Q: How many egomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the rest of the world revolves around him.
Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet
Day 2 from our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Spring 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
When all else fails...
by Richard L. Weaver II
What people of every age need to know is that they have resources beyond which they understand, appreciate, or use; thus, when all else fails, to depend on these resources may well overcome the restriction, resolve the problem, make the right choice clear, or offer the alternative that leads the way out of the dilemma.
If everyone followed (or has followed) the advice in this essay, many of their resources would already be clear because they would be often practiced and, thus, known.
In my essay, “Good, memorable advice from a father and grandfather to a younger generation,” from the book (and formerly published in The (Toledo) Blade), And Then Some: Essays to Entertain, Motivate, & Inspire there are at least 20 pieces of specific advice. That essay is an excellent place to begin for it talks of opportunity, knowledge, hard work, bouncing back, staying informed, friendship, health, responsibility, happiness, and much more. This one proceeds from where that one left off with some small amount of overlap.
When all else fails begins with belief in yourself and your abilities. Nothing else that follows here matters when there is no self-efficacy. It is the essential and fundamental cornerstone of any edifice. You must convince yourself subconsciously that you can achieve what you set out to do. In that way your efforts will be boosted and the results will reaffirm your self belief and strengthen your trust in yourself as well as your self-confidence.
Closely related to a belief in yourself is thinking of the world in a positive way. If you have a positive outlook, you will feel it. Sometimes you have to pretend, and that’s okay. When you have a smile on your face, nobody knows what’s going on inside. Also, when you’re optimistic and encouraging (reinforcing the smile on your face), others respond to what they see, and, like a self-fulfilling prophecy, it begins to take hold within you, and you begin to believe that you are truly positive and optimistic — no matter how you felt in the beginning.
When all else fails, friendships will pull you through. When you’re a good friend, someone others can count on, you will attract people who are good friends: honest, true, faithful and fun. True friends not only stand the test of time, but they will be by your side time and time again — there for you when all else fails.
When all else fails, too, persistence pays off. There are many reasons people fear failure — how society rewards success, the disapproval and deprivation associated with it, how it may expose their unworthiness. Quitters, however, never win and winners never quit. Thus, success means trying again, and trying again, and.... When you are at bat, it is better to go down swinging than just holding the bat and wondering what happened. It feels better to try something and fail than not to try at all, because if you are afraid to fail you are likely to become afraid of acting. That’s how drop outs occur; that’s how people avoid risks; and that’s the way to sidestep any new situations. Until you face your fear — Who taught it to you? Are others being overly judgmental or perfectionistic? Are you letting someone push you to succeed in ways not right for you? — you will avoid the important growth, development, and change that comes from taking risks, confronting new situations, and persisting through failures and disappointments.
When all else fails, drop back to the goals you have for yourself. You need to have goals — both short and long term. It doesn’t matter what they are, you need to work towards them. Your goals will change with new knowledge, experiences, relationships, and successes. However, when you set goals, really put in the time and energy needed to accomplish what you want. Expect action from yourself knowing that you have the ability, self-discipline, and self-motivation to accomplish whatever you want.
When you are having difficulty achieving your goals, engage in self-assessment. Ask yourself the questions: Are your goals appropriate? Are your standards the right ones for your life? Are they really your standards? Give yourself a chance to grow and develop in ability. Don’t take on excessive tasks or aim for unreachable achievements; go step by step.
When all else fails, remember that you are more than what you do or make. Beware of defining yourself only as the sum of your achievements or the bottom line of your financial status or even of the trips, clothes, friends, or possessions you accumulate. You will always be a growing, changing, developing person who can learn from all the experiences of your life, even the unpleasant ones. When all else fails, consider what you can learn from what is taking place now? When all else fails, view it as part of the process of exploring your world; make a note of its lessons and move on. Often, the lessons of a past failure pave the way for a future successes.
When all else fails, too, make adjustments in the myths that guide your life. For example, you do not have to be the best to be acceptable. Anything less than perfection isn’t failure. Worldly success isn’t everything. More important than worldly success is developing loving and supportive personal relationships, gradually improving your skills and abilities, learning to try new — and therefore risky — ventures.
When all else fails, look for the simpler way, answer, approach, alternative, or solution. Everything doesn’t have to be difficult, complicated, or troublesome. For example, be accepting of others and yourself just the way you are. You are enough. You are always enough. Depend on yourself for your own happiness. Live and let live. Celebrate all those things about yourself and others that make you and them unique.
When all else fails, look at yourself. Your insides are so much more important than your outsides — what you reveal to the world. It’s your brain, kindness, empathy, and sense of humor
that make you who you are. If you love to do something, do it. This is your life, your time to be alive. Try everything and anything (as long as it’s safe), and open yourself to all kinds of adventures. Make good choices, of course, but make the choices — and don’t wait.
Finally, when all else fails, look at the lighter side. Step outside of yourself, and see the humor in what you do, how you act, and who you are. Have fun. Whatever your fun might be, delight in life. Smile. Giggle. Laugh. (Roar! Hoot! Howl!) Life is too short not to have fun. Fun isn’t a feeling, it's a mindset. You control what's fun and what's not. Even cleaning can be fun, because if you tell yourself, this is fun, it becomes fun! Think about it! The reason you find anything fun is because you tell yourself it’s fun! So why not do that with everything in life and have a blast all day long?
-----
At Psychology Today Blogs, Timothy A. Pychyl has an essay, “Structured Procrastination: When all else fails,” in which he summarizes what John Perry, a professor of philosophy at Stanford University, says in his web essay and on his “Philosophy Talk” podcast - "the program that questions everything --- except your intelligence." Pychyl’s summary is enjoyable, and Perry’s theory has some merit.
At CelebrateLove.com, Larry James has an essay that deals with relationships entitled, “. . . And If All Else Fails,” in which he begins by asking: “When you have done the best you can, and your relationship seems to be falling apart at the seams, what other possibilities exist? What can you do when you have difficulty sustaining intimacy in your relationship?” James advocates counseling, and he ends his essay saying: “So, if you want to work things out, dump your preconceived ideas about what people will think or what your love partner will think if you choose to pursue therapy on your own. They are going to think whatever they think and there isn't anything that you can do about it. Besides, it doesn't matter what they think. It's your problem. You must do what you must do.”
For sheer fun, when all else fails, I recommend the book How to be funny on purpose: Creating and consuming humor, by Edgar E. Willis. It will bring humor into your life in a big way!
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
What people of every age need to know is that they have resources beyond which they understand, appreciate, or use; thus, when all else fails, to depend on these resources may well overcome the restriction, resolve the problem, make the right choice clear, or offer the alternative that leads the way out of the dilemma.
If everyone followed (or has followed) the advice in this essay, many of their resources would already be clear because they would be often practiced and, thus, known.
In my essay, “Good, memorable advice from a father and grandfather to a younger generation,” from the book (and formerly published in The (Toledo) Blade), And Then Some: Essays to Entertain, Motivate, & Inspire there are at least 20 pieces of specific advice. That essay is an excellent place to begin for it talks of opportunity, knowledge, hard work, bouncing back, staying informed, friendship, health, responsibility, happiness, and much more. This one proceeds from where that one left off with some small amount of overlap.
When all else fails begins with belief in yourself and your abilities. Nothing else that follows here matters when there is no self-efficacy. It is the essential and fundamental cornerstone of any edifice. You must convince yourself subconsciously that you can achieve what you set out to do. In that way your efforts will be boosted and the results will reaffirm your self belief and strengthen your trust in yourself as well as your self-confidence.
Closely related to a belief in yourself is thinking of the world in a positive way. If you have a positive outlook, you will feel it. Sometimes you have to pretend, and that’s okay. When you have a smile on your face, nobody knows what’s going on inside. Also, when you’re optimistic and encouraging (reinforcing the smile on your face), others respond to what they see, and, like a self-fulfilling prophecy, it begins to take hold within you, and you begin to believe that you are truly positive and optimistic — no matter how you felt in the beginning.
When all else fails, friendships will pull you through. When you’re a good friend, someone others can count on, you will attract people who are good friends: honest, true, faithful and fun. True friends not only stand the test of time, but they will be by your side time and time again — there for you when all else fails.
