The true meaning of birthdays: Developing a receptivity to and capacity for wisdom

by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

As I was getting dressed for church, the call came in on my cell phone, and when I answered, a chorus of youthful, cheerful, and well-prompted singers broke into their rendition of “Happy Birthday” to grandpa.  What a great way to begin the day — actually, any day — but particularly this one!

That alone could be the true meaning of birthdays, and this would be a very short essay!
    
When I was young I thought people my age were “really old,” but I have since changed that attitude for some strange reason!  (:-) — smiley emoticon here)
    
Chronological age does matter, and if someone doesn’t believe it, talk to them about what happens to the physical body as it ages.  Often, too, chronological age directly affects mental attitude.  As my daughter is fond of saying about almost anything (and this time it refers to age): “It is what it is!”  She’s incredibly accurate, and I promised her I would credit her with this phrase (now a well-worn cliche!) if I used it.
    
I don’t really think age itself is that important, but my wife has pointed out two things as I approach another decade milestone: “Do you realize just how many years we have left?”  Her second comment was, “We must travel while we still can.”
    
Both of her comments are true and must be recognized and honored — and obeyed.  When you are in good physical health it is hard to imagine life otherwise.
    
Speaking of life otherwise, we met a lovely, lively, active couple when cruising.  With them we felt comfortable, relaxed, and we so enjoyed their company, we decided to visit them on our Lake Superior, Canadian, fifth-wheel trip less than a year after meeting them.  The husband had just died and the wife had a debilitating stroke and was wheelchair bound and had difficulty speaking.  Situations like this one force you to face an uncomfortable reality.
    
That doesn’t, however, reflect on “the true meaning of birthdays.”  Their true meaning lies in the history, knowledge, and wisdom we gain with each passing year.  If you don’t think so, let me explain.    

I have found — over and over, I might add — that with growing older comes an additional history one doesn’t have or appreciate when younger.  History allows us to see things with greater perspective.  For example, I love seeing young people as they look to their future with hope, romance, and optimism.  I taught a large (300 students per semester) interpersonal communication class for many years, and I would solicit student responses on half sheets of paper each lecture period.  Asked questions about what they wanted, needed, or desired, they would respond honestly and directly.  Without any aggregate of events to support their viewpoints, they lacked perspective about how interpersonal relationships worked or the differences between males and females and what such differences mean.  Without a history, they did not yet take life seriously nor understand the purpose of knowing and learning as it related to their future.
    
Through reading, interacting, and learning we acquire the knowledge to resolve conflicts, solve problems, and make decisions.  What Sandra Carey said about the difference between knowledge and wisdom makes sense: “Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living; the other helps you make a life.”  The older we become the more information and understanding we acquire.  It results from experience, practical ability, and skill.  But it has always been true that the mere acquisition of knowledge alone, is insufficient, as Carey points out in the quotation above.  There is little question about the strengths that knowledge has to offer, but it stops short of wisdom, even though it contributes significantly to its development.    
    
Wisdom involves good, practical judgement, and common sense.  Yes, there is a direct, positive correlation between knowledge and wisdom — the greater the knowledge, the greater the likelihood of true and right discernment.  One does not guarantee the other, but it certainly increases the likelihood.
    
If knowledge itself helps supply the information necessary for us to resolve conflicts, solve problems, and make decisions, it is wisdom that helps us decide which conflicts to resolve, the problems that deserve our attention, and the decisions that must be made.  Not only that, but wisdom helps, too, discern which resolutions, solutions, and decisions are the best ones.  Wisdom, then, is how we make appropriate use of knowledge.
    
The first clear indicator of when you become wise or when wisdom is revealing itself in your life is when the discovery occurs that you are responsible for your life and for your future.  It is a realization that usually occurs sometime during one’s education when you realize that it isn’t your teachers on whom you are dependent, it is you, yourself.  That is, whether you learn and what you learn is up to you.  Your teachers, just like books, parents, pastors, priests, experiences, etc., are simply purveyors of information.
    
The second clear indicator of when you become wise or when wisdom is revealing itself in your life is when you acquire a vision and purpose in your life.  It is true that others can have an influence in this, but, in the end, it is you and you alone who must acquire, adopt, and accept the vision for your life.  Without a vision and purpose, it is possible to wander aimlessly — a characteristic of the unwise and foolish.  Vision and purpose are the earmarks of both wisdom and power.
    
The third and final clear indicator of becoming wise and revealing wisdom is when you take action to realize both your vision and purpose.  Not to take action is foolish and unwise.  Taking action is the sign of those who not only live with purpose and direction, but they, too, are the ones who will make a difference and bring value to the world.
    
The true meaning of birthdays is the growth, development, and change we experience as we acquire the history and knowledge that wisdom requires.  Wisdom doesn’t automatically come with age, but with determination, persistence, patience, and observation we can make good use of the history and knowledge we acquire and thus develop a receptivity to and capacity for wisdom.
- - - - - -
I thought the definition of wisdom at the Wikipedia website is especially good for this essay: “Wisdom is a deep understanding and realizing of people, things, events or situations, resulting in the ability to choose or act to consistently produce the optimum results with a minimum of time and energy. It is the ability to optimally (effectively and efficiently) apply perceptions and knowledge and so produce the desired results. Wisdom is also the comprehension of what is true or right coupled with optimum judgment as to action. ”

“How to observe to acquire wisdom” is an essay at Ezinearticles  by Aasim Gill.  Gill’s ten ideas for improving observation are excellent: 1. Be calm.  2. Have the peace of mind.
3. Talk less.  4. See as much as possible.  5. Improve the movement of your eyes by seeing things one by one and slowly.  6. But you must respond to abrupt changes or movements.  7. The mind should be thinking fast and should not be slow or it may make you dull.  8. Act and behave as slow as the intelligence agents do in movies like James bond.  9. They all observe but they take very quick actions because they are using their mind very quickly.  10. During observation take long breaths consistently, gives oxygen to brain as a food and you will think better and fast.
- - - - - - -
Copyright October, 2011, by And Then Some Publishing, L.L.C.