White Sands National Monument and Missile Range

Essay by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
 
Honestly, I thought we had one of our most impressive visits when we toured Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge (which is the subject of another essay of mine). It was as if one experience was trying to upstage and outshine the other. The drive from Elephant Butte, where we were staying in our fifth wheel at the Cozy Cove RV Park, is 153 miles (just over 2 hours), and we had no idea what we would be seeing.

There is a Visitor’s Center at the entrance to the paved road (the Dunes Drive) that leads about 2 miles north to the start of the sands.

As you enter, you cross the edge of the dunes which is just a few feet high and support some plant life—several species of grass, yucca, and saltbush. Further into the monument there is little or no vegetation—just an unbroken white landscape.

As you begin the drive into the monument, you will notice that the road is paved, although blowing sand often covers the surface. Toward the center of the monument, however, the surface of the road is simply compacted gypsum, and the road becomes just a series of large cleared areas. This is important simply because the roads then can be adapted to changes in dune positions. The sands move up to 20 feet per year—growing, cresting, then slumping, but always advancing.

Driven by strong southwest winds, the sand covers everything in its path.

During the summer in the center of the dunes, everything is white, dazzingly bright, intensely hot, and capped on most days by a clear blue sky. Our visit duplicated this description without the intense heat.

The White Sands National Monument (WSNM) is considered one of the world’s great natural wonders. The wave-like dunes of pure gypsum sand move across 275 square miles of desert and, thus, create the world’s largest gypsum dune field. It is truly a sight to behold! The National Monument includes only about half of the sand in the entire dune field.

Within the dune area there are a couple of sites where shelters and picnic tables allow places to have your lunch. Because we always pack a lunch before traveling, we ate it in one of these areas—especially valuable because of the shade.

Despite its harsh climate and surroundings, the dunes "support a limited range of wildlife., some of which has evolved white coloration to match the surroundings, and exist as species unique to this region, such as the white sands wood rat, the Apache pocket mouse, the white sands prairie lizard and the bleached earless lizard. The most prominent plant, in the dunes," this website continues, "is the soaptree yucca, a species with numerous thin narrow leaves and an extensive root system that can stabilize a mound of sand and remain in place after wind causes the surrounding dune to move away."

What you may not be aware of is a vast area of desert and mountain ranges 100 by 40 miles in size directly to the west of Alamogordo. This area is closed to public access because it is used by the military for various kinds of weapons testing. There are warning signs as you approach the gate to the military base, and, as a visitor, you are not allowed to drive in without a thorough and complete search of your vehicle and, after showing your driver’s license, registration, and proof of insurance, obtaining a vehicle pass.

We were told at the gate that if we just wanted to visit the military museum, we could park in the visitor parking area prior to going through the gate and, thus, avoid the search, and still be close to the museum, located just inside the gate. That is precisely what we did by going through the gate, making a U-turn at the traffic light, coming back through the gate and entering the parking area.

It was at this military base—at the Trinity Site—where the first atomic bomb was detonated in July, 1945.

If you followed the information at the White Sands National Monument website , you would think that you could not visit the base except on two days each year: "the first Saturdays of April and October, when accompanied tours are provided." That is not entirely true.

The military base has a museum, as noted, which is interesting and worth a visit. The feature, however, that intrigued us the most was "Missile Park," where there are displays of the 61 (too many to list here) rockets and missiles tested at the site. You simply walk a winding concrete sidewalk that takes you to each clearly labeled display. Those that I remember included the Hawk, Nike (whether it was the Ajax, Hercules, or Zeus, I don’t remember), Patriot, Pershing I and II, Redstone, and Sidewinder.

One of the most striking images in the Missile Park is the Aeroshell Flying Saucer. You can see a picture of the Saucer at the flickr White Sands Missile Base Museum website . This was the object seen over Roswell and probably gave rise to all the "flying saucer" rumors. The real purpose of the Aeroshell was to test a method of landing a missile on the planet Mars.

As we entered the gate, the guard informed us that pictures could be taken at "Missile Park," but only under the condition that the camera is pointed toward the mountains and not down into the valley below the park. The valley is where active missile silos are located.

At the White Sands Missile Base Museum website , it says this about the Missile Base: "It is the largest military installation in the United States. This strip of New Mexico desert has been in use since the 40s to test practically every weapon system in the U.S. military arsenal. Pioneering research in rocket technology shortly after World War II at WSMR [White Sands Missile Range] helped propel the U.S. into space. Because of this, WSMR is sometimes known as the ‘Birthplace of the Race to Space.’"

If you haven’t gained the feeling, let me be specific: This area of the country, between the White Sands National Monument and the White Sands Missile Range Museum, is an incredibly important region, and a visit to this area will certainly convince you—especially if you head in this direction with no knowledge of what to expect, as I did—why I was so impressed.

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There is a lot of information at the White Sands Missile Range website , including a brief history and an explanation as to why it is considered the birthplace of the race to space.

At tripadvisor, "White Sands National Monument," , there are reviews of the Monument by people who have visited. Their reviews are outstanding.

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Copyright October, 2013, by And Then Some Publishing LLC

Quotations by Richard L. Weaver II

Certainly it’s a risk or gamble, but when you venture and win, the benefit to your ego and your willingness to take a similar risk or gamble a second time, increase out of all proportion to the chance that you took in the beginning.

And Then Some News

The first paragraph of Thursday's essay, "White Sands National Monument and Missile Range," reads as follows:

Honestly, I thought we had one of our most impressive visits when we toured Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge (which is the subject of next week's essay). It was as if one experience was trying to upstage and outshine the other. The drive from Elephant Butte, where we were staying in our fifth wheel at the Cozy Cove RV Park, is 153 miles (just over 2 hours), and we had no idea what we would be seeing.

The compound effect: Jumpstart your income, your life, your success

By Darren Hardy

http://www.amazon.com/Compound-Effect-Darren-Hardy/dp/0981951244

Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

Over the years I have read a large number of self-help books. This one is a small book (6-inches wide and only 7½-inches long) of only 162 pages of text. So, right up front you know that it will be a short read. It reads quickly and comfortably.