When all else fails, too, persistence pays off. There are many reasons people fear failure — how society rewards success, the disapproval and deprivation associated with it, how it may expose their unworthiness. Quitters, however, never win and winners never quit. Thus, success means trying again, and trying again, and.... When you are at bat, it is better to go down swinging than just holding the bat and wondering what happened. It feels better to try something and fail than not to try at all, because if you are afraid to fail you are likely to become afraid of acting. That’s how drop outs occur; that’s how people avoid risks; and that’s the way to sidestep any new situations. Until you face your fear — Who taught it to you? Are others being overly judgmental or perfectionistic? Are you letting someone push you to succeed in ways not right for you? — you will avoid the important growth, development, and change that comes from taking risks, confronting new situations, and persisting through failures and disappointments.
When all else fails, drop back to the goals you have for yourself. You need to have goals — both short and long term. It doesn’t matter what they are, you need to work towards them. Your goals will change with new knowledge, experiences, relationships, and successes. However, when you set goals, really put in the time and energy needed to accomplish what you want. Expect action from yourself knowing that you have the ability, self-discipline, and self-motivation to accomplish whatever you want.
When you are having difficulty achieving your goals, engage in self-assessment. Ask yourself the questions: Are your goals appropriate? Are your standards the right ones for your life? Are they really your standards? Give yourself a chance to grow and develop in ability. Don’t take on excessive tasks or aim for unreachable achievements; go step by step.
When all else fails, remember that you are more than what you do or make. Beware of defining yourself only as the sum of your achievements or the bottom line of your financial status or even of the trips, clothes, friends, or possessions you accumulate. You will always be a growing, changing, developing person who can learn from all the experiences of your life, even the unpleasant ones. When all else fails, consider what you can learn from what is taking place now? When all else fails, view it as part of the process of exploring your world; make a note of its lessons and move on. Often, the lessons of a past failure pave the way for a future successes.
When all else fails, too, make adjustments in the myths that guide your life. For example, you do not have to be the best to be acceptable. Anything less than perfection isn’t failure. Worldly success isn’t everything. More important than worldly success is developing loving and supportive personal relationships, gradually improving your skills and abilities, learning to try new — and therefore risky — ventures.
When all else fails, look for the simpler way, answer, approach, alternative, or solution. Everything doesn’t have to be difficult, complicated, or troublesome. For example, be accepting of others and yourself just the way you are. You are enough. You are always enough. Depend on yourself for your own happiness. Live and let live. Celebrate all those things about yourself and others that make you and them unique.
When all else fails, look at yourself. Your insides are so much more important than your outsides — what you reveal to the world. It’s your brain, kindness, empathy, and sense of humor
that make you who you are. If you love to do something, do it. This is your life, your time to be alive. Try everything and anything (as long as it’s safe), and open yourself to all kinds of adventures. Make good choices, of course, but make the choices — and don’t wait.
Finally, when all else fails, look at the lighter side. Step outside of yourself, and see the humor in what you do, how you act, and who you are. Have fun. Whatever your fun might be, delight in life. Smile. Giggle. Laugh. (Roar! Hoot! Howl!) Life is too short not to have fun. Fun isn’t a feeling, it's a mindset. You control what's fun and what's not. Even cleaning can be fun, because if you tell yourself, this is fun, it becomes fun! Think about it! The reason you find anything fun is because you tell yourself it’s fun! So why not do that with everything in life and have a blast all day long?
-----
At Psychology Today Blogs, Timothy A. Pychyl has an essay, “Structured Procrastination: When all else fails,” in which he summarizes what John Perry, a professor of philosophy at Stanford University, says in his web essay and on his “Philosophy Talk” podcast - "the program that questions everything --- except your intelligence." Pychyl’s summary is enjoyable, and Perry’s theory has some merit.
At CelebrateLove.com, Larry James has an essay that deals with relationships entitled, “. . . And If All Else Fails,” in which he begins by asking: “When you have done the best you can, and your relationship seems to be falling apart at the seams, what other possibilities exist? What can you do when you have difficulty sustaining intimacy in your relationship?” James advocates counseling, and he ends his essay saying: “So, if you want to work things out, dump your preconceived ideas about what people will think or what your love partner will think if you choose to pursue therapy on your own. They are going to think whatever they think and there isn't anything that you can do about it. Besides, it doesn't matter what they think. It's your problem. You must do what you must do.”
For sheer fun, when all else fails, I recommend the book How to be funny on purpose: Creating and consuming humor, by Edgar E. Willis. It will bring humor into your life in a big way!
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." ---Chinese Proverb
Day #121 - Be willing to ask questions.
Day #121 - Be willing to ask questions.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 30-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 30-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
News... And Then Some!
News... And Then Some!
Staff Writer, Anthony Weaver
Our apologies... And Then Some! There's been a lot going on around And Then Some Publishing, LLC, yet we haven't kept you in the loop. It's time to change that!
Let me bring you up to date on the many projects in the works. There are changes coming to our websites, blogs, and basically our overall presence on the internet. We have multiple upcoming books, more videos being processed, and... and... and...
You guessed it: And Then Some!
-----
And Then Some Publishing Menu
Tempt your palette with a taste that suits you!
I. Books Update
A. Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform: A Memoir of World War II by Edgar E. Willis
1. And Then Some Publishing planned to publish this memoir on March 1, 2010. We’ve exceeded our expectations... It’s available now at Amazon!
2. Find out more: EdgarEWillis.com.
a. Quick links to Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform book at Amazon.
b. Table of Contents
c. Chapter excerpts
B. Special Delivery: A Baby Memory Book - for girls or boys
1. This is a full color 8.5" x 11" inch book that begs Mom and Dad to write their thoughts from the first time they knew you were on the way! We are producing a book for either girl or boy.
a. A huge project is coming to a close. We are about to release this book... Yup!.... For REAL folks. It's been a crazy long, huge process where all involved have learned a lot!
2. We have an outside shot at making our February 1st deadline to make these books available at Amazon.com.
3. Updates: ProductsThatPamper.com
II. Videos
A. New videos are being written, filmed, and processed!
1. How-To Paint from ~ANT
2. Videos on how to have fun painting with easy to do projects at home.
B. Covering subjects from public speaking and relationships from Richard L. Weaver II
1. New videos expanding on comments from YouTube plus more about relationships.
C. How to Be Funny on Purpose: An Anatomy of Humor from Edgar E. Willis
1. This is a great video breaking down humor from 1995.
2. Currently the video is being broken down into sections to fit with YouTube.
3. Pay attention... there are a couple sex jokes!!
4. Learn why and how jokes are funny... pay attention to this series of videos. Visit EdgarEWillis.com and for the expected release dates!
III. Websites
A. All websites are going through updates. Not only are we updating websites with new material, we are adding more websites to the AndThenSomePublishing.com portfolio!
B. Our blogs will be seeing an upcoming change. We produce many tasty flavors of posts whether you like web tech, art, jokes, or a delicious SMOERs! We are getting prepared to give you just what you want.
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Thursday’s essay is called, “When all else fails...,” and it introduces you to all the resources you possess right now (and ones that you can secure in quick fashion) that you can always fall back on in emergencies, in times of need, or when all else fails.
When all else fails...
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Finally, when all else fails, look at the lighter side. Step outside of yourself, and see the humor in what you do, how you act, and who you are. Have fun. Whatever your fun might be, delight in life. Smile. Giggle. Laugh. (Roar! Hoot! Howl!) Life is too short not to have fun. Fun isn’t a feeling, it's a mindset. You control what's fun and what's not. Even cleaning can be fun, because if you tell yourself, this is fun, it becomes fun! Think about it! The reason you find anything fun is because you tell yourself it’s fun! So why not do that with everything in life and have a blast all day long?
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Staff Writer, Anthony Weaver
Our apologies... And Then Some! There's been a lot going on around And Then Some Publishing, LLC, yet we haven't kept you in the loop. It's time to change that!
Let me bring you up to date on the many projects in the works. There are changes coming to our websites, blogs, and basically our overall presence on the internet. We have multiple upcoming books, more videos being processed, and... and... and...
You guessed it: And Then Some!
-----
And Then Some Publishing Menu
Tempt your palette with a taste that suits you!
I. Books Update
A. Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform: A Memoir of World War II by Edgar E. Willis
1. And Then Some Publishing planned to publish this memoir on March 1, 2010. We’ve exceeded our expectations... It’s available now at Amazon!
