How to click with people: The secret to better relationships in business and in life

How to click with people: The secret to better relationships in business and in life
By Rick Kirschner

Book review by Richard L. Weaver II

The first thing I looked for when I opened this book was a section on “Notes,” or “References,” or “Other Readings,” or anything that would give you a clue that Kirschner reached outside of himself and his own personal resources to write this book.  There are none at all.  There isn’t even an index to the book.

The second thing I looked for when I opened this book—after finding no sources of any kind!—was the degree to which Kirschner’s information is accurate.  I think there is no question on this; however, I found most of what he said to be common sense and common knowledge.  Anyone who operates in the world today—in any capacity, I might add—knows and uses this information.  Do we need it codified for us?  Probably not.  Does Kirschner add anything to the communication world?  Not very much.

All that being said, did I find Kirschner’s suggestions for dealing with troublesome others to be valuable or even useful.  Yes, I did.  And I believe that any book, article, set of information, or advice that helps people get along well (or better) with others is worthwhile. This book is full of hundreds of practical, useful suggestions for getting along well with others.

In Chapter 7, “Clicking Electronically,” I found it interesting that Kirschner deals with clicking over the phone, clicking using e-mail, and clicking when using social networks, however, he never mentions clicking via texting.  Admittedly, many of the suggestions for clicking using e-mail would be useful and appropriate, but a separate section on texting would make the book more up-to-date.

What I appreciated throughout the book was Kirschner’s emphasis on the importance of listening.  Despite the context, everyone is likely to fair better if he or she begins with a listening perspective.  He reveals the importance of listening by offering “A Short Course on Listening,” in Chapter 3, then refers back to that information throughout this 254-page book.

This is a “how-to” book designed for beginners—those with little or no experience in the world of relationships, getting along with others, making connections, being successful, developing meaningful associations, and communicating effectively.

One of the keys to success is captured by Kirscher when he says, “Stumbling blocks can cause a lot of frustration, and removing the stumbling block may require patience, flexibility, and determination” (p. 218).  Patience, flexibility, and determination—no matter the context, issue, or people involved—is what effectiveness is all about.  Often, we demand instant success or instant results, and the world of getting along with others doesn’t usually operate at that speed.