Every day of his life, Hardy reads "something positive and instructional" (p. 103). I would recommend this book—that is, if you’re looking for something positive and instructional. It fits, it works, it succeeds! "Finally," Hardy writes, "I like to read at least ten pages of an inspirational book before going to sleep. I know the mind continues to process the last information consumed before bedtime, so I want to focus my attention on something constructive and helpful in making progress with my goals and ambitions" (p. 104). I have a second suggestion: Read this book. If you’ve already finished it? Read it again.

There is no index, no notes, and no references. Often, this is a trigger for me that suggests that the book is lightweight, frivolous, shallow, and not to be taken seriously. What counters that notion are the characteristics of the writer of the book.

Hardy has been a leader in the personal development industry for sixteen years, a successful entrepreneur by the age of eighteen, and CEO of a company producing $50 million in revenue by the age of 27. But these, to me, are not the most profound credentials. He has been the publisher and editorial director of SUCCESS magazine for five years (since September of 2007).

It is his work at SUCCESS magazine that gives him the unique credentials to write this book. That is because, as he says it himself, "as publisher of SUCCESS magazine, I sift through thousands of article submissions and books, help choose the experts we feature in the magazine, and review all of their material. Each month I interview a half-dozen top experts on a multitude of success topics and drill down to their best ideas. All day, every day, I read and filter through an ocean of personal-achievement information" (p. 3). That is what makes this book great—no, not just great, terrific!

Throughout the book he borrows from the self-help gurus he has interviewed, written about, or read about. He cites his sources, of course, but he borrows liberally. So, this isn’t just Hardy talking, he backs up his thoughts, and he offers tidbits and suggestions that have worked for others and that he, himself, has adopted in his life. This makes for a very enjoyable read.

His background, expertise, and knowledge is evident (and appreciated) throughout this short book, and he is absolutely correct: If you want a distillation of what all the other self-help authors have written about ad nauseam, this is surely the book for you. It is crisp, succinct, well-written, and full of noteworthy, memorable, and valuable examples.

There are so many places in this book that directly reinforce what I have been teaching for over thirty years. For example, he says, "For most of us, it’s the frequent, small, and seemingly inconsequential choices that are of grave concern. I’m talking about the decisions you think don’t make any difference at all. It’s the little things that inevitably and predictably derail your success. Whether they’re bone-headed maneuvers, no-biggie behaviors, or are disguised as positive choices (those are expecially insidious), these seemingly insignificfant decisions can completely throw you off course because you’re not mindful of them" (p. 25).

For a second example, Hardy was in a seminar when the speaker asked, ‘What percentage of shared responsibility do you have in making a relationship work?’ Well, the answer is NOT 50/50, 51/49, or even 80/20. "The instructor turned to the easel and wrote 100/0 on the paper in big black letters. ‘You have to be willing to give 100 percent with zero expectation of receiving anything in return’. Only when you’re willing to take 100 percent responsibility for making the relationship work will it work. Otherwise, a relationship left to chance will always be vulnerable to disaster.’" (p. 29).

For a third example, "You alone are responsible for what you do, don’t do, or how you respond to what’s done to you. This empowering mindset revolutionized my life. Luck, circumstances, or the right situation wasn’t what mattered. If it was to be, it was up to me" (p. 30). It revolutionized my life as well.

For yet another (can you believe a fourth?) example, "Personally, I’m always happy when something is hard. Why? Because I know that most people won’t do what it takes; therefore, it will be easier for me to step in front of the pack and take the lead" (p. 90). There are so many examples!

Also, I liked the "Summary Action Steps" Hardy places at the end of each chapter. No, they’re not really needed. This is a short book, and chapters read quickly. But I think the reinforcement they offer is useful, and since each one is so practical, they can serve a functional assist for those who are trying to put Hardy’s advice into action.

You see what really energized me about this simple but profound book? He reinforces, buttresses, supports, and lends encouragement to what I have taught, lectured about, put into my speeches, and written about for all of my professional life. All in a 162-page book! It has taken me so much more time and space that it’s embarrassing! (He says with tongue placed squarely in cheek! —even though tongues are not square!)

This book isn’t merely motivational (and yet it is!), it is inspirational! If you are looking for a book that will rouse your spirits, stir your emotions, energize your conscience, influence your intellect, galvanize your gut, and incite you to action with a fire in your belly, then choose this stimulating, animating, uplifting book because it will have a compound effect on your life!

Friday Humor

A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO TORONTO , WHEN A BLONDE IN

ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP, AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS

SECTION AND SITS DOWN.



THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS, AND ASKS

TO SEE HER TICKET.



HE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY

CLASS, AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.



THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M

GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."


THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS

THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE

BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS, THAT BELONGS IN

ECONOMY, AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.



THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO

EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY
SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.



THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M

GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."



THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD

HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST

THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.



THE PILOT SAYS, "YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL

HANDLE THIS, I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE."



HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR,

AND SHE SAYS, "OH, I'M SORRY." AND GETS UP AND GOES

BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY..



THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND

ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT

ANY FUSS.


"I TOLD HER SOFTLY, "FIRST CLASS ISN'T GOING TO TORONTO ".

Three Snapshots of New Mexico

Essay by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
 
As we traveled to and from the Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge and to and from the White Sands National Monument (on Interstate 25), we saw small signs along the highway that advertised Silver City. Once again, we packed a lunch, and our trip took almost three hours from Elephant Butte where we were staying at the Cozy Cove RV Park. We left shortly after 9 a.m., and immediately upon entering Silver City asked about a park where we could eat our lunch. Gough Park was the suggested location, and it was situated in the center of the city.