2. Find out more: EdgarEWillis.com.
a. Quick links to Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform book at Amazon.
b. Table of Contents
c. Chapter excerpts
B. Special Delivery: A Baby Memory Book - for girls or boys
1. This is a full color 8.5" x 11" inch book that begs Mom and Dad to write their thoughts from the first time they knew you were on the way! We are producing a book for either girl or boy.
a. A huge project is coming to a close. We are about to release this book... Yup!.... For REAL folks. It's been a crazy long, huge process where all involved have learned a lot!
2. We have an outside shot at making our February 1st deadline to make these books available at Amazon.com.
3. Updates: ProductsThatPamper.com
II. Videos
A. New videos are being written, filmed, and processed!
1. How-To Paint from ~ANT
2. Videos on how to have fun painting with easy to do projects at home.
B. Covering subjects from public speaking and relationships from Richard L. Weaver II
1. New videos expanding on comments from YouTube plus more about relationships.
C. How to Be Funny on Purpose: An Anatomy of Humor from Edgar E. Willis
1. This is a great video breaking down humor from 1995.
2. Currently the video is being broken down into sections to fit with YouTube.
3. Pay attention... there are a couple sex jokes!!
4. Learn why and how jokes are funny... pay attention to this series of videos. Visit EdgarEWillis.com and for the expected release dates!
III. Websites
A. All websites are going through updates. Not only are we updating websites with new material, we are adding more websites to the AndThenSomePublishing.com portfolio!
B. Our blogs will be seeing an upcoming change. We produce many tasty flavors of posts whether you like web tech, art, jokes, or a delicious SMOERs! We are getting prepared to give you just what you want.
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Thursday’s essay is called, “When all else fails...,” and it introduces you to all the resources you possess right now (and ones that you can secure in quick fashion) that you can always fall back on in emergencies, in times of need, or when all else fails.
When all else fails...
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Finally, when all else fails, look at the lighter side. Step outside of yourself, and see the humor in what you do, how you act, and who you are. Have fun. Whatever your fun might be, delight in life. Smile. Giggle. Laugh. (Roar! Hoot! Howl!) Life is too short not to have fun. Fun isn’t a feeling, it's a mindset. You control what's fun and what's not. Even cleaning can be fun, because if you tell yourself, this is fun, it becomes fun! Think about it! The reason you find anything fun is because you tell yourself it’s fun! So why not do that with everything in life and have a blast all day long?
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Book Club... And Then Some!
Book Review Mondays is now Book Club... And Then Some!
Staff Writer - Anthony Weaver
Every Monday you're used to book reviews. Please be patient. The reviews will begin again on Monday February 1, 2010 with special reviews of Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform: A World War II Memoir by Edgar E. Willis.
And Then Some Publishing also changed to our newly named website BookClubAndThenSome.com. It looks similar to the old BookWorksRules website with only minor graphics replaced, however changes are afoot! We'll keep you updated as we continue the progress.
There's a lot going on inside And Then Some Publishing, LLC. Folks... three books are about to be released! We'll get you up-to-date tomorrow in the And Then Some Publishing News.
Staff Writer - Anthony Weaver
Every Monday you're used to book reviews. Please be patient. The reviews will begin again on Monday February 1, 2010 with special reviews of Civilian in an Ill-fitting Uniform: A World War II Memoir by Edgar E. Willis.
And Then Some Publishing also changed to our newly named website BookClubAndThenSome.com. It looks similar to the old BookWorksRules website with only minor graphics replaced, however changes are afoot! We'll keep you updated as we continue the progress.
There's a lot going on inside And Then Some Publishing, LLC. Folks... three books are about to be released! We'll get you up-to-date tomorrow in the And Then Some Publishing News.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow
Psychiatry students were in their Emkotional Extremes class. "Let's set some parameters," the professor said.
"What's the opposite of joy?" he asked one student.
"Sadness," he replied.
"The opposite of depression?" he asked another student.
"Elation," he replied.
"The opposite of woe?" the prof asked a young woman from Texas.
The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddyup."
This joke is from "Day 1" of the new book soon to be published by And Then Some Publishing, LLC. The book is called, LAUGH LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW: OVER 2,000 JOKES FROM THE INTERNET, and the jokes have been collected by Richard L. Weaver II. You liked and responded well to our book SMOERs: SELF-MOTIVATION, OPTIMISM, ENCOURAGEMENT, RULES, daily reminders for outstanding living. SMOERs included over 1600 quotations and was arranged day-by-day (365 days) with quotations arranged under each day. The set-up for the book LAUGH is similar. It is arranged day-by-day (365 days) with jokes arranged under each day---approximately 4.5 jokes per day. (Incidentally, the words of wisdom published on the blog every Wednesday are taken from the book SMOERs; thus, you have some excellent samples available.)
Weekend Words
"Use what language you will, you can never say anything but what you are." ---Ralph Waldo Emerson
"What's the opposite of joy?" he asked one student.
"Sadness," he replied.
"The opposite of depression?" he asked another student.
"Elation," he replied.
"The opposite of woe?" the prof asked a young woman from Texas.
The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddyup."
This joke is from "Day 1" of the new book soon to be published by And Then Some Publishing, LLC. The book is called, LAUGH LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW: OVER 2,000 JOKES FROM THE INTERNET, and the jokes have been collected by Richard L. Weaver II. You liked and responded well to our book SMOERs: SELF-MOTIVATION, OPTIMISM, ENCOURAGEMENT, RULES, daily reminders for outstanding living. SMOERs included over 1600 quotations and was arranged day-by-day (365 days) with quotations arranged under each day. The set-up for the book LAUGH is similar. It is arranged day-by-day (365 days) with jokes arranged under each day---approximately 4.5 jokes per day. (Incidentally, the words of wisdom published on the blog every Wednesday are taken from the book SMOERs; thus, you have some excellent samples available.)
Weekend Words
"Use what language you will, you can never say anything but what you are." ---Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thursday, January 21, 2010
The should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of your life
by Richard L. Weaver II
The slogan, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life,” may be just a popular aphorism, but it carries great strength and importance when it comes to dealing with the “should haves,” “could haves,” “if onlys,” and “what ifs” of our lives. It’s not easy to release our old hurts, sadnesses, imbalances, and injustices in our lives from our past and present. Think of the power and effect that a broken marriage, a serious and debilitating illness, a serious car accident, or financial ruin can have on us now and in the future.
We all have moments in our lives that can be categorized into regrets that make us think about how different our lives would be if only XYZ had (or hadn’t) happened. It could be something as simple as “if only I had learned how to type” or as thought-provoking as “if only the first plane had missed the Tower.”
Release yourself from the pain of the past, and focus on the future.
There is no doubt our lives could be significantly different if only XYZ had (or hadn’t) happened, and we can spend enormous amounts of time imagining the various scenarios and even slipping into those fantasies. Whether there was a specific moment or some definite detail, we could have done something different, and it is even likely that this moment or detail would have made us a completely different person than we are today. Since this is true, and since the past remains the past and cannot be altered today in any way, why waste the time? We need to learn what we can learn from the past, and then move on. After all, think about it, will focusing on the should haves, could haves, if onlys and what ifs of our life change anything?
Spend some time (if necessary) — but limit it — to sorting out the reasons why what happened in the past happened. Search yourself carefully and honestly, and examine your intentions and motives. These answers may be important guides for you when you reach a crossroads point again. But, once this short and limited process of self-examination is complete then close the door, and spend no more time on it. Refocus.
Keep in constant touch with what makes you feel good about yourself. Savor all the small pleasures and successes that come your way. List the ways you naturally succeed in living a satisfying life even in humble and inconspicuous ways. You are doing the best you can so far, given what you know about yourself and life.
How do you overcome the regrets of the past? First, stay active — whatever you do, don’t drop out, lapse into obscurity, distance yourself, hide from your problems, sequester yourself, lie low, or go underground. This is no time for passivity and self-pity. One of the best ways you have for avoiding thoughts about “what might have been” is to keep your mind active and focused on other things.
How do you keep your mind active and focused on other things? Continue to be a creative, giving person by putting extra effort into personal relationships and helping others. Enjoy the comfort and warmth of your family and friendships. Help your children with their homework, or play games with them. Help your spouse with some project you’ve been putting off. Play tennis with your spouse or friends. Do volunteer work.
