Finding time to relax

by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.    

It’s easy to get caught up in the helter-skelter of everyday life, community activities, job-related responsibilities, family happenings, etc.  It can be, too, workaholism—the compulsive and unrelenting need to work.  I tend to be a workaholic.  I’ve been one all my life.  When one project is complete I immediately proceed to the next one.  Sometimes, too, I am involved in a number of projects at the same time.
    
I remember when I was teaching, and I took great personal pride (I never told anyone else at the time) in having my secretary involved in a revision of my teacher’s manual used by my 30 teaching assistants.  At the same time, I was involved in the revision of two of my college textbooks, and both of the revised manuscripts were being read by developmental editors at two different publishing companies.  I had a speech waiting for publication in Vital Speeches of the Day, and there were two scholarly articles, one waiting for immediate publication, and the other being read by a journal editor who was considering it for publication.  The reader [a collection of articles] for my graduate-level course was being prepared by a duplicating office on campus, and while all of this was going on, I was preparing another book and updating the lectures I used in the basic course.  I absolutely loved it.
    
So, it would be obvious for a reader of this essay to wonder, “Who are you to talk about finding time to relax?”  I would contend quite the opposite: If a workaholic like myself can find time to relax, then that is precisely the person from whom I would like to hear!  It’s like the very old aphorism: “If you have a job to do, give it to a busy person.”
    
I give myself plenty of time to relax; however, I do not waste time between work and that designated for relaxation.  “Designated” to relaxing.  Getting up at 3 a.m. on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I find my two hours of exercising and jogging very relaxing.  Every morning, seven-days-a-week, I spend 1 1/2-to-2 hours reading newspapers while eating breakfast and listening to background music—a relaxing way to begin each day and calm the spirit.
    
For lunch, I take a full one-hour, relaxing break, to make and eat my lunch, listen to music, and read any mail.  Between projects, I often take a short break to pay bills, read and review books, post on Facebook, bring my blog up-to-date, or write a new essay.  It may sound like this is work; however, like a professional golfer finds playing golf relaxing, I find writing (and working in my study) relaxing activities.  I write to relax.
    
In addition to these forms of relaxation, my wife and I usually take two vacations each year.  Often, one of these is a cruise.  We have taken ten.  For the second vacation, we take our fifth-wheel somewhere.  These are additional relaxing times and, for the most part (not always), I try not to take work along.  I do spend some time on each trip writing essays—not as work, but for relaxing.  (Many of these essays eventually get posted on my blog )
    
Now I have revealed a secret.  Much of my “work” is interwoven with my “play,” and in many cases, it would be difficult for someone to distinguish between them.  Perhaps, that is sufficient explanation for how much I accomplish.
    
As an important aside here, I have to confess that I often work with the television on in the background—especially if there is a sporting function about which I am interested.  I seldom just sit and watch a television program, unless it is later in the evening (after 9:00 p.m.), I have finished a project (like an essay like this), and I am ready to enjoy a beer along with a few pretzels, some lightly-salted peanuts, and popcorn.  That is not just the way I celebrate the end of a day, but it, too, is a way to take my little bit of medicinal alcohol.
    
Very seldom, if ever, will you find me just sitting, relaxing, and watching television.  There is little on television about which I am interested (except Big Ten college football); however, the shows I enjoy (such as Chris Matthews, Keith Olbermann, and Rachel Maddow on MSNBC), I can have on in the background while I work at the computer.
    
One method I have found useful for finding time to relax is working in blocks of time.  It is easier to get a group of projects finished when they are related.  For example, I save bills for several days, then I will sit at my desk and pay all the bills, write all the checks, and prepare them for mailing—all at the same time.  While at the computer writing essays, I will often post on Facebook, answer email messages, and bring my blog up-to-date.  What these blocks of time afford is small blocks of time, too, to relax.
    
During the time I was teaching, I advocated for variety as opposed to blocks of time.  That is, I spread my time among a wide-variety of projects—with an emphasis on “wide.”  It was, at that time, the only way I would have time to write.  Teaching, lecturing, directing my graduate teaching assistants, and looking over the daily responses I required in my 300-level, interpersonal communication class (that had an enrollment of 150 students or more), took enormous amounts of time, so I would arrange my schedule, in order not to become too tired from working on a single project, to bounce between responsibilities.  It kept me awake, alert, and sharp—and, it helped me accomplish a great deal more.
    
What I wondered after I finished my teaching career is how did I ever do it?  My writing responsibilities were greater then (“publish or perish”), then they were after I retired from teaching.  Also, I was involved in writing two popular college textbooks at the same time.  It is obvious—in retrospect—what I did.  First, I did far less relaxing.  Two, because of the immediacy and responsibilities of teaching, I had to sacrifice the amount of time I gave to writing my textbooks.  I just could not give them the time I was able to give them once I retired  from teaching.
    
What I have discovered regarding “finding time to relax,” is that you must purposely work relaxation into your schedule.  If you just plan to relax when you find the time—especially if you are a workaholic—it is unlikely you will do much relaxing, if any at all.  I am not suggesting that the way I relax will work for everyone (perhaps no one!), but it offers two important lessons: First, different strokes for different folks!  You need to work out a system or plan that purposefully and specifically incorporates relaxation.  
    
The second lesson, and although I have not mentioned it thus far in this essay, relaxation will help you work better and more efficiently.  For me, it improves my energy level, sleep, concentration, and creative ability.  Doctors, too, will tell you relaxation gives the heart a rest by slowing the heart rate, reduces blood pressure, slows the rate of breathing, which reduces the need for oxygen, increases blood flow to the muscles, and decreases muscle tension.*   Personally, there need be no more justification for working relaxation into my life.

*From the Heart of Healing web site, “Benefits of relaxation.”
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At MayoClinic.com the essay at Stress Management is called, “Relaxation techniques: Learn ways to reduce your stress,” the Mayo Clinic staff write, “Relaxation techniques can reduce stress symptoms and help you enjoy a better quality of life. Explore relaxation techniques you can do on your own,” and they offer 8 symptoms that can be reduced by relaxation and several main types of relaxation techniques.

At the New York Times, “Science” page, Daniel Goleman writes a wonderful essay on relaxation entitled, “Relaxation: Surprising Benefits Detected” (May 13, 1986) that you will find thorough, interesting, and beneficial.

At HelpGuide.com,  Jeanne Segal, Ph.D., Joanna Saisan, MSW, Melinda Smith, M.A., Ellen Jaffe-Gill, M.A, and Robert Segal, M.A. contributed to the article, “Relaxation Techniques for Stress Relief: Relaxation Exercises to Reduce Stress, Anxiety, and Depression,” in which they offer a thorough discussion of the relaxation response, deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness meditation, guided imagery, yoga, tai chi, and massage therapy for stress relief.
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Copyright July, 2011, by And Then Some Publishing, LLC.