"Perched on the edge of the Gila National Forest in a high-desert wonderland of ponderosas, deep gorges, and red-rock mesas, Silver City is a bit rough around the edges," says one website. The town sits on top of a site that has been home to Native Americans, Hispanic, and Anglo settlers for hundreds of years. It was formed in the 1870s after the discovery of silver and quickly became a boom town. The silver industry crashed in 1893.

With approximately 10,000 inhabitants today, Silver City "is noted as becoming one of the most popular small town destinations for visitors to explore in America. Voted the best small town in New Mexico, Silver City offers the best of small town American charm and true American beauty," says another website.

Although we did not have a chance to investigate the local culture, history, exciting events, or beautiful scenery, we did visit a number of the two dozen art galleries and studios in the central city.

What we discovered was well worth our time. Some of the artists maintain superb retail sales areas where most are actively working as well as selling their products. In one, we relaxed and had ice cream in a back corner of the shop amidst a fabulous display of a wide range of the artist’s paintings. It was truly an aesthetic experience. (There was a slight aroma of incense.)

Talking to some of the local artists, we discovered that Western New Mexico University, located there, has an excellent Art Department and through shows and other cooperative efforts, helps support some of the many local artists. Also, Silver City itself makes certain that the local artists can afford to operate shops downtown and live inexpensively in the local community.

= + = + = + =

We left the White Sands Missile Range Museum heading back toward Elephant Butte, New Mexico, when I proposed to our group that we go to Las Cruces (only slightly out of our way) and eat Mexican. There was unanimous support for the suggestion. Having to do a little banking, while others conducted their business, I asked a woman in the bank where the best Mexican restaurant in town was located. She asked which was more important, the price or the atmosphere. Thinking that it is difficult making quality distinctions with Mexican food, I opted for atmosphere.

Not only did she direct us to the La Posta restaurant, but she drew us a map as well. It was a bit difficult to find since it sat back from the main thoroughfare, but it was worth the little difficulty we had.

The restaurant occupies a mid-18th-century adobe building that is the only surviving stagecoach station of the Butterfield Overland Mail route from Tipton, Missouri, to San Francisco. Kit Carson, Pancho Villa, Douglas MacArthur, and Billy the Kid were all here at one time.

Quoting from the Frommer’s review of La Posta at the New York Times, "Las Cruces" travel site: "The entrance leads through a jungle of tall plants beneath a Plexiglas roof, past a tank of piranhas and a noisy aviary of macaws and Amazon parrots, to nine dining rooms with bright, festive decor. . . .The tables are basic, with vinyl and metal chairs." The ambiance alone made our visit worthwhile—and, besides, we were all starving.

La Posta offers traditional "New Mexico" Mexican dishes made from century-old recipes handed down over the years from the Fountain, Chavez, and Griggs families. Because we had no background nor history of their food, we took our excellent waiter’s suggestions and ordered the Tostada Compuesta—which originated at La Posta in 1939. The dish consisted of a toasted corn tortilla cup filled with frioles, red chile con carne, topped with chopped lettuce, diced tomatoes, and grated cheddar cheese.

Others tried the green chile amd the "Locals" favorite, the sour cream enchiladas. That dish consisted of corn tortillas smothered with green chile sauce, topped with grated Monterrey jack cheese and sour cream. Also, it included refritos, rice, and La Posta’s tasty Mexican slaw.

I am not one who normally enjoys Mexican food, but this meal was delicious— and filling.

= + = + = + =

The third and final snapshot comes from Truth or Consequences, NM. It is our visit to the Geronimo Springs Museum. There were at least eight different rooms in the museum, and I will focus on just two of them: the Pottery Room and the Miner’s Log Cabin. There is so much more to see than these alone.

In the Pottery Room we found the largest prehistoric southwestern pottery collections with pottery ranging from A.D. 200 to A.D. 1350. Most of it was the Mimbres and Tularosa black-on-white pottery from southwestern New Mexico found within the Sierra County area. Their collection of early tools, effigies, bone artifacts, and arrowheads is also impressive.

The Miner’s Log Cabin came from the Black Range Mountains and is accessible through the Museum. Dismantled log by log and reconstructed on site exactly as it was built, it includes displays of items from early mining history in Sierra County such as a pedal-powered grinding wheel for sharpening knives and early gasoline and diesel jackhammers.

The Geronimo Museum includes a Ralph Edwards room celebrating when he came to town in 1950, the time the town changed its name to Truth or Consequences to celebrate the 10^th anniversary of the radio show by that name, and his contributions to the town and the Ralph Edwards’ Fiesta—celebrated annually to this day.

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At the Geronimo Springs Museum website, you can read about the other six rooms of the Museum and the displays housed there.

Visit the Silver City, Grant County, Chamber of Commerce’s official website for additional information on Silver City.

The New York Times website labeled, "36 Hours in Silver City" includes a wide range of things to see in Silver City. This is one of the most useful sites on the City.

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Copyright October, 2013, by And Then Some Publishing LLC

Quotations by Richard L. Weaver II

In a state of relaxation I find the best time to consider ideas, problems, and concerns. Relaxation offers views, angles, approaches, and interpretations that I seldom have during the ebb and flow of daily activities.




If you find it difficult to discover a quiet time---when your creativity can truly exhibit itself---begin by imagining yourself behaving the way you want to behave.  Use "covert reinforcement" by imagining your friends, co-workers, family, and acquaintances noticing your behavior and praising you for it.  It will help you carry out your intention of discovering quiet times and, thus, becoming more creative.

And Then Some News

The first paragraph of Thursday's essay, "Three Snapshots of New Mexico," reads like this:

As we traveled to and from the Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge and to and from the White Sands National Monument (on Interstate 25), we saw small signs along the highway that advertised Silver City. Once again, we packed a lunch, and our trip took almost three hours from Elephant Butte where we were staying at the Cozy Cove RV Park. We left shortly after 9 a.m., and immediately upon entering Silver City asked about a park where we could eat our lunch. Gough Park was the suggested location, and it was situated in the center of the city.