If you can afford to, refresh and nurture yourself by taking a vacation now. Take your camper and go fishing. Visit friends who live in Hawaii. See the Grand Canyon. Take a self-improvement course, or enroll in a course designed to hone and polish your skills. Jog, swim, bowl, paint the house, coach Little League. Spend time teaching your kids how to do something special. Remain positive, strong, and confident.
If you know that you’re going to have free time on your hands, create an agenda of things to do. Plan the time carefully by laying out a schedule, getting up early, following the schedule, and staying on track. Don’t sleep all day, overeat, over drink, or complain excessively. These are self-defeating behaviors that should trigger a need to get back to your schedule.
Keep your morale high. Do things that make your mind and body feel good. Learn techniques of relaxing, such as meditation, deep breathing, and yoga. Read the classics, or biographies of people who not only interest but inspire you.
Examine your feelings about being a success and what your criteria for success include. Perhaps the idea of high achievement — in whatever area of life — makes you uneasy. Don’t overrate the value of worldly success. Don’t let the pursuit of success replace more important goals such as developing loving and supportive relationships, gradually improving your skills and abilities, or learning to try new — and therefore risky — ventures. Beware of defining yourself only as the sum of your achievements. You are more than what you do or make. You are more than the money you earn — or the trips, clothes, friends, or possessions you accumulate. You are a growing person who can learn from all the experiences of your life, even the unpleasant ones. Give yourself credit for wanting to grow, develop, and change in new, positive ways.
Here is an important guide that can help you as you proceed in life. If your goal is to face anything in your life that comes your way — what life dishes out — with all the vigor, strength, and ability you have, then you need a clear mind and an open heart. These characteristics — the clear mind and open heart — come from living in the present moment, free of the attachment to concerns about the past or the future that dwelling on regrets can cause.
Remember, the if onlys and what ifs in your life are unhappiness generators. When you dwell on them, they inform you that you can’t be happy now, and they open the door to pessimism, stress, illness, and isolation. Failure is part of the human condition. You have a human right to make mistakes, to try and not succeed, to fail outright. Wins and losses are both temporary. Your value as a person does not rest on your success at any one thing; failing at a task does not mean you’ve failed as a person, rather, it is clear and evident proof that you are human and have proper, normal human traits.
-----
Ezine@rticles, includes an essay on their website, “Today is the First Day of the Rest of Your Life,” by Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Author, "101 Great Ways To Improve Your Life," that is short, buoyant, and uplifting. This one is worth a read.
At LifeOptimizer, there is an essay entitled, “Live Life to the Fullest Through Personal Growth,” that includes a series of short introductions by Donald Latumahina with the titles, “10 Essential Tips to Change Your Life,” “Do You Want to Stay Positive? Turn Off the News,“ ”Tacking: A Strategy for Personal Success,” “A Simple Tip for Finding Good Ideas,” and “Sharpen Your Axe: The Value of Preparation.” These are essay titles, and the icon is included at the end of each scenario for reading the complete piece. Each piece has numerous specific, practical, and important suggestions for accomplishing these ideas.
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
The slogan, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life,” may be just a popular aphorism, but it carries great strength and importance when it comes to dealing with the “should haves,” “could haves,” “if onlys,” and “what ifs” of our lives. It’s not easy to release our old hurts, sadnesses, imbalances, and injustices in our lives from our past and present. Think of the power and effect that a broken marriage, a serious and debilitating illness, a serious car accident, or financial ruin can have on us now and in the future.
We all have moments in our lives that can be categorized into regrets that make us think about how different our lives would be if only XYZ had (or hadn’t) happened. It could be something as simple as “if only I had learned how to type” or as thought-provoking as “if only the first plane had missed the Tower.”
Release yourself from the pain of the past, and focus on the future.
There is no doubt our lives could be significantly different if only XYZ had (or hadn’t) happened, and we can spend enormous amounts of time imagining the various scenarios and even slipping into those fantasies. Whether there was a specific moment or some definite detail, we could have done something different, and it is even likely that this moment or detail would have made us a completely different person than we are today. Since this is true, and since the past remains the past and cannot be altered today in any way, why waste the time? We need to learn what we can learn from the past, and then move on. After all, think about it, will focusing on the should haves, could haves, if onlys and what ifs of our life change anything?
Spend some time (if necessary) — but limit it — to sorting out the reasons why what happened in the past happened. Search yourself carefully and honestly, and examine your intentions and motives. These answers may be important guides for you when you reach a crossroads point again. But, once this short and limited process of self-examination is complete then close the door, and spend no more time on it. Refocus.
Keep in constant touch with what makes you feel good about yourself. Savor all the small pleasures and successes that come your way. List the ways you naturally succeed in living a satisfying life even in humble and inconspicuous ways. You are doing the best you can so far, given what you know about yourself and life.
How do you overcome the regrets of the past? First, stay active — whatever you do, don’t drop out, lapse into obscurity, distance yourself, hide from your problems, sequester yourself, lie low, or go underground. This is no time for passivity and self-pity. One of the best ways you have for avoiding thoughts about “what might have been” is to keep your mind active and focused on other things.
How do you keep your mind active and focused on other things? Continue to be a creative, giving person by putting extra effort into personal relationships and helping others. Enjoy the comfort and warmth of your family and friendships. Help your children with their homework, or play games with them. Help your spouse with some project you’ve been putting off. Play tennis with your spouse or friends. Do volunteer work.
If you can afford to, refresh and nurture yourself by taking a vacation now. Take your camper and go fishing. Visit friends who live in Hawaii. See the Grand Canyon. Take a self-improvement course, or enroll in a course designed to hone and polish your skills. Jog, swim, bowl, paint the house, coach Little League. Spend time teaching your kids how to do something special. Remain positive, strong, and confident.
If you know that you’re going to have free time on your hands, create an agenda of things to do. Plan the time carefully by laying out a schedule, getting up early, following the schedule, and staying on track. Don’t sleep all day, overeat, over drink, or complain excessively. These are self-defeating behaviors that should trigger a need to get back to your schedule.
Keep your morale high. Do things that make your mind and body feel good. Learn techniques of relaxing, such as meditation, deep breathing, and yoga. Read the classics, or biographies of people who not only interest but inspire you.
Examine your feelings about being a success and what your criteria for success include. Perhaps the idea of high achievement — in whatever area of life — makes you uneasy. Don’t overrate the value of worldly success. Don’t let the pursuit of success replace more important goals such as developing loving and supportive relationships, gradually improving your skills and abilities, or learning to try new — and therefore risky — ventures. Beware of defining yourself only as the sum of your achievements. You are more than what you do or make. You are more than the money you earn — or the trips, clothes, friends, or possessions you accumulate. You are a growing person who can learn from all the experiences of your life, even the unpleasant ones. Give yourself credit for wanting to grow, develop, and change in new, positive ways.
Here is an important guide that can help you as you proceed in life. If your goal is to face anything in your life that comes your way — what life dishes out — with all the vigor, strength, and ability you have, then you need a clear mind and an open heart. These characteristics — the clear mind and open heart — come from living in the present moment, free of the attachment to concerns about the past or the future that dwelling on regrets can cause.
Remember, the if onlys and what ifs in your life are unhappiness generators. When you dwell on them, they inform you that you can’t be happy now, and they open the door to pessimism, stress, illness, and isolation. Failure is part of the human condition. You have a human right to make mistakes, to try and not succeed, to fail outright. Wins and losses are both temporary. Your value as a person does not rest on your success at any one thing; failing at a task does not mean you’ve failed as a person, rather, it is clear and evident proof that you are human and have proper, normal human traits.
-----
Ezine@rticles, includes an essay on their website, “Today is the First Day of the Rest of Your Life,” by Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Author, "101 Great Ways To Improve Your Life," that is short, buoyant, and uplifting. This one is worth a read.
At LifeOptimizer, there is an essay entitled, “Live Life to the Fullest Through Personal Growth,” that includes a series of short introductions by Donald Latumahina with the titles, “10 Essential Tips to Change Your Life,” “Do You Want to Stay Positive? Turn Off the News,“ ”Tacking: A Strategy for Personal Success,” “A Simple Tip for Finding Good Ideas,” and “Sharpen Your Axe: The Value of Preparation.” These are essay titles, and the icon is included at the end of each scenario for reading the complete piece. Each piece has numerous specific, practical, and important suggestions for accomplishing these ideas.
