M. Allison’s description, in her review of his book at Amazon.com, explains well and accurately, exactly what you will get in Zachary’s book: “there's rich context about Africa and Chizo's African-ness, which give the book more color and substance than a "mere" love story. It's a vicarious journey into a terrifying, beautiful, compelling place, a place in space and time and a place in the heart, told with intensity, honesty and a sense of wonder.” I found the story compelling, the cultural insights and differences he describes intriguing, and the way he approaches Africa incredibly endearing. If you like love stories, you will love this book.
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Through our reading, researching, and writing, And Then Some Publishing (and our extended family of readers) mine volumes of books representing a wide variety of tastes. We use the books in our writing, test and try suggested techniques, and we read for enjoyment as well. We wouldn't spend the time reviewing the books if we didn't get something out of it. Read more reviews on other fantastic books at our BookWorksRules.com website.
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