The Millionaire Messenger: Make a Difference and a Fortune Sharing Your Advice

By Brendon Burchard
http://www.amazon.com/Millionaire-Messenger-Difference-Fortune-Sharing/dp/B0058M4X2G/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328300266&sr=1-1

Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

This is a book of 156 pages of text with 10 chapters. That means each chapter is approximately 15.6 pages in length in a 6-inch by 9-inch paperback. The book is not very big nor very long. So, does it accomplish what it sets out to do?

The first chapter describes in great detail the car crash that almost took Burchard’s life in the Dominican Republic —being in the Dominican Republic is a bit scary in and of itself, then put an automobile accident on top of that and you sense the anxiety. (We visited the Dominican Republic on one of our Caribbean cruises and, honestly, we never have to visit the island again. It is poor, has little for tourists, and is dirty.)

The story about Burchard’s car crash is well told, but it should be since it has been refined over many years of countless tellings. The point of the story is that it changed Burchard’s life—how he wanted to share his message with others. Tony Robbins was the one who changed his life.

Burchard wanted to "be that voice of inspiration and instruction for people" (p. 12).

I think Burchard can credit much of his success to becoming the best-selling author of Life’s Golden Ticket (HarperCollins, 2007). For me, it was a successful college textbook—Communicating Effectively 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012). Much as many want to be successful, it is nice to have some kind of financial cushion to rest upon.

(To suggest that some people can become a David Bach, John Gray, Oprah Winfrey, Rachael Ray, Dr. Phil, Marianne Williamson, Bob Greene, Tim Gunn, Nate Berkus, or Dr. Mehmet Oz, is stretching to be certain, but it is great to have someone to emulate. Anyone who sets celebrities up to establish goals for readers, has to be a little bit warped. Who in their right mind would accept such false hope?)

Burchard cites the success stories of numerous non-celebrity individuals, but his main focus is on his readers, so he does not dwell on inspirational stories.

Burchard’s ideas are sound. The fundamentals for success are the same in every profession: 1) passion and knowledge, 2) relating and creating, 3) work anywhere and anytime—start now, 4) work with whom you want, 5) develop promotions, 6) pay equals value delivered, not the reason you work, 7) you do not need a large loan, 8) the tools for success are simple and cheap, and 8) same goes for financial income (pp. 24-38).

Please be aware that this book is for beginners. Anyone who has experienced any degree of success in his or her area of life is unlikely to find anything new or challenging in this book. It is about basics, laying out the essentials, and trying to establish a firm foundation.

The advice given in Chapter 5, "10 Steps to an Expert Empire," are essential and are no quick fix: 1) claim and master your topic, 2) pick your audience, 3) discover your audience’s problems, 4) define your story, 5) create a solution, 6) put up a website, 7) campaign your products and programs, 9) get promotional partners, 10) repeat and build the business based on distinction, excellence, and service. (There is no number 8 between pages 61 and 64. It was forgotten!)

One of the problems with this book is that Burchard explains what needs to be done, but he spends little time discussing how to do it. Someone just starting out needs to know how since much of the what is either obvious common sense or reading that is available on Google. I think this is an important omission.

There is nothing in this book that will astound you, and there is no magic formula—even a unique or unusual perspective. What you do come away with, however, is: if you want to become successful, it is very hard work! There is no such thing as a free ride.

Friday Humor

When Gina got off work up there at Toledo, it was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to get home. She sat in the car while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She remembered Ole's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard, she should wait for a snowplow to come by and follow it. That way she would not have to worry about going off the road or getting stuck in a snowdrift.

Sure enough, in a little while, a snowplow went by, so she pulled out and began to follow it. As she followed along behind the plow, she felt quite comfortable and smug as they continued on their way and she was not having any problem with the blizzard or road conditions. After some time had passed, she was somewhat surprised when the snowplow stopped. The driver got out of the cab and came back to her car. He signaled her to roll down her window and asked if she was all right, as she had been following him for a long time. Lena said she was fine and told him of her husband's advice to follow a plow when caught in a blizzard. The driver replied it was okay with him and that she could continue to follow him if she wanted, but he wanted her to know that he was done with the WalMart parking lot now and was going over to Target next.

Knowing when to duck

Essay by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

It was totally unexpected. There was no warning and no way to predict it. Saundra Hybels, the former co-author of my college textbook, Communicating Effectively 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012)—she died unexpectedly in 1999—called me one day in 1972 and asked if I would be interested in writing a textbook with her. In retrospect, saying "yes" to her question was one of the most important responses I made in my professional life.

There were a number of reasons for saying "yes": 1) I thought it would be fun. 2) A successful textbook would help my career. 3) Writing a textbook capitalized on my interests and background. 4) A textbook was another form of teaching, which I had a deep passion about. 5) I thought it would significantly contribute to my credibility, 6) It could add to my meager financial situation. Clearly, this was not a time to duck!

But, notice that knowing when or when not to duck was based on solid reasons. It was not a flippant nor frivolous response. I took the time, considered the possibilities, and I responded in the most appropriate and responsible way I knew at the time.

What the decision to say "yes" to writing a college textbook meant, however, and unknown at the time the decision was made, was being able to duck a number of other situations. For example, I was asked by one university to become a department chairman. That was an easy request to duck.

There were a number of reasons for saying "no": 1) First, and most important, taking on such a job is an enormous time consumer. 2) Being a chairman is, what a number of chairmen told me, a "thankless" job. 3) I wasn’t certain I was even qualified to become a chairman. Others thought I was qualified. I was not sure. 4) I much prefer the atmosphere of being a teacher and writer, not the public atmosphere of a chairmanship. 5) Having said "yes" to taking on the burden of writing a textbook, I knew that the additional time of a chairmanship would keep me from my family—and I had four young children at the time.

Ducking the request to be a chairman was not a simple, straightforward, easy decision. There is no doubt a chairmanship adds prestige. It is a significant addition to one’s resume. It can substantially add to one’s paycheck. And, probably most important, by being a chairman you can create change. You are in a position of influence, and if you believe in your subject, and you have faith in your department personnel, and you really want to make a difference, a chairmanship makes sense. Although it wasn’t of concern, it should be noted that being a chair can be a stepping stone to higher leadership positions—deanships or even presidents.