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"The really great people are the ones who know how to make the little people feel great." ---Ashleigh Brilliant
Day #118 - Strive for greatness.
Day #118 - Strive for greatness.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “The should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of your life,” and it includes a plethora of suggestions for looking toward a bright future rather than dwelling on the dreary past. If you could follow all the suggestions in this essay alone, you would have a totally different life. Guaranteed! (As much as anything in human behavior can be guaranteed!)
Share your link. Have you written anything about should haves, could haves, if onlys and what ifs? Are you a person who has lived a satisfying life? Do you dwell on the past? Do you know people who do? Can you share some insights about how to look to a bright future rather than dwell on the past? What would you like to tell people about shedding their propensity for dealing on the should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of their life? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
The should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of your life
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Remember, the if onlys and what ifs in your life are unhappiness generators. When you dwell on them, they inform you that you can’t be happy now, and they open the door to pessimism, stress, illness, and isolation. Failure is part of the human condition. You have a human right to make mistakes, to try and not succeed, to fail outright. Wins and losses are both temporary. Your value as a person does not rest on your success at any one thing; failing at a task does not mean you’ve failed as a person, rather, it is clear and evident proof that you are human and have proper, normal human traits.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about should haves, could haves, if onlys and what ifs? Are you a person who has lived a satisfying life? Do you dwell on the past? Do you know people who do? Can you share some insights about how to look to a bright future rather than dwell on the past? What would you like to tell people about shedding their propensity for dealing on the should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of their life? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
The should haves, could haves, if onlys, and what ifs of your life
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
Remember, the if onlys and what ifs in your life are unhappiness generators. When you dwell on them, they inform you that you can’t be happy now, and they open the door to pessimism, stress, illness, and isolation. Failure is part of the human condition. You have a human right to make mistakes, to try and not succeed, to fail outright. Wins and losses are both temporary. Your value as a person does not rest on your success at any one thing; failing at a task does not mean you’ve failed as a person, rather, it is clear and evident proof that you are human and have proper, normal human traits.
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Friday, January 15, 2010
Weekend Words
"Style is the dress of thoughts; and let them be ever so just. If your style is homely, coarse, and vulgar, they will appear to as much disadvantage, and be as ill received as your person, though ever so well proportioned, would, if dressed in rags, dirt, and tatters." ---Lord Chesterfield
Thursday, January 14, 2010
How do you get your mojo back?
by Richard L. Weaver II
How often have you been working on a project and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, you lose all your motivation? Here is what one respondent on the website Shine, said: “I have lost whatever it is let's call it mojo and I feel completely lost. I have always been the type of person that no matter what challenges came my way. There has been a lot. I have always pulled myself together get off my ass and do what I had to do. Now, I can't seem to get motivated and drowning in a sea of problems.” Have you ever gone through a period of your life when you hate to get out of bed, lack the energy to face the day, and have no interest in doing anything? How does this happen? Why does this happen? Can anything be done to change the situation?
First, you need to know that these situations are normal, and the cause is likely to be different for each individual. Whether it’s fear, lack of self-confidence, frustration, laziness, or exhaustion, we all face these times, and the obvious question at times like these is, “How do I get my mojo back?”
In her essay at Ezine@rticles.com, “Motivation in Tough Times - Getting Your Mojo Back,” Jill Betz Freeman, gives readers 4 steps to recover their motivation, get out of their rut, and get their ‘Mojo’ back!” The first thing Freeman suggests is to make a list. She says, “Sit down someplace quiet, breathe and write down everything that is spinning around up there [in your brain]. After you've made the list you can then start to prioritize....” “Whatever your goal is,” says Freeman, “chunk it out into smaller, more reasonable pieces that will give you success quickly. When you succeed at the first goal that success will spur you on to the next.”
Freeman’s second suggestion is to post your goal in a “I can do it,” fashion. Post it on your bathroom mirror, your refrigerator, your car, your home office, or wherever you are a lot. “I can make this speech, finish this project, face this obstacle, make this sale, or make a good impression.”
Now, Freeman says, you need to have specific ways to achieve your goal. “Keep putting one foot ahead of the other, one step at a time. This is the most important step to get where you want to be.”
Finally, Freeman says, “Squash Negative Thoughts:. For every negative thought that pops into your head and runs around in there,” you need to counter it with a barrage of positive thoughts: “I can do this,” “I have the ability,” “I have the power,” “I have the motivation,” and “I am going to make this happen.” Negative thoughts gnaw away at you and sap your energy.
At Pantskicker.com, Adam Kahn has written an essay entitled, “Cultivating Fire: How to Keep Your Motivation High.” Some of his suggestions, like make a list and prioritize the items, are the same as those Freeman makes, above. Kahn also suggests that you keep the level of challenge just right so you are motivated to move forward in a positive direction. Then he suggests that you measure your progress, read and listen to motivational material, take the time to think, and refresh your goals.
At the “Self-Motivation: Finding Your Focus” website, Andy Harnsbergerf writes, “Mental energy is a form of power, and you have total control over it. Thought power is like that of radio waves: You can’t see them working, but their effect is real and profound. By enforcing the control you have over this mental force and learning how to channel it into your intended outcome, you can directly influence your performance.....”
At the website “Intelligent Self-Development,” Jason Ivers has written an essay, “Stuck In A Rut - 7 Ways To Kick Your Life In The Butt,” in which he suggests that you begin at once: 1) Don’t procrastinate, 2) Expand your network by meeting new people, 3) Do something you’ve never done before, 4) Re-evaluate your goals — especially the long-term ones — and see that they are still ones you still want, 5) Break the goals down into smaller goals that can be accomplished. Accomplishing smaller goals will provide motivation to keep moving forward, 6) Find a way to express your creativity. Ivers says, “Unused creativity builds up and puts pressure on you internally, increasing the feeling of being trapped, not going anywhere... or ‘stuck in a rut.’” and, 7) Change your definition of success.
This latter point regarding success is an important one, and it is not mentioned by the previous writers. Ivers makes the point in this way: “Success doesn't have to be measured by society's standards... you can be successful by being a good person, by taking care of the people you care about, by producing creative output (see above item), or many other things. Don't just stick with the default definition society gave you, choose your own..”
At steve-olson.com, Steve Olson offers something, too, that previous writers have not said: “This [when you want to restore your motivation] is when you need to find a quiet spot, close your eyes, and visualize your ideal outcome. Imagine life when you reach your goal. Imagine in as much detail as you can. Imagine how you will feel. Imagine how it will look. Imagine your impact on other people. Do it to remind yourself why you’re working so hard. The stronger the images you can etch into your mind, the quicker you will restore your motivation.”
Lots of writers, lots of suggestions. The point is that you don’t have to remain long without your motivation, but nobody can do it for you. You have the control, you are in charge, and it’s up to you. You have the suggestions, you know the route, now, get busy!
-----
At steve-olson.com, referred to just above, in an essay, “21 Surefire Ways to Stay Motivated,” there are 21 practical and realistic suggestions that will help you stay motivated.
Rebecca Brents, at her Enchanted Spirits website, has a motivational essay entitled, “Motivation,” and includes many of the suggestions written above, however, she writes in a delightful and easy manner, and the essay is enjoyable.
-----
Copyright January, 2009 by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
How often have you been working on a project and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, you lose all your motivation? Here is what one respondent on the website Shine, said: “I have lost whatever it is let's call it mojo and I feel completely lost. I have always been the type of person that no matter what challenges came my way. There has been a lot. I have always pulled myself together get off my ass and do what I had to do. Now, I can't seem to get motivated and drowning in a sea of problems.” Have you ever gone through a period of your life when you hate to get out of bed, lack the energy to face the day, and have no interest in doing anything? How does this happen? Why does this happen? Can anything be done to change the situation?
First, you need to know that these situations are normal, and the cause is likely to be different for each individual. Whether it’s fear, lack of self-confidence, frustration, laziness, or exhaustion, we all face these times, and the obvious question at times like these is, “How do I get my mojo back?”
In her essay at Ezine@rticles.com, “Motivation in Tough Times - Getting Your Mojo Back,” Jill Betz Freeman, gives readers 4 steps to recover their motivation, get out of their rut, and get their ‘Mojo’ back!” The first thing Freeman suggests is to make a list. She says, “Sit down someplace quiet, breathe and write down everything that is spinning around up there [in your brain]. After you've made the list you can then start to prioritize....” “Whatever your goal is,” says Freeman, “chunk it out into smaller, more reasonable pieces that will give you success quickly. When you succeed at the first goal that success will spur you on to the next.”
