LAUGH . . . And Then Some

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.

"What's the matter?" he asks.

"I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice.

"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"

"I can't see my ass coming into work today."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From Day #307 in a complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II

LAUGH . . . And Then Some

Marriage changes passion.  Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it.  So I said, "Implants?"  She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From Day #293 in a complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II

LAUGH . . . And Then Some

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore.

She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From Day #284 in a complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II