Sometimes, knowing when to duck requires listing the pros and cons and giving a great deal of consideration to that list, not just simply looking at the items but considering your own goals and mission, how the items on the list affect you personally—your family and friends—as well as how this may affect your future. Notice, once again, that knowing when to duck, is not a spur-of-the-moment, impulsive, spontaneous response. It is based on good reasons.

One of the things that helps when it comes to knowing when to duck, is to decide what is important to you. If you have well-defined goals—ideas that you want to accomplish—it makes it easier to know whether or not to duck.

The success of the Hybels/Weaver college textbook has actually made it easier to duck a raft of other requests. For example, at various times I was asked to take on department tasks. I have been asked for my opinion on a variety of books—mostly fiction. I do not have the time to read fiction, because of having a successful textbook, my time must be spent in reading books or other material that will contribute to my writing. I have been asked to give speeches, write recommendations, attend a variety of functions, and serve in efforts that I know, in advance, will require more time than I have available or want to spend.

What I discovered is a simple fact: You cannot be productive if you take on too many commitments. Not only will you not accomplish very much, but the quality also goes down. So, knowing when to duck will make your life better. You will be able to focus, become more efficient, lessen your stress, add quality to what you do, and become more productive.

By learning when to duck, you will add value to your life. You will have more time. You will feel confident about your priorities. And you will become more assertive. These are positive attributes that often need reinforcement or encouragement—even on a daily basis.

One of the ways I have learned to duck a request is the same response many use in a relationship to duck commitment—or remove themselves from that relationship. That is, "it’s not you, it’s me." I will say, "I realize that your project is a good one, but it’s just not right for me right now, at least not at this time." I have often used this response to duck telephone surveys about my feelings about a recently purchased product, the service I received at a particular institution, or how I stand politically on a wide variety of issues.

I have often said, "This isn’t the right fit for me," "It’s not what I’m looking for at this time," or "I just don’t feel right about this, but thank you for asking me"

One area where knowing when to duck is important is all the solicitors who come to your front door. We have people who want to mow our lawn, shovel our driveway, put new windows in, add a new roof, fertilize our lawn, construct a new room, contribute to their cause, or buy their products. It happens over and over. But, look at it in a different way. Think of these occurrences as opportunities to practice ducking. Be polite, of course, but be firm. Don’t apologize. Don’t allow unwanted front-door solicitors to take your time. Dispense with them as quickly and efficiently as you can.

One of the things I found, and you may have, too, that the more you accomplish, the more your accomplishments become known, the more likely it is that you will be asked to do more. The old cliche, "If you want something done, ask a busy person," applies here. Rather than shy away from being active, or trying to avoid having your accomplishments become known, the simple solution is to know when to duck—and duck effectively!

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At Pick Your Brain: Grow Yourself, the essay, "5 Ways to Escape Overwhelm," by Kat Eden suggests that you take a day off for evaluation, cut back your wish list, control your daily list, and accept failure as a good thing. Eden says, "Don’t forget that stress is supposed to be a positive thing—it challenges us, drives us to achieve and conquer."

At zenhabits, the essay, "The Essential Time-Saving Guide for Busy People," offers ten excellent "Tips for Work," six "Time-saving Computer Tips," and fourteen "Tips for Home."

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Copyright October, 2013, by And Then Some Publishing LLC

Quotations by Richard L. Weaver II

Beliefs are silent guides to your actions.


Boredom has many root causes, but you can eliminate it by activating your strengths, bolstering your sense of self-worth, and doing things that have meaning.


By giving up the security of a dull, monotonous, repetitive life, you take a chance at increasing your sense of wholeness---a life that is committed, positive, dedicated, and unconditional.

And Then Some News

The first paragraph of Thursday's essay, "Knowing when to duck," reads as follows:

It was totally unexpected. There was no warning and no way to predict it. Saundra Hybels, the former co-author of my college textbook, Communicating Effectively 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012)---she died unexpectedly in 1999—called me one day in 1972 and asked if I would be interested in writing a textbook with her. In retrospect, saying "yes" to her question was one of the most important responses I made in my professional life.

Succeeding when you’re supposed to fail: The 6 enduring principles of high achievement

By Ron Brafman
http://www.amazon.com/Succeeding-When-Youre-Supposed-ebook/dp/B004KPM144

Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

The eleven pages of notes (pp. 181-191) should really be called "Further Readings," not notes, because that is precisely what they are.

This is an easy, fun, quick book to read. It is well-written and full of interesting examples. Also, the way Brafman incorporates research throughout the book is both enlightening and informative.

Basically, this is a motivational book. If, for any reason, you are facing adversity in your life, you will find this book helpful.

If you want to know why some people who face adversity come out stronger because of it, or why some people who succeeded but were not supposed to now live their lives differently, or how you can stay strong when everything around you tries to pull you down, read this book.

Brafman is a working/practicing psychologist who holds a Ph.D. in psychology and has taught university courses in personality and personal growth.

His explanation of the differences between "externals" and "internals" was well explained; the discussion of the importance of having an even-tempered disposition was insightful (and how general temperaments, for the most part, follow individuals throughout their lives), and his discussion of the value of humor in boosting success and its role as an anxiety shield (how it protects people from the intensity of stress), was enlightening.

The author’s specific advice (pp. 164-167) is practical: 1) Shift the focus back to you, 2) Search out meaning, 3) Stay calm, 4) Stay the course, 5) Give yourself a break, 6) Don’t be afraid to use humor, 7) Be on the lookout for satellites (those who seem interested in you, or seem reliable, respectful, and willing to challenge you), and 8) Allow yourself to become inspired. This is useful advice.

There is advice, too, for employees (pp. 167-170), and for children (pp. 170-176) as well.