Freeman’s second suggestion is to post your goal in a “I can do it,” fashion. Post it on your bathroom mirror, your refrigerator, your car, your home office, or wherever you are a lot. “I can make this speech, finish this project, face this obstacle, make this sale, or make a good impression.”
Now, Freeman says, you need to have specific ways to achieve your goal. “Keep putting one foot ahead of the other, one step at a time. This is the most important step to get where you want to be.”
Finally, Freeman says, “Squash Negative Thoughts:. For every negative thought that pops into your head and runs around in there,” you need to counter it with a barrage of positive thoughts: “I can do this,” “I have the ability,” “I have the power,” “I have the motivation,” and “I am going to make this happen.” Negative thoughts gnaw away at you and sap your energy.
At Pantskicker.com, Adam Kahn has written an essay entitled, “Cultivating Fire: How to Keep Your Motivation High.” Some of his suggestions, like make a list and prioritize the items, are the same as those Freeman makes, above. Kahn also suggests that you keep the level of challenge just right so you are motivated to move forward in a positive direction. Then he suggests that you measure your progress, read and listen to motivational material, take the time to think, and refresh your goals.
At the “Self-Motivation: Finding Your Focus” website, Andy Harnsbergerf writes, “Mental energy is a form of power, and you have total control over it. Thought power is like that of radio waves: You can’t see them working, but their effect is real and profound. By enforcing the control you have over this mental force and learning how to channel it into your intended outcome, you can directly influence your performance.....”
At the website “Intelligent Self-Development,” Jason Ivers has written an essay, “Stuck In A Rut - 7 Ways To Kick Your Life In The Butt,” in which he suggests that you begin at once: 1) Don’t procrastinate, 2) Expand your network by meeting new people, 3) Do something you’ve never done before, 4) Re-evaluate your goals — especially the long-term ones — and see that they are still ones you still want, 5) Break the goals down into smaller goals that can be accomplished. Accomplishing smaller goals will provide motivation to keep moving forward, 6) Find a way to express your creativity. Ivers says, “Unused creativity builds up and puts pressure on you internally, increasing the feeling of being trapped, not going anywhere... or ‘stuck in a rut.’” and, 7) Change your definition of success.
This latter point regarding success is an important one, and it is not mentioned by the previous writers. Ivers makes the point in this way: “Success doesn't have to be measured by society's standards... you can be successful by being a good person, by taking care of the people you care about, by producing creative output (see above item), or many other things. Don't just stick with the default definition society gave you, choose your own..”
At steve-olson.com, Steve Olson offers something, too, that previous writers have not said: “This [when you want to restore your motivation] is when you need to find a quiet spot, close your eyes, and visualize your ideal outcome. Imagine life when you reach your goal. Imagine in as much detail as you can. Imagine how you will feel. Imagine how it will look. Imagine your impact on other people. Do it to remind yourself why you’re working so hard. The stronger the images you can etch into your mind, the quicker you will restore your motivation.”
Lots of writers, lots of suggestions. The point is that you don’t have to remain long without your motivation, but nobody can do it for you. You have the control, you are in charge, and it’s up to you. You have the suggestions, you know the route, now, get busy!
-----
At steve-olson.com, referred to just above, in an essay, “21 Surefire Ways to Stay Motivated,” there are 21 practical and realistic suggestions that will help you stay motivated.
Rebecca Brents, at her Enchanted Spirits website, has a motivational essay entitled, “Motivation,” and includes many of the suggestions written above, however, she writes in a delightful and easy manner, and the essay is enjoyable.
-----
Copyright January, 2009 by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"If you wish in this world to advance
Your merits you're bound to enhance;
You must stir it and stump it,
And blow your own trumpet,
Or, trust me, you haven't a chance."
---W.S. Gilbert, Ruddigore
Day #117 - Never doubt your own power and abilities.
Your merits you're bound to enhance;
You must stir it and stump it,
And blow your own trumpet,
Or, trust me, you haven't a chance."
---W.S. Gilbert, Ruddigore
Day #117 - Never doubt your own power and abilities.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “‘Get your mojo back,” and, like the previous two essays, it comes just after the new year has rolled around. How appropriate, because if the new year ushered in a desire to turn over a new leaf, list and attempt to fulfill New Year’s Resolutions, or begin again to try to forge change in your life, then I would suggest one of your challenges will be to gather together all the mojo you have to accomplish your goals.. This essay is perfect for the time because it provides suggestions for getting your mojo back. Actions require that you are fully motivated. You need to read this essay!
Share your link. Have you written anything about getting your mojo back? What do you do to get motivation? Has it happened to you? When did it happen? How did it happen? What effects have taken place? Do you know others who are motivated? Can you share some insights about how, when, where, or why motivation takes place? What would you like to tell people about motivation? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Get your mojo back
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
How often have you been working on a project and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, you lose all your motivation? Here is what one respondent on the website Shine, said: “I have lost whatever it is let's call it mojo and I feel completely lost. I have always been the type of person that no matter what challenges came my way. There has been a lot. I have always pulled myself together get off my ass and do what I had to do. Now, I can't seem to get motivated and drowning in a sea of problems.” Have you ever gone through a period of your life when you hate to get out of bed, lack the energy to face the day, and have no interest in doing anything? How does this happen? Why does this happen? Can anything be done to change the situation?
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about getting your mojo back? What do you do to get motivation? Has it happened to you? When did it happen? How did it happen? What effects have taken place? Do you know others who are motivated? Can you share some insights about how, when, where, or why motivation takes place? What would you like to tell people about motivation? Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
Get your mojo back
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
How often have you been working on a project and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, you lose all your motivation? Here is what one respondent on the website Shine, said: “I have lost whatever it is let's call it mojo and I feel completely lost. I have always been the type of person that no matter what challenges came my way. There has been a lot. I have always pulled myself together get off my ass and do what I had to do. Now, I can't seem to get motivated and drowning in a sea of problems.” Have you ever gone through a period of your life when you hate to get out of bed, lack the energy to face the day, and have no interest in doing anything? How does this happen? Why does this happen? Can anything be done to change the situation?
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, January 11, 2010
Book Review Mondays
by Jeff Jarvis
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
by Ronald Takaki
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
This is an absolutely fascinating, well-written, extremely well-documented book that is revised from the 1993 edition. If you are interested in multi-culturalism, you must read Takaki’s book. When I say “well-documented,” there are 71 pages of notes in this 529-page book. The index itself is 10 pages long. Takaki covers the cultural perspectives of the Irish, Japanese, blacks, Native Americans, and others as various times throughout American history, and what is great about the book is that he puts you, the reader, right into the mindset of the people he is discussing so you come away with some of the insights, feelings, and reactions of various people. This is a credible, believable, and educational work that makes an important and significant contribution to multicultural literature. The book is not a complete history, but what Takaki does is focus in-depth on a variety of events and issues that reveal the cultural perspective he is discussing. There are some people who may be offended by what Takaki writes, especially when he details some of the horrendous crimes the majority whites committed against minority races — especially people who have read and believed what is written in many mainline required textbooks. Nicole, from Oxford, Ohio, explained this in her review of the book: “One thing I have to teach my conservative, mid-Western students is to move beyond the ‘white guilt’ many Americans seem to suffer from in order to see that the oppression minorities were victim to was a systematic process based on totalitarian ideals, and not some inherent white evil. I believe by presenting the information the way Takaki has, he allows readers to read a multifaceted version of American history (not the myopic, one dimensional history taught in American schools) that effectively places different groups within a specific time and place in history. If you are not afraid to read some truth about America (without the artificiality of ‘Pomp and Circumstance’), this is for you.” If you like American history, you will love this book.
Through our reading, researching, and writing, And Then Some Publishing (and our extended family of readers) mine volumes of books representing a wide variety of tastes. We use the books in our writing, test and try suggested techniques, and we read for enjoyment as well. We wouldn't spend the time reviewing the books if we didn't get something out of it. Read more reviews on other fantastic books at our BookWorksRules.com website.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Weekend Words
"People think that I can teach them style. What stuff it all is! Have something to say, and say it as clearly as you can. That is the only secret of style." ---Matthew Arnold
Thursday, January 7, 2010
To Act in Spite of Your Fears Is a Genuine Act of Courage
by Richard L. Weaver II
Terrorism is a threat. Salmonella is a problem. Earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, and hurricanes more frequent. The economy has not recovered. Our jobs are being outsourced. It is possible that the future will bring us even greater suffering and less happiness. Fear is an unpleasant, often strong, emotion, caused by anticipation or awareness of danger. Because it is a powerful emotion at the very core of our desire for self-preservation, it is the gatekeeper of our comfort zone, and our comfort zone is whatever is familiar to us.
Our comfort zone can be represented by a circle we draw around ourselves. Into that circle we place the people we know, the routines to which we have become accustomed, and the places where we feel at home. Whether these are good, happy, sad, or bad is immaterial. It is our comfort with them that keeps them in the circle. That is why people stay in bad marriages, boring jobs, and other belittling situations. Being afraid can feel normal to the point that calm or peacefulness may feel foreign or just plain uncomfortable. Breaking the bond of familiarity confronts us with the fear of the unknown: “Better the devil we know than the devil we don’t know.”
There is no doubt that there are times when fear is appropriate and useful. It helps us protect ourselves and to survive difficult times. There is little support in our society, however, for the healthy expression of fear; thus, many of us have become controlled and manipulated by unnamed, repressed fear. For many, it means a lifetime of confirming rather than relieving our fears. What many people do not realize is that fear limits our existence, creates greater fear, is the usual reaction to fear, and stifles true power. It is an unassailable barrier to living life to its fullest. As Marcus Aurelius said, “A man’s life is what his thoughts make of it.”
What does the voice of fear sound like? It is the voice in our heads that wonders what other people are thinking and how they will react. It wonders what might happen to the economy, to housing prices, to our partner, to our family, to our lifestyle, to our image, to our car. It is the voice that asks us, “Have I made the right decision?” “Will I have enough money?” “Will I be able to cope?”
It is the voice, too, that asks (perhaps not in so many words), “How will what is happening in the world affect my comfort zone?” And when we see things in the world either affecting or potentially affecting what is within the circle drawn around us, we not only express fear, but we are always finding more possibilities to fear.
This does not mean we should not think about the future or that we should not make plans. We must always look ahead and gauge the outcome of our actions. But when our mind is filled with the fear of what might or might not happen, both our intelligence and our imagination are being negatively affected. It is mental chatter that keeps us trapped.
When our mind is consumed with fear, it is not available to notice what is going on around us, to hear the sounds of birds, to feel the gentle touch of the wind, to perceive the creaking of the trees, to sense the mood of our spouse, to observe the reactions to our words, to spot others’ emotions or detect our own, or to consider how our body feels. Fear makes us half-conscious. Fear keeps us in our comfort zone. Fear leads us to resist the very changes that would help us solve our existing problems. As Mark Twain said, “I’ve lived a long life and seen a lot of hard times...most of which never happened.”
We fear change, because change can threaten our careers, our relationships, our position, our sense of control, our feelings of security, and our freedom. Because of the way we fear change, we resist new technologies, new working practices, new customs, new ways of thinking. We resist changes to our plans, circumstances, and lifestyle. We hold onto, for dear life, everything within our comfort zone no matter how unpleasant, contrary, untrue, annoying, troublesome, obnoxious, hateful, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, or disgusting.
How do you remove the gatekeeper and expand your comfort zone? Identifying your fears is the first helpful step towards overcoming them. Ask yourself, “What will I not do that I would really love to be doing?” “Does the way I live express or result in self-limitation?” “Am I over-cautious and prone to anxiety or panic?” “Is my overall view of life negative and suspicious?” It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience when you really stop to look fear in the face.”
Second, you need to put something in place of fear. It could be the mind-clearing repetition of a mantra such as “I am safe in this moment.” It could be the reverent reiteration of a favorite prayer or sound. It could be imagining yourself in a calm and peaceful place such as sitting in a comfortable chair listening to the ocean waves tumble onto the beach. Remembering any past positive moments may work. Taking deliberate and well-prepared actions to ease or ward off our fears generates both energy and strength.
Third, just as you have allowed fears into your life, you can just as easily stop them from interfering with your life. Take charge. Refuse to continue living in the land of devastating possibilities. Stop the constant barrage of terrifying news by turning off the television, putting down the newspaper, and switching the radio to Mozart. If it is the 24/7 broadcasts of fear and mayhem that are kicking up your fear-based belief systems, do not cooperate. Instead, get involved with something greater than yourself.
Fourth, resolve to see things differently. Resolve to experience new ideas, have an open heart, take risks, dwell on the positive rather than the negative, and listen to people who cheer you on rather than those who echo your fear.
Remember that those sitting in the rocking chairs at the end of their lives are not regretting the actions they took. Instead, they are regretting the ones they did not take. When you can act in spite of your fears, you have achieved that fleeting thing that we all admire so much in others—the genuine act of courage.
-----
At JobCircle.com, in an essay, “Beyond your fear,” written by Julie Fuimano, MBA, RN is an Executive Coach with Nurturing Your Success Inc., first defines fear, then has a section entitled, “Fear as Motivator and as Suppressor:,” includes a section called, “Fear as a Message,” and ends with one called,“Uncover Your Greatest Fear.” She concludes her essay saying, “It's one thing to be afraid, it's quite another to let that fear run your life. YOU can decide for yourself how you want fear to impact your life. Be in charge of your fear by creating awareness around it and give yourself the freedom to choose.”
Victoria, at her website AskVictoria, includes an essay entitled, “Facing your Fears: 3 Steps to Facing any Fear.” Her three steps are, 1) Awareness, 2) Acknowledgment, and 3) Action.
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Terrorism is a threat. Salmonella is a problem. Earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, and hurricanes more frequent. The economy has not recovered. Our jobs are being outsourced. It is possible that the future will bring us even greater suffering and less happiness. Fear is an unpleasant, often strong, emotion, caused by anticipation or awareness of danger. Because it is a powerful emotion at the very core of our desire for self-preservation, it is the gatekeeper of our comfort zone, and our comfort zone is whatever is familiar to us.
Our comfort zone can be represented by a circle we draw around ourselves. Into that circle we place the people we know, the routines to which we have become accustomed, and the places where we feel at home. Whether these are good, happy, sad, or bad is immaterial. It is our comfort with them that keeps them in the circle. That is why people stay in bad marriages, boring jobs, and other belittling situations. Being afraid can feel normal to the point that calm or peacefulness may feel foreign or just plain uncomfortable. Breaking the bond of familiarity confronts us with the fear of the unknown: “Better the devil we know than the devil we don’t know.”
There is no doubt that there are times when fear is appropriate and useful. It helps us protect ourselves and to survive difficult times. There is little support in our society, however, for the healthy expression of fear; thus, many of us have become controlled and manipulated by unnamed, repressed fear. For many, it means a lifetime of confirming rather than relieving our fears. What many people do not realize is that fear limits our existence, creates greater fear, is the usual reaction to fear, and stifles true power. It is an unassailable barrier to living life to its fullest. As Marcus Aurelius said, “A man’s life is what his thoughts make of it.”
What does the voice of fear sound like? It is the voice in our heads that wonders what other people are thinking and how they will react. It wonders what might happen to the economy, to housing prices, to our partner, to our family, to our lifestyle, to our image, to our car. It is the voice that asks us, “Have I made the right decision?” “Will I have enough money?” “Will I be able to cope?”
It is the voice, too, that asks (perhaps not in so many words), “How will what is happening in the world affect my comfort zone?” And when we see things in the world either affecting or potentially affecting what is within the circle drawn around us, we not only express fear, but we are always finding more possibilities to fear.
This does not mean we should not think about the future or that we should not make plans. We must always look ahead and gauge the outcome of our actions. But when our mind is filled with the fear of what might or might not happen, both our intelligence and our imagination are being negatively affected. It is mental chatter that keeps us trapped.
When our mind is consumed with fear, it is not available to notice what is going on around us, to hear the sounds of birds, to feel the gentle touch of the wind, to perceive the creaking of the trees, to sense the mood of our spouse, to observe the reactions to our words, to spot others’ emotions or detect our own, or to consider how our body feels. Fear makes us half-conscious. Fear keeps us in our comfort zone. Fear leads us to resist the very changes that would help us solve our existing problems. As Mark Twain said, “I’ve lived a long life and seen a lot of hard times...most of which never happened.”