 Whether readers consider any of Brafman's advice "new," is not as relevant to me (for most of it is quite well known), as the contribution he makes to people's well-being.  Yes, this is a motivational book; however, it offers useful advice and can certainly lead some people out of adversity.  Besides, it's a fun read.

Friday Humor

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my children, friends, family and work.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

A thing of beauty

Often when we think of things of beauty we think of artwork, sculpture, musical compositions, or products we have created. And there is no doubt that within each of these categories and many more, there are truly things of beauty. Nature itself offers such a variety of objects and scenes. I remember, for example, going to a hosta and lily show at the Toledo Arboretum some time ago, and while touring one of the inside show areas I could not believe the overwhelming beauty of the show pieces displayed for competition.

My sister-in-law is an artist, and we have a mounted Wood Duck that she did as an exhibit in our living room. We have a chalk drawing she did of all the members of her side of our family including each of us. Every piece or project she has completed is breathtakingly beautiful.

There is so much beauty surrounding us all the time if we just take a moment to see and appreciate it.

I left the house at around 4 a.m. the other morning to begin my jog, and when I opened the front door, the fresh, crisp, clean morning air greeted me, and I had to stop, take a deep breath, close my eyes, and just appreciate the aroma, freshness, and ambience.

There are so many other situations that have the same effect on me.

When I designed a shed to house all of our grilling equipment from a design my older son gave me (in a book of things you could make from 2 x 4s), all the parts had to be cut first and only then could the shed be constructed. So, you do the measuring, make the cuts, lay out all of the parts and then attach them together. I not only found beauty in the final product—a useful, helpful, worthwhile storage place—but I loved the way all the parts came together so precisely and accurately.

I put together a large number of lectures, speeches, and essays. I do the research, construct the outline, then write out the information word-for-word. There is a time when I arrive at a point that everything just "feels right," everything seems to be in place, and I get a sense of closure when I actually feel I have manufactured a thing of beauty—concise, focused, centered.

When I am searching for information, I will often find a quotation that perfectly and completely fits a situation. For example, right now, a quotation from Christopher Morley serves that purpose well: "In every man’s heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty." Perfect! Beautiful!

The question, then, becomes a simple one: What are those things that cause my pulse to shake, quiver, and tremble? It can happen in the strangest places.

A vibration of beauty occurred when I had completed a repair job of our snowblower. It was leaking gas, so I ordered a plastic gas tank, spent several hours removing the plastic top of the snowblower, then the plastic tubing that connected to the tank. The leak was actually in one of the tube connections. The tubing had split. It was a thing of beauty when I had it all re-assembled, pulled the starter handle, and the mower started in one pull, and it never leaked again.

When we lived in Hawaii it was truly unusual to have beauty all around us. We went to several botanical gardens, and the lush landscapes, brilliant flowers, and unusual plants startle the imagination—and yet it is all so real.

Traveling to Jasper and Banff (the Canadian Rockies) out among the mountains, every time you turn a corner in the road, a new, fresh postcard seems to present itself.

When we traveled in upstate New York, the AuSable Chasm is the spectacular gorge that has been cut by the River.

On each of our cruise adventures, we have been exposed to true things of beauty. On our very first cruise (February, 2000) it was the ship itself, the Grand Princess, that was the primary thing of beauty. We had never been so close to such a large ship much less onboard one. And all the amenities—the lobby and elevators, the carpeting throughout, the massive dining-room areas, and the cafeteria were sights to behold!

Our second cruise was to the Panama Canal on the Sun Princess with Edgar and Zella Willis, my wife’s parents (January-February, 2002). The Panama Canal is a thing of beauty, and it wasn’t just moving through the locks to Lake Gatun, it was all the information we received about how they worked, given to us over a loudspeaker while out on deck watching it all work.

Our third cruise, with Celebrity on a ship called the Zenith (February, 2005) was to the Southern Caribbean. First, it was our self-guided tour of Old San Juan, Puerto Rico. Second, our stops in St. Kitts, St. Thomas, Granada, and Barbados. This was our first trip with the Alambre Trio (a singing group from the Phillippines) who learned a song just for us: "All I Have to Do is Dream" to which we did the cha-cha. The Trio is a thing of beauty! After Barbados, we went to Saint Maarten and Saint Martin (same island, two countries), and Cocoa Key. When you travel by cruise ship, take excursions on the islands, the things of beauty you experience never cease.

Our fourth cruise, on Celebrity’s Horizon, to Bermuda (July, 2005). Since we’d ben to Bermuda previously, our thing of beauty on this cruise was, once again, the Alambre Trio.

Our fifth cruise was "The Great Rivers of Europe" with Grand Circle, and the storybook-like European towns (e.g., Passau, Regensberg, and Wertheim, Germany), the 66 locks we traversed, the Melk Abbey, and the sights along the rivers (the Danube, Main, and Rhine) were things of beauty.

Cruise #6, Alaska’s Inside Passage, offers things of beauty all along the route, just as our Mediterranean cruise (cruise #8) offered them at every port-of-call (Barcelona, the French Riviera, Florence, Rome, Greece, Istanbul, Mykonos, Snatorini, and Venice) and on each excursion. Our cruise #10 was similar—things of beauty at every stop: Bangkok, Singapore, Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, Nha Trang, Vietnam, Hong Kong, Taipei, Taiwan, Okinawa, Japan, Shanghai, China, and Beijing, China—almost more things of beauty than a single mind can digest and appreciate.

Every stop on cruise #11, our South American adventure, offered places of beauty including Rio de Janeiro, Montavideo, Uruguay, Buenos Aires, Argentina, the Falkland Islands, Cape Horn and the glaciers, Puenta Arenas, Chile, Valparaiso, Vina del Mar, and Santiago, Chile. We experienced extraordinary beauty, too, on our trip to the Normandy area of France and at Versailles and all the sites in and around Paris.

If your goal is to see and appreciate things of beauty, you can begin appreciating that which surrounds you everyday, but if you want an onslaught of such things, travel. You will quickly discover, once you assume this new perspective, is that beauty in things lies in the mind which contemplates them—a second quotation that is a thing of beauty!