We fear change, because change can threaten our careers, our relationships, our position, our sense of control, our feelings of security, and our freedom. Because of the way we fear change, we resist new technologies, new working practices, new customs, new ways of thinking. We resist changes to our plans, circumstances, and lifestyle. We hold onto, for dear life, everything within our comfort zone no matter how unpleasant, contrary, untrue, annoying, troublesome, obnoxious, hateful, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, or disgusting.
How do you remove the gatekeeper and expand your comfort zone? Identifying your fears is the first helpful step towards overcoming them. Ask yourself, “What will I not do that I would really love to be doing?” “Does the way I live express or result in self-limitation?” “Am I over-cautious and prone to anxiety or panic?” “Is my overall view of life negative and suspicious?” It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience when you really stop to look fear in the face.”
Second, you need to put something in place of fear. It could be the mind-clearing repetition of a mantra such as “I am safe in this moment.” It could be the reverent reiteration of a favorite prayer or sound. It could be imagining yourself in a calm and peaceful place such as sitting in a comfortable chair listening to the ocean waves tumble onto the beach. Remembering any past positive moments may work. Taking deliberate and well-prepared actions to ease or ward off our fears generates both energy and strength.
Third, just as you have allowed fears into your life, you can just as easily stop them from interfering with your life. Take charge. Refuse to continue living in the land of devastating possibilities. Stop the constant barrage of terrifying news by turning off the television, putting down the newspaper, and switching the radio to Mozart. If it is the 24/7 broadcasts of fear and mayhem that are kicking up your fear-based belief systems, do not cooperate. Instead, get involved with something greater than yourself.
Fourth, resolve to see things differently. Resolve to experience new ideas, have an open heart, take risks, dwell on the positive rather than the negative, and listen to people who cheer you on rather than those who echo your fear.
Remember that those sitting in the rocking chairs at the end of their lives are not regretting the actions they took. Instead, they are regretting the ones they did not take. When you can act in spite of your fears, you have achieved that fleeting thing that we all admire so much in others—the genuine act of courage.
-----
At JobCircle.com, in an essay, “Beyond your fear,” written by Julie Fuimano, MBA, RN is an Executive Coach with Nurturing Your Success Inc., first defines fear, then has a section entitled, “Fear as Motivator and as Suppressor:,” includes a section called, “Fear as a Message,” and ends with one called,“Uncover Your Greatest Fear.” She concludes her essay saying, “It's one thing to be afraid, it's quite another to let that fear run your life. YOU can decide for yourself how you want fear to impact your life. Be in charge of your fear by creating awareness around it and give yourself the freedom to choose.”
Victoria, at her website AskVictoria, includes an essay entitled, “Facing your Fears: 3 Steps to Facing any Fear.” Her three steps are, 1) Awareness, 2) Acknowledgment, and 3) Action.
-----
Copyright January, 2010 - And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
SMOERs: Words of Wisdom
"Imagination disposes of everything; it creates beauty, justice, and happiness, which is everything in this world." ---Pascal
Day #116 - Allow your imagination to run free.
Day #116 - Allow your imagination to run free.
SMOERs: Self-Motivation, Optimism, Encouragement Rules! - Daily Reminders for Outstanding Living
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
An everyday guide full of quotations to uplift your spirits.
Free 10-Day sample: smoers.com
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
And Then Some News
Thursday’s essay is called, “‘To act in spite of your fears is a genuine act of courage,” and it comes just after the new year has rolled around. How appropriate, because if the new year ushered in a desire to turn over a new leaf, list and attempt to fulfill New Year’s Resolutions, or begin again to try to forge change in your life, then I would suggest one of your challenges will be to act in spite of your fears. This essay is perfect for the time because it provides specific suggestions you can implement at once. To act requires that you get out of your comfort zone. You need to read this essay!
Share your link. Have you written anything about acting in spite of your fears? Do you think it’s a genuine act of courage? Have you actually been able to move out of your comfort zone? When did it happen? How did it happen? What effects have taken place? Do you know others who have acted in spite of their fears? Can you share some insights about how, when, where, or why it happened? What would you like to tell people about the advantages (or disadvantages) of moving out of their comfort zones? Of acting in spite of their fears! Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
To act in spite of your fears is a genuine act of courage
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
When our mind is consumed with fear, it is not available to notice what is going on around us, to hear the sounds of birds, to feel the gentle touch of the wind, to perceive the creaking of the trees, to sense the mood of our spouse, to observe the reactions to our words, to spot others’ emotions or detect our own, or to consider how our body feels. Fear makes us half-conscious. Fear keeps us in our comfort zone. Fear leads us to resist the very changes that would help us solve our existing problems. As Mark Twain said, “I’ve lived a long life and seen a lot of hard times...most of which never happened.”
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Share your link. Have you written anything about acting in spite of your fears? Do you think it’s a genuine act of courage? Have you actually been able to move out of your comfort zone? When did it happen? How did it happen? What effects have taken place? Do you know others who have acted in spite of their fears? Can you share some insights about how, when, where, or why it happened? What would you like to tell people about the advantages (or disadvantages) of moving out of their comfort zones? Of acting in spite of their fears! Share your link with us. We’ll post it and move traffic in your direction. And, a big “thank you,” in advance, from AndThenSomeWorks.com, for sharing your link.
Click here to LINK your And Then Some story
Thursday's And Then Some Essay preview:
To act in spite of your fears is a genuine act of courage
by Richard L. Weaver II
Excerpt:
When our mind is consumed with fear, it is not available to notice what is going on around us, to hear the sounds of birds, to feel the gentle touch of the wind, to perceive the creaking of the trees, to sense the mood of our spouse, to observe the reactions to our words, to spot others’ emotions or detect our own, or to consider how our body feels. Fear makes us half-conscious. Fear keeps us in our comfort zone. Fear leads us to resist the very changes that would help us solve our existing problems. As Mark Twain said, “I’ve lived a long life and seen a lot of hard times...most of which never happened.”
And Then Some Works - see you Thursday!!
Monday, January 4, 2010
Book Review Mondays
by Kevin Hogan
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
by David D. Burns
Book Review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
Burns’ previous book, Feeling Good, sold over four million copies; this book has the potential of doing the same. It is outstanding. In this 255-page book, there are six parts and 30 chapters — approximately 8½ pages per chapter. Some of the intriguing chapter titles include, “Why We Secretly Love to Hate,” “Three Ideas That Can Change Your Life,” “How Good Is Your Relationship? The Relationship Satisfaction Test,” “The Price of Intimacy,” “Good Communication vs. Bad Communication,” “How We Control Other People,” “The Five Secrets of Effective Communication,” “The Disarming Technique,” “Intimacy Traing for Couples: The One-Minute Drill,” Part Five, “Common Traps—How to Avoid Them,” and “Positive Reframing: Opening the Door to Intimacy—and Success.” You can see, just from the titles, how the information he presents is directly tied to questions, problems, and issues that all couples face. The beauty of the book, however, and the practical, realistic tools Burns offers readers apply to all relationships, whether they are spouse, family, friends, or co-workers. I have always found Burns’ approach to readers direct, interesting, warm, and engaging, and his “radically different approach” in this book is labeled “Cognitive Interpersonal Therapy,” and if my interpersonal textbook had continued (the seventh edition of it was the last), I would have incorporated his basic principles of CIT in my textbook: 1) “We all provoke and maintain the exact relationship problems that we complain about.” 2) “We deny our own role in the conflict because self-examination is so shocking and painful, and because we’re secretly rewarded by the problem we’re complaining about.” 3) “We all have far more power than we think to transform troubled relations—if we’re willing to stop blaming the other person and focus instead on changing ourselves” (p. 36). The tables, bulleted points, suggested steps, and examples are helpful, realistic, and worthwhile. For anyone having relationship problems, wanting to avoid relationship problems, or wanting to know what kind of advice to give to others, this is an outstanding choice.
Through our reading, researching, and writing, And Then Some Publishing (and our extended family of readers) mine volumes of books representing a wide variety of tastes. We use the books in our writing, test and try suggested techniques, and we read for enjoyment as well. We wouldn't spend the time reviewing the books if we didn't get something out of it. Read more reviews on other fantastic books at our BookWorksRules.com website.
Friday, January 1, 2010
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