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At HubPages , there is a wonderful essay, "Photography Tips—Finding Beauty in Mundane Things." four specific tips for finding beauty. The author begins this essay saying, "When I started my photography adventures after retirement, I would always go out to my garden and take pictures of almost anything that I find there. Since I have a very small garden, most of my pictures were that of flowers, insects, raindrops and anything that catches my fancy. However, during times that the rain is too heavy for raindrops photos, I would wander inside the house and look for something to focus my camera on. That’s when I learned to focus on mundane things and find beauty in them. So how do we find beauty in mundane things?"

At "ThinkSimpleNow" , the name of the essay is "How to Find Beauty in Life," and Jonathan Mead offers readers three ways for seeing things differently: 1) Practice Listening, 2) Practice Non-Judgment, and 2) Open Your Heart. There are nine tips for daily living, and Mead closes by saying: "It’s through space that air fills your lungs. It’s through space that your body moves. It’s through space in the vibration of the air that sound is heard. It’s in the gaps between veins that blood flows. Without the space between these letters, there would be no words for you to read -it would all be incoherent.

In this way, you realize something—Emptiness truly roars. Silence speaks. Space gives birth to form. It’s in the gaps that beauty is found."

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Copyright October, 2013, by And Then Some Publishing LLC

　

Quotations by Richard L. Weaver II

Seek to improve on what you have done. Let your past provide the steps that lift you toward a better—more improved—future. When you improve on what you have done, you will see the results in a refreshed and reinvigorated outlook and point of view, and your life will change accordingly.

And Then Some News

The first two paragraphs of Thursday's essay, "A thing of beauty," read as follows:

Often when we think of things of beauty we think of artwork, sculpture, musical compositions, or products we have created. And there is no doubt that within each of these categories and many more, there are truly things of beauty. Nature itself offers such a variety of objects and scenes. I remember, for example, going to a hosta and lily show at the Toledo Arboretum some time ago, and while touring one of the inside show areas I could not believe the overwhelming beauty of the show pieces displayed for competition.

My sister-in-law is an artist, and we have a mounted Wood Duck that she did as an exhibit in our living room. We have a chalk drawing she did of all the members of her side of our family including each of us. Every piece or project she has completed is breathtakingly beautiful.

How to work for an idiot: Survive & thrive without killing your boss

By John Hoover

http://www.amazon.com/Revised-Expanded-Idiots-Insanity-Incompetency/dp/160163191X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328228522&sr=1-1

Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.

I absolutely loved Hoover’s sense of humor. Whether or not you have worked for an idiot, you are working for an idiot now, you know people who have worked for an idiot, or you know, up front, that YOU are an idiot, this book is for you.

Even the fact that Hoover uses himself as the foil, makes for delicious reading—a true verbal delicacy. His sense of humor is spread throughout this book. Here is just one of many, many, many possible choices:

"Did you notice that I tried to leave myself and my Inner Idiot out of that last rant? I can’t in good conscience do that. I might as well be honest, take my Inner Idiot by the hand, launch off the stage into the mosh pit, and join the party. I am recovering, but I’m still an Idiot. I try to never forget that I’ve been an Idiot employee, an Idiot Boss, an Idiot spouse, an Idiot student, and an Idiot teacher. I’ve been an equal-opportunity aggravation to more people than I care to count. Therefore, I invite you to join me, come clean, experience the cathasis of speaking openly about your idiot-syncrsies, and begin your own journey toward an Idiot-resistant experience" (p. 37).

Hoover’s writing style (i.e., caustic, sarcastic, witty, tongue-in-cheek, humorous, and sometimes honest-to-the-core—sometimes it’s hard to tell!) Leaves you breathless.

The advice, suggestions, and practical admonitions are engaging and surprisingly useful. He knows what he’s talking about, and despite his humor, his ideas (I determined) are quite accurate and worth trying.

I did get the feeling throughout that this book was a total cathartic release for Hoover. He may have started it being totally serious, but as he got farther and farther into the writing process, he found his niche, a channel for his muse, and just let go! Look at the following example:

"Be thankful for small blessings. Unlike the God, Machiavellian, Sadistic, Masochistic, Paranoid, Reluctant, Unprepared, and Buddy Bosses, the I-Boss is simply a chronically clueless mutant from the evolutionary journey of the species. The wagon of human development hit a bump somewhere, and the I-Boss was left sitting in the middle of the road in a cloud of dust, rubbing the bump on his head. From there, he wandered into a nearby office to use the toilet and, before long, was running it—the office, that is. This is the real world" (p. 71).

The nice thing about this book is that Hoover does not leave readers high and dry. Chapter 8, "A Strategic Partnership," (pp. 203-216), Chapter 9, "Idiot-Speak: How to Talk to Your Idiot Boss," (pp. 217-232) and Chapter 10, "Idiot-Eat: How to Break Bread With Your Idiot Boss," (233-246) are practical, useful, and specific, and they offer valuable information.

This book merits a five-star rating out of five stars---maybe even a six!  Or, is that just me being an idiot?

Friday Humor

11. Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
~ Jack Benny

12. There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground.~ Ben Hogan

13. Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best.
~ Jack Nicklaus

14. The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.
~ H. G. Wells

15. I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers everywhere except on the course.
~ Billy Graham

16. If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
~ Bob Hope

17. While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
~ Henny Youngman

18. If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~ Jack Lemmon

19. You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
~ Lee Trevino

20. I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.
~ Lee Trevino

To this very day

Essay by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
 
I was standing in line at the post office waiting to mail a copy of my book, Exotic Destinations (And Then Some Publishing LLC, 2011) to my sister in Kanab, Utah, and as I looked back to see how many people were lined up behind me, a woman caught my eye. She was staring at me as if looking at someone she knew well. While looking at her (I was a bit perplexed), she slowly raised her right hand to her mouth, put her thumb behind her front teeth, curled her index finger over the front of her teeth, then thrust her hand out as she pointed at me with her index finger as if saying to me, "Yes, you!"

Suddenly it dawned on me. That woman in line was a student of mine more than 20 years ago. Not only was she enrolled in my required, basic, speech-communication class at Bowling Green State University, but she was present for my once-in-a-lifetime, lecture experience.

To relate this experience, I need to do two things: First, I need to tell you a story. Second, to tell this story I need to quote from a speech I gave. These two things are directly related, because the story is the final portion of the speech.

I gave this speech almost a half-dozen years ago. The title is "Sticky Ideas: Low-Tech Solutions to a High-Tech Problem," and it was published in Vital Speeches of the Day (August 1, 2007, pp. 73-78. The speech was then reprinted (with permission) in a popular textbook, Public Speaking: An Audience-Centered Approach 8e, by Steven A. and Susan J. Beebe (Boston: Pearson, 2012), pp.410-414. The only reason I mention the publication of the speech is that Vital Speeches is a prestigious place for getting a speech published, and Beebe and Beebe’s textbook is one of the top textbooks in the field of speech communication. To be selected to be one of only five sample "Speeches for Analysis and Discussion" in a 440-page textbook (in an 8½-inch x 11-inch format—larger than the normal size of textbooks) and one of those five speeches is Martin Luther King Jr.’s "I Have a Dream" speech, shows you what professional writers in the speech-communication discipline think of this "Sticky Ideas" speech.

Now, for the story. I quote the speech directly:

"To preface my story, you need to know that one of the major fears people have about giving a speech is: "What happens if I forget what I’m going to say?" or "What happens if I lose my place?" or "What happens if I draw a complete blank?" It is the fear of what do I do in case of an emergency—or, I don’t want to lose face in front of my listeners, especially if they are a group of my peers.

"What you see before you right now is a handicapped person—especially handicapped when it comes to being a public speaker. (Pointing to my four front teeth) I have no front teeth. The situation is in the process of being remedied; my son-in-law is an oral surgeon, and he is making implants to support permanent front teeth, but let me get back to the story.

"About fifty years ago, when I worked at one of the first McDonald’s restaurants—the first one in Ann Arbor, Michigan—a couple of us workers were fooling around in the back room fighting. Suddenly, and without warning, a worker by the name of Sonny, raised up his elbow and broke off my front teeth. That began close to fifty years of difficulty.

"What the dentist did was to use the good roots of the teeth to drive pegs into them to support pegged teeth. My two front teeth were pegged together along with my lateral incisors—for those of you into the language of dentists.

"Well, one day while lecturing, the pegs came loose, and the teeth would not stay in place, so that when I talked, the teeth would drop down into my mouth. Now, what I have not told you about my lecture situation is that I had to give the exact same lecture five times a week because Bowling Green, at that time, did not have a venue large enough to hold all the students enrolled—close to 1500 students. There were just over 300 students present on this particular day, and I could not postpone or delay the lecture; I had to proceed forward and finish the remaining 30 minutes of lecture material, because they would be held responsible for it on the next exam.

"I had no choice, so I removed the teeth, and I talked for 30 minutes without my front teeth. Since I made light of the situation, so did my students, and with every lisp we all laughed at first until we became accustomed to it—together.

"But, what I did at the close of the lecture—something that occurred to me right off the top of my head—I would like to do now with everyone here and everyone who may read this speech in the future. Here is what I told my students: Because this is a unique experience—it has never happened to me before, and I hope it never happens again, to be sure—I think we should have a way to signal each other. That is, you should have a way to tell me if we ever meet again, that you were part of this very special experience. So, using the thumb of your right hand, place it behind your front teeth and curl your index finger over the front of your front teeth. Then, bring them forward as if you were taking them out and uncurl your index finger and point right at me.

"For several years after that experience, I would meet students on the sidewalks, in restaurants and stores, even once at Cedar Point, and we would share that special time, and we would simply smile—knowing that we had shared a secret message that both of us understood. Now, you have a way, too, to share this special time."

Standing in line at the post office, close to twenty years after this happened (I have a set of four, implanted teeth securely in place as I write this essay), was totally unexpected, caught me completely by surprise, and brought back those vivid memories of standing in front of 300-350 students at a time, giving lectures on speech communication.

One has no idea the emotional impact that such an experience can have on students. To this day, I’m amazed. I am also pleased that I retired from teaching in 1996 and now write full time. To this very day, this was the worst lecture experience I had during my 22 years as a large-group lecturer, and the worst, too, after teaching close to 80,000 students over 30 years of teaching experience.

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At Wikipedia , the essay "Emotion and Memory," explains how emotions can have a profound effect on memory.

Helena M. Mentis, Human-Computer Interfaces Group, Lockheed Martin – Maritime Systems and Sensors, in her essay, "Insight into Strong Emotional Experiences Through Memory," discusses a number of relevant issues: "Numerous studies have shown that emotionally rich events in one’s life are remembered more often and with more clarity and detail. . . Other studies have supported these findings and assert that the type of emotion is not as important as the level of arousal when the memory is formed. . . . More importantly, emotionally tagged memories seem to be forgotten more slowly then those formed at a time of less intense affect."

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Copyright October, 2013, by And Then Some Publishing LLC

　

Quotations by Richard L. Weaver II

Persist, persevere, find the possible.

And Then Some News

The first paragraph of Thursday's essay,"To this very day," reads as follows:

I was standing in line at the post office waiting to mail a copy of my book, Exotic Destinations (And Then Some Publishing LLC, 2011) to my sister in Kanab, Utah, and as I looked back to see how many people were lined up behind me, a woman caught my eye. She was staring at me as if looking at someone she knew well. While looking at her (I was a bit perplexed), she slowly raised her right hand to her mouth, put her thumb behind her front teeth, curled her index finger over the front of her teeth, then thrust her hand out as she pointed at me with her index finger as if saying to me, "Yes, you!"